Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week


Although the combat in Gaza right now is like the Hatfields and McCoys with artillery capabilities, tensions on the home front here in America have also taken a turn for the toasty. As we’re finding out (or in some cases reaffirming because we’ve been paying fucking attention), there are some people here who are sympathetic to the plight of those in Gaza to the point they’re willing to minimize or wave away the horrible actions of Hamas.

Like The Squad’s Rashida Tlaib.

Seems Rep. Tlaib has been repeating an oft-used phrase with regards to Palestine’s demands of Israel: “From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.” And Leftists have been twisting themselves more than a hot yoga studio that doubles as a pretzel oven trying to tone down what this phrase means.

And if recent media spin is any indication, we’re gonna be hearing “Well, Ackchyually” from the Left for weeks to come just over the “from the river to the sea” bit. Well, Ackchyually…I mean actually, the definition of the phrase is much simpler to grasp.

from the river to the sea

What the Left thinks it means – a complex phrase that can mean any number of things, mostly peaceful statements of a desire for Palestinian freedom

What it really means – a simple phrase calling for the eradication of Israel

See? Told ya it was simple!

The phrase originated back in the 1960d, eventually being adopted as a slogan by those lovely, peaceful people who never wanted to destroy Israel, the Palestine Liberation Organization. For any Leftists or the historically illiterate (I know, I know, I’m repeating myself) reading this, that was sarcasm. Although it’s been interpreted within historical context as a desire for a democratic state of Palestine, it’s been taken up by antisemites like the PLO and Hamas to mean the total destruction of Israel.

Wait a minutes…the PLO and Hamas want Israel to go the way of the latest Marvel movie flop? Who could have seen that coming?

Again, sarcasm.

Since the most vocal and the most violent Palestinian elements in Gaza appear to be of this mindset, I’m gonna go out on a limb and say they’re not really pushing for a democratic state called Palestine. And judging from the way they’ve acted since October 7th, that’s a pretty safe bet.

Of course, the Left and the media (repeating myself again) know this deep down in their core, which is why they have to lie about the phrase through conflating the more peaceful meaning with the more prevalent current meaning. There are a couple of reasons for this. First, Leftists know shit about fuck when it comes to foreign affairs.

Second, they’ve spent years building a narrative about how those mean old Israelis are tormenting those poor Palestinians, and if you disagree, you’re an islamophobe. For more information on islamophobia, and so I can throw in an absolutely shameless plug for a previous Leftist Lexicon entry, check out this link.

Third, the Left sees political opportunity in supporting the Palestinians, considering The Squad includes two Muslim members and the entirety of The Squad tend to be the whiniest bitches this side of “The View.” With more Muslims coming to America (and voting for people who share their faith), the Left sees dollar signs and votes. Fuck the optics! These Muslims need the Left to advance their agenda!

Then again, given the Left’s position on abortion and their blatant hatred for Jews, I guess it’s not that much of a leap for them to want to abort Israeli children no matter what trimester it is.

Fourth, if you piss off Muslims enough, things tend to get…explodey.

And fifth, Israel holds a special place in Christian hearts, and since Christians tend to vote Republican, the Left has to take a contrarian view. And the fact is already feeds into their bigotry is icing on the cake.

Hence, the whitewashing of “from the river to the sea.” Ironic, considering how much Leftists hate white people, don’t ya think?

The problem with this approach is it’s bullshit, hypocritical, and utterly stupid. I mean, there are several problems, but these three pretty much sum up my feelings on the matter at hand. I’ve already explained why it’s bullshit, so that leaves hypocritical and utterly stupid to go.

Unfortunately for Leftists, I loaded for bear.

With “from the river to the sea,” the Left is giving Palestinians the most generous interpretation of the phrase, so much so I wouldn’t be surprised if they would try to write it off on next year’s taxes as a donation. Compare this to anything a Republican might say. You know…like, oh I don’t know…Donald Trump referring to “very fine people on both sides.” Yeah, that turn of a phrase was treated worse than David Duke at the NAACP Image Awards, even though the context was clear that Trump wasn’t referring to the white nationalists at the time and said so repeatedly. And I say this as someone who is not a Trump fan, partially because of the way he tends to mangle the English language over topics that would be a slam-dunk for anyone else. Well, except for Puddin’ Head Joe and Kamala Harris, but you get the idea.

And it’s not just Trump who’s been the victim of Leftists taking the worst possible interpretation of what anybody to the right of Nancy Pelosi says. Glenn Beck, Fox News, and Newt Gingrich just to name three off the top of my head have all been victims of intentional smears by the Left through mischaracterization, taking statements out of context, or outright fabricating “dog whistles” that “prove” the Right’s racism.

Of course, if the Left can hear these “dog whistles” wouldn’t that make them racist?

Never mind.

The point is the Left treat communication as both a weapon and a shield depending on what side of the political aisle you’re on. The fact the Left is willing to go to bat for people who would kill them at the drop of a bomb vest but not a fellow American who disagrees with them politically speaks volumes to the utter intellectual and depravity we’re dealing with here.

And I think that last sentence covers the utterly stupid part I mentioned earlier.

Look, it’s cool if you think Palestine should have its own country, and if I had my druthers and could reasonably expect the leaders of this country wouldn’t use said druthers to set up base camp for Holocaust II: Electric Boogaloo, I would push for that to happen. The problem is I don’t think we can trust that to happen due to the number of Islamic extremists within the pro-Palestinian movement. Their holy doctrine allows violence against non-believers, and these kids tend to take the Quran very seriously/literally. And considering that same doctrine says it’s okay to lie to non-Muslims…well, let’s just say I’m going to pass on the Trust Fall with these folks.

That brings us back to “from the river to the sea.” I know this is going to surprise you, but I’m not going to be as generous with my interpretation as the Left is. Given the nature of Muslim extremists like those in Hamas to lie and play people for fools, there is no wiggle room here for me. They want to turn Israel into a parking lot, possibly made of glass if Iran supplies them with nukes. Anyone who says differently is an idiot.

Or a Leftist. But again, I repeat myself.

And, no, that’s not sarcasm.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week


Since the Gaza Strip turned into a war zone, there have been a number of disturbing events. Violence against Jews has risen. Acts of anti-Jewish vandalism are rampant. Leftist strongholds have let the mask drop to show how they really feel about Israel.

In response to this, the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration swung into action. With their fingers fully on the pulse of the nation and how Americans feel about Israel, they gathered their best minds and announced a national initiative to combat…islamophobia.

Remember, kids, this idea came from their best minds.

Since the Left brought it up, I figured we should revisit islamophobia in the current context and have a few laughs in the process.

islamophobia

What the Left thinks it means – irrational fear or hatred of Muslims, currently fueled by high emotions over the Gaza situation

What it really means – a term used to deflect legitimate criticism of Muslim extremists

Let me make something perfectly clear. I don’t hate Islam anymore than I hate anything else. The customs and practices are different, but that’s not a reason to start stringing up Muslims. Just like with Christianity, there are different belief systems under the Muslim banner, some more uptight, others more relaxed. Regardless, I extend that offer of kinship until such time as it gets revoked because I would like the same for my beliefs.

Having said that, Islam has a problem, namely there are some really uptight assholes ruining it for the rest of the faithful. As much as Leftists like to paint people like me as radical extremists destined to lash out with violence, I don’t see that many Amish drive-bys. Mainly because they tend not to have cars, but the point’s the same. Christianity is not by its nature violent. You could count on the two hands of the world’s worst power tool demonstrator the number of Christians who have acted violently in the past century or so. And last time Christians did act violently on a wide scale (i.e. the Crusades), it didn’t work out for them.

Islam, on the other hand…well, let’s just say they have a ways to go in the non-violence workbook. And it’s for this reason people are a little skittish about completely trusting our Muslim brothers and sisters. When Christianity gets radicalized, you tend to get Amway-level aggressive proselytizing. When Islam gets radicalized, you tend to get explosions. They are not the same.

Naturally, the Left has found a way to weaponize prudent caution by shaming people into ignoring it through shame. Islamophobia works in the same way “racist” does with the Left: take any less-than-positive statement, put it through their intersectionality prism (with a quick consultation of their Oppression Decoder Rings), and turn it into hate. You know, just like The Squad!

With regards to the fighting in Gaza, the Left has ramped up the islamophobia rhetoric to paint Muslims as being persecuted by Israel. And, just like clockwork, the squawking points went out for Leftists to recite without self-reflection. Although there are Muslims affected by the current situation, the Left has pulled a bit of a switcheroo.

Take any current Leftist statement about islamophobia, for example. Notice there is one name that never gets mentioned in the same breath as decrying islamophobia. That’s right, kids. I’m talking about Hamas. By only mentioning Muslims, Leftists don’t have to deal with the fact there are Muslims like Hamas running around out there. And they use Israel’s military strength to create a David vs. Goliath where the Muslims (i.e. Hamas) are the underdogs.

That same approach works with islamophobia, too. By painting Muslims as the victims, the Left has made it next to impossible for any legitimate discourse on whether radical Islam is a problem. (Spoiler Alert: it is.) So, all of Islam gets a whitewash and the Left can keep avoiding a major blind spot it has regarding it. A win-win!

Well, except for all the people who are injured, kidnapped, or murdered by the radical Muslims like Hamas, of course.

There is legitimate hatred of Muslims out there, but it’s not nearly as widespread as the Left wants us to believe. But this gives the Left an incentive to pump up the numbers by making any slight against Muslims islamophobic. And I do me any slight. The problem becomes separating the real islamophobia from the bullshit and being unafraid to call it out when it happens.

Guess who I trust least with doing any of that.

Maybe it’s me, but it’s almost like the Left is so focused on fighting islamophobia as an apology of sorts for our response to 9/11, which was to…go after Muslim extremists and their proxies. Even though there were examples of dumb people treating anyone with darker brown skin like a terrorist, most of the anger was directed at those who supported the attack on America.

To the Left, this was a black stain on our history, so they made it a central point of their platform from that point on to reject the idea there are bad Muslims, just good Muslims being persecuted by evil nasty poopyhead Right Wingers.

Wait…isn’t that the same rationale the Left used with illegal Mexican immigrants?

And wouldn’t that be a great strategy for people who want America to be destroyed to exploit? But I’m sure that would never happen, right?

That insinuation may make people call me islamophobic, and I don’t care. The term has lost all meaning for me because it’s been oversaturated like the Travis Kelce/Taylor Swift relationship. At that point, I enter Don’t Give A Fuck Mode. The fact the Left continues to pretend islamophobia is rampant, especially at a time when Muslim extremists are responsible for killing people who were at a fucking music festival, is troubling. How many more people are Leftists going to allow to be killed or hurt just to protect their feefees?

If the media coverage of the war in Gaza is any indication, as many as it takes.

In the meantime, it’s incumbent upon us to keep cooler heads and not treat every Muslim how Leftists are treating Israel right now. We have to encourage Muslims to feel free to express their opinions, even if we disagree with them, and show them love. As the late Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” If we want to end hostilities towards Muslims (or any group for that matter), we must start by mending fences.

Of course, once those fences get blown up by people who prefer to kill us than be neighborly, only three words need to be uttered.

Game on, bitch.

Extremist Makeover: The Vice Presidency

Hey, kids, and welcome to a segment I’d like to try out and see if people like it. If so, I’ll try to do one of these every so often if only to give me an excuse to do something other than Leftist Lexicon entries. If not…well, I may still do it anyway because I’m a stubborn asshole.

Either way, I feel a bit of explanation is in order. Throughout my time on the Interwebs, I’ve been called a right wing extremist more often than I can remember, so for the purposes of a 2000s callback, I’m going to lean into it for the purposes of this sketch.

Remember those TV shows where they revamp a home and make it better than it was? I’m going to apply that same mindset to different topics that come to mind in the hopes of entertaining you and maybe, just maybe, giving you a new perspective. Or failing that, give you another reason to send me hate mail. With that being said, let’s get into this edition’s Extremist Makeover.

At one time, a President’s Vice President was as important a pick as the name at the top of the ticket. But after the past few elections, the Vice President has become less relevant than the footnotes of a Media Matters hit piece. Aside from a few Constitutional and ceremonial duties, the Vice President doesn’t actually do very much. If he or she is doing a good job, you typically don’t hear about him/her because, let’s face it, it’s a boring job.

And it’s not like it’s a lock for a better job. The last Vice President who got elected President was Puddin’ Head Joe, and neither of his stints were all that memorable. Anymore the Vice Presidency is a safeguard for the President because nobody wants to see that person with access to the nuclear codes. Think I’m wrong? Take a look at this list of less than luminaries.

George H. W. Bush – sorta wimpy, hates broccoli and the laps of Japanese leaders

Dan Quayle – young guy, bad speller

Al Gore – the archetype of every “typical white man” joke ever told

Dick Cheney – Wilfred Brimley with a shotgun

Joe Biden – an incompetent dumbass whose resume in the private sector is lighter than a supermodel’s snack

Mike Pence – what would happen if mayonnaise gained sentience and assumed human form

Kamala Harris – someone I wouldn’t trust on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan

And these are the Vice Presidents of the winners of the Presidency. The losers are far less impressive.

Let that fact roll around in your brains for a minute.

Clearly, the Vice Presidency has lost its luster, so how do we (or more specifically, I) fix that? Given the propensity of the Vice President to be the one voted Most Likely To Drool On Themselves from their respective high schools, it may not be in our power to make things better. However, I think we can make the role match the quality.

The Vice President is considered the Second Gentleman or Second Lady in the case of the aforementioned Mrs. Harris. To better align the actual duties of the office with the most appropriate title, I propose the Vice President be called the Second Banana. For people unfamiliar with the term, a second banana is someone who supports the main act, specifically a comedian. Given how much of a joke politics has gotten recently, that’s not too far from the truth as it stands.

Since a second banana is there to support the first banana, there isn’t much expected of him/her, but there are times when the second banana can become a first banana through sheer popularity or excellent performance. That takes a lot of work and competence, which are in short supply in Washington, DC, these days. If the Second Banana wants to be considered for a spin-off (i.e. the Presidency), he or she is going to have to show the ability to carry it instead of just assuming it’s a done deal. That’s how we got “Joey” after “Friends” went off the air.

In short, changing the Vice President to the Second Banana will help bring about better Presidents while providing us with laughs for years to come!

So, what do you think of this Extremist Makeover? Do you have any ideas for future makeovers? Let me know!

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

To take our minds off the recent fighting in the Middle East, the economic turmoil at home, and the possibility of another season of anything involving the Kardashians, let’s read a book. That is, if those evil mean illiterate nasty Republicans let you!

Over the past year or so, parents have been finding out there’s more being taught in schools besides the 3 Rs (which, if you want to get technical, is really an R, a W, and an A), and it’s pissed them off a little bit. Then again, who needs to learn math, English, and science when there’s albino bisexual midget quadriplegic slam poetry to learn?

As a result of these revelations, Republican governors like Ron DeSantis and Kim Reynolds have rolled out what the Left has called “book bans.” Leftists also proudly proclaim “We Read Banned Books” if the Facebook and The Social Media Network Formerly Known as Twitter posts and laminated stickers are any indication. The Right has pushed back saying they’re not book bans because the books are still available, just not to certain students.

So, what’s the truth? As you might expect, it’s a lot more gray than you’d think.

book bans

What the Left thinks it means – efforts by the Right to ban books because they don’t like them and want students to be ill-informed

What it really means – keeping creepy shit out of the hands of those unprepared to deal with the subject matter

Recent American history has not been kind to fans of the written word, such as your humble correspondent. We’ve seen books burned, trashed, destroyed, and otherwise maligned by people whose intentions may have been good on the surface, but were really just the motivations of some crazed dickweed with a Paul Bunyon-sized ax to grind. For a long time, it was the more religiously-bent among us who enjoyed making a bonfire out of Bonfire of the Vanities, but around the 1990s, the Left started getting into the act, not with torches, but with Political Correctness.

It started with Huckleberry Finn, a literary classic that entertained young and old alike since its initial publishing. But when PC became a thing, the book fell into disfavor for its frequent use of a term I won’t repeat here because a) it’s offensive, and b) I’m not Michael Richards. After raising a stink about the word, Leftists sought to remove it from schools to fight racism. Context and time period didn’t matter because even though the words were written several decades before these dipshits were born, they were offended now! And back then, just like today, when something offended them, it had to be eliminated. Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed and the adventures of Huck and Jim were safe.

That’s the kind of book bans the Left doesn’t want us to talk about or acknowledge. They want us to think about the Right burning books or wanting Harry Potter books removed from school libraries because concerned parents think it promotes witchcraft and the occult. While the overt push for book bans is still being done, quiet book bans are also taking place, either through complete disinterest in the subject matter or author or through a shame campaign forcing people to choose between reading some books and being on “the right side of history.” Unfortunately, shame works all too well, especially in today’s society where we’re more narcissistic and status-conscious than ever before. And if it’s not something about Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce, it just ain’t important, amirite?

In the current sense, book bans are being done by both sides, just for different reasons. The Left wants books (and sometimes even authors) memory-holed for not staying in lock step with the current ideology. The Right…well, let’s just say they have a slightly different reason, namely the absolute stuff being passed off as elementary school and young adult literature. Such as Gender Queer, a graphic novel geared towards young adults that shows illustrations of how to give a blow job.

At this rate, the 3 Rs are going to include have to make room for one or two more, such as rimjobs. (Author’s Note: if you don’t know what one is, don’t look it up. Trust me on this.)

And then there is This Book Is Gay, also geared towards middle school students, with mentions of the gay dating site Grindr. (And I must repeat, this is being geared towards middle school students, something definitely not appropriate for anyone under 18.) Having been a middle school student once, I know for a fact I wouldn’t have been ready for that kind of subject matter because I was just getting used to the changes in my own body, as well as the emotional and intellectual maturity going on. Today’s kids are even less prepared than I was to handle it. They may be more accepting of it, but that doesn’t mean they’re ready for it.

As much as I criticize the Right for the crazy shit they do with regards to books, they actually have a point here. To make matters worse for the Left, DeSantis, Reynolds, and others aren’t actually banning the aforementioned books, but rather suggesting they be kept in more appropriate libraries with the option for parents and/or students to request they be checked out from said libraries. And they aren’t prohibiting parents from buying these books themselves.

If that’s a book ban, it has to be one of the shittiest ever.

On the other side of the coin, the Left’s current brand revolves around “cancel culture” so it’s not that much of a stretch to think they’re fine with banning books they don’t like. Just ask J.K. Rowling, once a Leftist darling whose books inspired Leftists to pretend Donald Trump was Voldemort, but then became a pariah for daring to think…women are women and trans women aren’t! How revolting!

Along with Rowling, you can add authors like Ayn Rand, Dr. Thomas Sowell, Larry Elder, Tammy Bruce, and a laundry list of Right-leaning writers who have been removed from Leftist minds by virtue (or in this case vice) of not being Leftists and, therefore, not worth their time. Amazing how the Left’s version of diversity excludes the intellectual kind.

More disturbing to me, however, is the cavalier nature of the Left redefining book bans to include what DeSantis and Reynolds are doing. But, as with most things Leftist, it’s being done for multiple purposes…or is that purposi? Anyway, the point is the Left has a vested interest in painting those parents and politicians who don’t think little Johnny should be learning how to assfuck his best friend along with his ABCs as extremist whackjobs.

The most obvious motivations are political. After all, the LGBTQIA+2R14X-ROCKINTHEUSA community is firmly in the back pockets of the Left, both figuratively and literally, so Leftists want to make them happy. Gotta keep those coffers full, right?

Which leads into another motivation: to create more of the LGBTQIA+APOLLO13CUBS2 community to perpetually keep the coffers full. The Left’s real anger over the book bans isn’t that the books are being banned, but rather that the subject matter of those books and where it’s being placed in public schools got revealed. And they would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for those meddling kids…err…parents. If nobody found out, Leftists would have been able to keep it going and create an assembly line of kids who parrot Leftists squawking points without even so much as a second thought.

Including those who continue to parrot the “Republicans are banning books” lie.

The Left have caught themselves in a trap of their own making. On the one hand, they’re putting these books into public school libraries without telling anyone outside of their ideological and work bubble to ensure they get there. Then, when called out on it, they lie by omission by conflating books like Gender Queer with other controversial, yet far more innocuous, books. But when parents and groups like Moms for Liberty show up to school board meetings and try to read from these books, the board tries to shut them down and Leftists go after the parents. If there’s nothing wrong with the books, why try to silence those who want to share the intellectual wealth, as it were?

Because it’s never about the books themselves. It’s always about the ideology.

I’m of the mindset that the best way to handle controversial topics is to bring them into the light of day. Not only does it offer the best possible way to provide a way forward and foster understanding, it exposes the bad faith actors. Although the Right still has their book banning assholes, the Left is doing their best to keep pace. Blaming Ron DeSantis, Kim Reynolds, or any Republican Governor for taking steps to keep inappropriate subject matter out of the hands of kids not yet ready to process it exposes the bad faith actors on the Left and only serves to make their arguments against said Governors weaker by compassion.

And, no, “because DeSantis is a meanie head” isn’t an argument. Even if you stomp your feet and threaten to hold your breath.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

The Israel-Gaza War has only been going on for a little over a week as of this writing (please check local listings for the number of weeks in your area), but some people are already tired of it. After the shocking reports of casualties in Gaza, provided by Hamas by the way, Leftists started calling for a cease fire. This approach isn’t unusual for Leftists, but as you might guess I’m a little skeptical about the underlying reasons.

And by a little skeptical, I mean a lot skeptical.

cease fire

What the Left thinks it means – a way for both sides of the Israel-Gaza conflict to sit down and talk out their differences

What it really means –  a way for Leftists to give time for Hamas to reload

The purpose of any cease fire is to try to deescalate a violent situation where both sides have something to gain, namely ending the loss of life and property. This only works if both sides are willing to be honest about ending hostilities, though. If one side still harbors the notion the other side should be relegated to history like New Coke or Corey Feldman’s music career, any cease fire will be temporary at best.

Guess which version of events I’m going with here, kids.

I have zero faith in a cease fire working in Gaza, and not just because of who is pushing hardest for it. The Middle East is one big Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch where everyone has access to the pin. All it will take to instigate the next big global war is someone to tug hard enough that the other parties lose their grip. Then, it’s only a matter of time.

Or Newsweek, for that matter.

I would write a series of books about the number of deceptions coming from the Left and the mainstream media (but I repeat myself) just in this first week, but people are already documenting them, so I won’t. Still, there is a fundamental question on the table: why are Leftists working so hard to make the cease fire a thing?

As I noted previously, Hamas is winning the PR war with a healthy assist from the Left and the mainstream media (Is there an echo in here?), so they really don’t have a reason to sit down and work things out with Israel. And, no matter what Israel does, the Left will hold them accountable for all the bloodshed, real or fabricated. That’s not going to make Benjamin Netanyahu want to rush to the negotiating table, either. So, it’s an exercise in futility, which is pretty much on brand for the Left if you really think about it. And I do because I don’t have a life.

But what I do have is an insight on the calls for cease fire. It’s not to broker a peace agreement between Hamas and Israel because neither side has an incentive to negotiate. Hamas is winning the PR war, and Israel is winning the actual war, you know with the bombs and stuff. And with the existing hostilities in that region, peace between the two sides would be impossible until one side is completely depleted. Instead of peace, the motivations behind the cease fire requests come from a much darker, more partisan place.

The Left agrees with Hamas on the state of Israel.

Leftists love to pull for an underdog, and who could be a bigger underdog in this case than Hamas? Even with Iran’s financial backing and the Left’s desire to carry water on the world stage, Hamas is seen as weaker and Israel is seen as the bully. Pay no attention to the fact this most recent round started because of Hamas, they’re just poor people trying to live their lives in an “open air prison. This stuff is ready-made for puff pieces and a 43 part miniseries by Ken Burns, brought to you thanks to generous contributions from taxpayers…I mean viewers like you.

As long as the Left can make the case Hamas is the victim, they will ride that idea as far as it will take them, and there are more than enough Jewish and Gentile Leftists happy to go along for the ride. Any inconvenient details are swept under the rug, and every infraction by Israel from destroying homes to having an overdue library book at the Library of Alexandria will get blasted all over the place. In order to keep that notion in motion, the war has to continue, and ironically it’s a cease fire that will allow that to happen.

Remember what I said earlier about how any negotiations where one party wants to eradicate the other was bound to fail? The sad thing is the Left’s idea of a cease fire is designed to fail. By even pausing the fighting for a day or two, it allows other parties (I’m looking at you, Iran) to supply their side with more money, arms, and recruitment tools to keep the war going. And with greater pressure being put on the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration to push for a cease fire from Congressional leaders and staffers, there’s a chance we could see us cut back on the money and arms going to them. But don’t worry! Puddin’ Head Joe already has an idea about where they could go! [link] But that bad idea is a blog post for another time.

Meanwhile back at the war, there are people on both sides who are caught in the crossfire of combat, and I’m not talking the one between Israel and Hamas. I’m speaking of the ideological conflict at play here. The Left’s desire to stick up for the underdog, regardless of how horribly they act, will ensure Hamas will keep fighting a proxy war the Left is afraid to fight themselves. After all, they might not have a working Starbucks in Gaza, man!

To be fair, the Left and the Right are on equally bad footing when it comes to sending people to war on their behalf, but lately it’s been the Left that’s been beating the war drums like a Buddy Rich solo. Mainly, I think it’s because the Left has come around to the use of force to advance ideological goals. That, and they’re cowards. Nevertheless, as long as the Left has even some semblance of power, they will attempt to make people come around to their line of thinking, one way or another.

Now, for the part the Left hasn’t considered. Hamas doesn’t like us, either. Oh, they’ll gladly take our money and assistance in whitewashing their reputation, but they’re just not into us. In fact, they want us gone, too. So, in other words, the Left is siding with our enemy.

Again.

At least we know the Left is committed to recycling, albeit with bad ideas.

And the cease fire is not just fully in the bad idea camp, it’s become a camp counselor. The Left doesn’t want to solve the problems in Gaza so much as exploit them for political gain. But there is a drawback: when people start seeing the puppet strings, you can’t make the strings disappear. Eventually, people will start looking at who is pulling the strings and drawing conclusions, and that’s not going to end well for the Left.

Maybe we can offer them a cease fire…

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week


In case the 25/8 (because Common Core math) news cycle hasn’t talked about it enough, there’s a bit of a war going on in the Middle East between Israel and Hamas. Seems some members of Hamas decided to attack an Israeli music festival on the 50th anniversary of the Yom Kippur War. This attack left several dead, and others held hostage.

Since then, Israel has been fighting back, which has garnered a schizophrenic response from the Left. Oh, the usual suspects on both sides of the conflict have made statements or in some cases like Rep. Rashida Tlaib waited a while before issuing an incredibly tone-deaf response. But the Left is of two minds on the subject, and both of them are more critical of Israel than of Hamas.

Since Hamas is the elephant in the war room right now, I figured it’s time we give equal attention to them.

Hamas

What the Left thinks it means – Palestinians fighting to regain the country they lost to Israel

What it really means – a terrorist cell given international legitimacy by fucking idiots

Hamas started out as the political side of your friends and mine, the Muslim Brotherhood, in Gaza. You know, where the strip is. And where there is an ongoing land struggle between Israel and the Palestinians. Think the Hatfields and McCoys but with a greater possibility for nuclear fallout. Palestinians have had settlements on the Gaza Strip for years, and Hamas has made it a point to attack Israel through various means, which meant Israel responded with force and, in doing so, made Leftists throw their intellectual heft being the Palestinians.

Granted, it’s not much, but it’s something.

Of course, the Palestinians love us for…oh, wait, they hate us because we insist on helping our ally in the region, Israel, defend itself against outside forces wanting to destroy it. You know like…Hamas. And that hate isn’t exclusive. No, Hamas is totally inclusive in wanting as many Americans dead as possible, too, up to and including America’s destruction. With friends like these, who needs enemas?

Well, I can tell you one person who needs one to get his head out of his ass, and that’s Puddin’ Head Joe. Remember this is the guy President Barack Obama tapped as his Administration’s foreign policy guru because…we’re not sure yet, but I’m sure it had something to do with being on the Senate Foreign Relations Committee since God took a day off. The previous record holder, of course, was Strom Thurmond, who beat Puddin’ Head Joe by six days.

And thanks to Puddin’ Head Joe, Hamas has a new sugar daddy: Iran. See, back in the 70s, America froze Iranian assets in response to Iran taking American hostages, and that freeze was in place until…Obama and Puddin’ Head Joe came on the scene. After making a foreign policy blunder that even Ray Charles could see (because, you know, he’s dead and all), we turned $6 billion over to the Iranians…who then said they would do what they wanted with the money, which was to give it to Hamas to attack Israel, only to pull it back shortly after offering it. Fucking brilliant!

Now, when you consider Hamas is fond of using primitive weapons against Israel so they can appear to be the victims (with the help of Leftists in the media, but I repeat myself), that $6 billion might last Iran and Hamas a while. When you are winning the PR war, you don’t need tanks and bombs. You just need to convince as many people as possible that the other side is bad and you’re just fighting for all the right reasons.

Hmmm…where have I heard that before, and not that long ago as it turns out? And to the tune several billion dollars to boot! I’m sure our new international bestie Volodymyr Zelenskyy could tell us in between bouts of counting our…I mean his money.

Of course, Hamas does provide a bit of a problem for Leftists trying to paint them as innocent victims. Namely, that they’re terrorists who treat their own people as badly as they want to treat Israelis. Hamas is notorious for using civilians as human shields and buildings where people are to drive up the body count for their PR war. And the Leftists eat it up like it was a responsibly sourced free range veggie and tofu hot dog.

Which poses another problem for Leftists: how do they walk the fine line between being anti-Israel and still shilling for Jewish donor dollars. Some like the members of The Squad try to play both sides with vague statements that downplay the seriousness of what’s going on while showing support for those poor Palestinians. Others don’t even pretend to hide their contempt for Israel, which puts them in direct conflict with Leftists who still hold onto the notion Israel should exist (if only to keep getting Jewish donations).

Regardless, Hamas is a real problem for us, albeit one a few well-placed rocket attacks could remedy…provided we get the courage to do it. After the War on Terror, many Americans lost their taste for fighting terrorism or even calling it out when it’s blatantly obvious. This is because the Left has done a masterful job in controlling the narrative and removing the stigma from being a foreign terrorist by calling anyone who sees the screamingly obvious racist.

Except when it comes to domestic terrorists. But that’s a bullshit narrative for another time.

Which brings us to another bullshit narrative, that being how cold-blooded Israel has been with the Gaza settlements. Not that Leftists would give us the whole story, but Israel gave the settlers a 24 hour window before they started a counter-offensive to allow time for Palestinians to flee to safety. Those bastards!

Seriously, this should tell you a lot about how Israel treats Palestinians who aren’t trying to kill them. These Palestinians have positions in the Israeli Parliament, enjoy economic and personal freedoms, and generally have a better life than they would under Hamas. And that’s one of the real tragedies in this war. The fact so many Palestinians are being used as pawns in a war between Hamas and Israel on both sides of the conflict doesn’t exactly make humanity look that good. Even so, a Palestinian has a better chance at a better life within Israel than an Israeli or even a non-Hamas Palestinian has. Israel has a ways to go, but they’re already further down the road than Hamas.

And let’s not make the same mistake Leftists make and lump Palestinians and Hamas together. Not every Palestinian is connected to Hamas, nor should we think that way. Unfortunately in this case, most of the people living in the Gaza Strip support Hamas in this conflict. Even so, just like when the Left tries to justify illegal immigration by painting them all as asylum seekers or women and children, they do that as a means to appeal to our emotions.

Because the facts make Leftists look like assholes on a much grander scale.

In the meantime, Hamas is still out there, but they’re finding out after fucking around with Israel. Until one side is wiped out or the two sides can forge a more positive outcome together, we’ll be seeing more of this Mass Warfare Tango for years to come.

Let’s just say I’m more hopeful the Sweet Meteor of Death hits us in 2024 than I am the Hamas-Israel fight ending anytime soon.








Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

You may not have known this, but we were on the brink of disaster on October 1st. While most people’s minds are focused on Halloween, which is a holiday where scary fun can be had by all. But Leftists focused on this recent scary date where the government could have shut down. To a Leftist, that concept is scarier than every “Saw” movie combined.

When there’s even a hint of a government shutdown, Leftists lose their minds and start coming up with all sorts of doomsday scenarios. Our military will be scaled back, leaving us defenseless. Old people won’t get their monthly checks, causing them to starve and die. Worst of all, though…”The View” might get renewed for another season!

But if it weren’t for the actions of some plucky political officials, we would be running around with pollution everywhere, cities on fire, and utter chaos. In other words, San Francisco on any given day.

Since the can got kicked down the road until mid-November, we have some time to relax and think more about what a government shutdown actually means.

government shutdown

What the Left thinks it means – holding the country hostage fiscally so a group of right wing extremists get what they want

What it really means – an exercise showing how bloated the federal government has gotten and what can/should be cut without affecting our everyday lives

In the interests of transparency, I am a small government advocate. I know! Shocking, isn’t it? The reason for my position is pretty simple: a smaller government is an accountable government. Right now, Congresscritters can pass whatever bills they want so full of pork both the B’nai B’rith and Muslim organizations reject it on religious grounds. Try pulling that shit when the only thing between you and an angry mob is a receptionist’s desk.

Since I seem to be in the minority on this, I’ve come to understand why some people want a larger government. I don’t like it, but I understand it. And it really comes down to one thing: people today want to be ruled rather than governed. It’s easier to let someone else tackle the big stuff so we can go back to obsessing about pumpkin spice this and TikTok that and celebrity gossip the other thing. Keeping informed is just too hard, guys! And it’s boring! So, why not just let the government run everything so we can focus on the really important stuff?

Because, ladies and gentlemen, we’re being run by powerful idiots who make bad decisions on the regular. Like not having an actual budget for, oh, decades now. That’s right! Our federal government has not passed a budget since 1996. The way we’ve kept the lights on in Washington, DC, has been through either Continuing Resolutions (basically a legislative method to kick the can down the road in the hopes someone else will pass a budget) or through omnibus spending bills (basically a legislative method to kick the can down the road in the hopes someone else will pick up the tab for their expenditures).

In short, we’re fucked. And neither the Left nor the Right have any plans to unfuck us. But only one side really goes out of its way to turn their collective fiscal irresponsibility into a horror show where everyone is a victim. I’ll give you three guesses, and all three are “Leftists.”

See, Leftists have this unshakable faith in the government as the source of all good in the world. If the government doesn’t do a particular task, Leftists will find a way to wedge the government in there, which creates layer upon layer of bureaucracy. And over time, that bureaucracy grows and becomes more essential to the task until the two are permanently stuck together like my fingers when I try to use Crazy Glue.

And with that Amazing Colossal Bureaucracy comes job opportunities for Leftists, as well as money from said government drones and power over the rest of us. So, when there’s the threat of the government shutting down, it starves the bureaucracy and curtails the power it wields. To the Left, that’s the worst possible thing that could happen. To me, it’s threatening me with a good time.

It should be pointed out government shutdowns have become a political football for the Left and the Right for the past several years. Of these, 13 occurred under a Republican President, while the remaining 8 happened with a Democrat in the White House. Although both major parties shared the blame early on, Republicans took the majority of the blame for the more recent shutdowns because, well, the Left told us they were to blame and enough people believed them.

And because they were right, even if only half so. Both parties are to blame for not being able to pay the country’s bills, mainly because they’re the ones running up the budget to pay for things like non-existent aircraft, wrenches and toilet seats that cost more than the GDP of most of Africa, and really stupid expenditures.

Like more money going to Ukraine.

Yes, kids, the House Democrats weren’t willing to bend much on sending more money to a country we’re supporting in a war between two countries where their leaders are corrupt, dishonest men. Meanwhile, House Republicans wanted money to go towards disaster relief because, as the residents of East Palestine and Maui will tell you, the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration hasn’t done jack shit to help them.

Whenever government shutdowns loom larger than Michael Moore’s shadow, both sides always call for “clean bills,” which is a euphemism for “a bill that pays for everything we want while fucking over the other side.” Between that and the complaints about how many pages the proposed spending bill is, it’s amazing anything gets done at all because both sides would rather play chicken with our tax dollars than come up with an actual budget to constrain costs as much as any federal budget can.

But in the end, both sides know a government shutdown is more theatrical than fiscal. The Left will run sob story after sob story about some lower level drone who won’t get paid and, thus, will go hungry. The Right will complain about how little was cut, but how they had to surrender like the French when there was a minute amount of pushback from the Left.

And the rest of us go on living life as normal for the most part. I’ve been alive for each of the government shutdowns I mentioned above, and not once have the doomsday scenarios painted by the Left ever happened. Even the longer ones didn’t affect most people.

That’s one of the dirty secrets of government shutdowns: the programs the Left always paint as being on the verge of collapse due to the shutdown are usually scheduled to be paid without interruption. And the government employees who lose their jobs when there’s a shutdown? They still get paid after the fact.

Which means…it’s all a show that we’re paying for, but not really enjoying. So, like “Two and a Half Men” on demand, only without the demand part.

The thing to remember whenever a government shutdown is threatened is most people know how to get by even better without the government than they do with it. This may be my small government bias talking (or just common sense), but the fact we don’t need much government should tell both sides maybe we don’t need to spend so much on their services. But that would mean they would have to willingly give up the money and power they get by having the government’s tentacles in every aspect of our lives, sometimes several times over.

Anything short of a full scale fire-and-rehire movement on Capitol Hill won’t prevent a government shutdown going forward. However, I do have a way for us to save some money doing something both sides like to do, but don’t like to admit.

That’s right. Outsourcing Congress to India.

At this point, anything’s worth a shot.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

As we get older, we tend to reminisce about our younger days and the great times we had. Whether it was sock hops, sit-ins, snorting lots of cocaine, or spending quarters in a Pac Man machine, we look back fondly and even wish we could go back. But there are some things that should be left in the past and buried under all the copies of the Atari 2600 ET game.

Unfortunately for us, one such thing has come back, thanks to the Federal Communications Commission. Yep, I’m talking about net neutrality, the only thing standing between order and chaos online (at least in the Leftist hivemind). And thanks to the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration, it’s trying to make a comeback.

So, what exactly is the New Coke/Crystal Pepsi of online endeavors and why is it coming back? Prepare for a journey into the absurd!

net neutrality

What the Left thinks it means – a necessary tool to hold internet providers accountable

What it really means – a way of making internet service shitty for everybody

Net neutrality on paper is simple. In theory, it makes sure providers aren’t treating customer’s differently because of the amount of internet they use. All content, whether it be a Facebook post or a lengthy documentary on Netflix would be treated the same, even if the former uses 100 times more bandwidth than the Netflix user.

Now, internet providers, being capitalists and, thus, not complete economic dumbasses, see traffic as potential revenue streams and seek to maximize the number of people who are using their service whenever possible. You know, like every other fucking business on the planet? As a result, providers started limiting the usage of some high-level users so others could use their service, a practice called “throttling.” The ethics of throttling can be debated, but what can’t be debated is the effect net neutrality will have on internet providers.

Just like when Leftists talk about economic justice or climate justice, the goal is to create equality by fiat rather than cooperation. Internet providers are in it to make a buck, and thank God or Bill Gates or Al Gore for it. As the technology has spread further into the global consciousness, internet access has gone from a “neat to have” to a “need to have” in people’s minds. Why else do you think teenagers today have emotional breakdowns over losing their phones? After all, they need to let the world know what shoes they wore to school today or what dance they learned off TikTok. You know, really important shit!

To that end, the Left has slowly been working on making internet access a utility or, in some cases, a human right. That’s not because they give two shits about poor people having internet; it’s because it makes the argument for government intervention easier.

The federal government, at least in theory, is charged with protecting its citizens and their freedoms as guaranteed by the Constitution. As we’ve seen with the southern border, though, that’s a theory that doesn’t stand up to current scrutiny. Regardless, elevating the service that brings us Nigerian princes, penis enlargement pills, and hot Ukrainian women who want to date American men to an essential part of life brings in the expectation of the government to rally for and provide for this need. Hence, net neutrality becomes the back door to making that a reality.

Which has been the plan all along. The problem the Left has with the internet as it stands right now is they don’t control it. After all, what good is free speech online if the Left can’t control it, amirite?

Now, if net neutrality were actually effective, we might have an issue on our hands. Fortunately for us and anyone else who thinks government intervention in the internet works about as good as a Crocs diving helmet, we don’t yet. A recent poll by RealClear Opinion Research shows Leftists are still in the minority when it comes to stifling free speech, but only by 6%. As demographics and mortality rates change, that number is most likely going to get tighter.

When that happens, net neutrality will be realized, regardless of how effective it is. And if you thought Twitter under the Leftist hivemind was bad, wait until these same dumbfucks take over the internet as a whole.

Of course, what we on the “fuck net neutrality” side have going for us is the speed at which technology changes versus the lack of speech at which legislation and regulation changes. To put it mildly, even the most tech-savvy Leftists on Capitol Hill are subject to the whims of Representatives and Senators so old they used to exchange phone numbers on cave walls beside drawings of their last mastodon hunt. And these old-timers aren’t necessarily going to push for something they barely understand and the new blood can’t explain well enough to bridge that gap.

In my lifetime, we’ve gone from dial-up internet where 28.8 baud modems were the cutting edge to fiber optic and satellite internet service cropping up like dandelions in a Midwest lawn. Right now, the pro-net neutrality crowd hasn’t caught up to the current tech, which puts any efforts to make net neutrality a thing at a great disadvantage. When technology can be obsolete by the time you put it on a credit card, the glacial pace of government means their solution will be light years behind the technology it’s supposed to regulate.

Fucking brilliant!

Even so, we can’t fall asleep at the switch on net neutrality because the Left will continue to find ways to make it a thing. Whether it’s an appeal to emotions, an overstated sense of urgency to save the internet, or the Left’s favorite method of persuasion (outright lying), the arguments the Left will roll out will appeal to the uninformed. Which, oddly enough, will appeal to other Leftists more than anyone else, but that’s neither here nor there.

Still, it won’t hurt to bring up a fact the Left wants memory-holed: they predicted the death of the internet if net neutrality wasn’t in place.

How’s that working out for you, net neutrality fans?



Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

Typically, I prefer to discuss ideas rather than people here on the Lexicon. For one, talking ideas doesn’t lead to fractured relationships, hurt feelings, and getting called a heartless asshole. For another, ideas can’t lawyer up and sue me for shit. But there are times when a person stands up and demands you pay attention to him or her.

So, welcome to the Leftist Lexicon, Senator John Fetterman!

John Fetterman

What the Left thinks it means – a capable Democrat Senator fighting for the working man

What it really means – an incapable Democrat Senator appearing to fight for the working man when he isn’t fighting in stupid slap fights

Although you might not know it from his manner of dishevelment… I mean dress, Fetterman’s story is one of relative privilege. He attended Albright College, a private college in Pennsylvania, where the most recent tuition will set you back a cool $27,560 per semester. Oh, but they offer financial aid, so it totally makes it not an overpriced shithole where you only need a 3.05 GPA to be accepted!

For you Leftists out there and Senator Fetterman, that was sarcasm.

After receiving an MBA from the University of Connecticut and a Master of Public Policy from Harvard, Fetterman went into the insurance business, a pretty lucrative career because people will always do stupid shit. Then, he made the jump into politics, which has proven to be more lucrative because people will always ask him to do stupid shit and pay him money to do it. Starting out as the Mayor of Braddock, PA, Fetterman made a name for himself.

Not in a good way.

But that didn’t stop him! He was Lt. Governor and later ran for the US Senate in 2022, beating out Dr. Mehmet “Not the Wizard of” Oz, who was backed by former President Donald Trump. (More on that later.)

Since his election to the Senate, Fetterman has taken up a number of Leftist causes, but he’s still fighting for the working class! He even caused a stir recently due to his propensity to dress like he’s about to mow his lawn instead of representing the state of Pennsylvania. As a result of Republican complaints, that stalwart of decency Sen. Charles “Amy’s Lesser Known Relative” Schumer relaxed the Senate dress code so Fetterman could continue to look like a bum while getting paid a king’s ransom. Fetterman went so far as to make a deal with the “jagoffs in the House”: support Ukraine and not shut down the government and he’ll wear a suit on the Senate floor.

Hope you like what you elected, Pennsylvania.

Actually, that’s a bit harsh. There is plenty of blame to go around, from Dr. Oz being such a bad candidate Hillary Clinton sued him for plagiarism, to Donald Trump, who endorsed Oz over other more viable (and easily more articulate) candidates because…fame equals electability, I guess? Regardless of who you or I blame, the point is Fetterman is a Senator.

And a sham.

Pennsylvania has a blue collar reputation, earned from decades of hard working men and women in the steel industry and other such work-intensive jobs. And they can sense a bullshitter a mile away…usually. In this case, Fetterman convinced enough people to ignore his privileged past and just focus on him being one of them. He sounded the part (i.e. the previous Tweet with the word “jagoffs”), he looked the part, and he supported a $15 per hour minimum wage. He issued a press release supporting striking members of the United Auto Workers and even flew to Michigan to join the picket lines.

But it’s all an act. He’s going through the motions and saying the right things to keep his image of an everyman intact. All he has to do is hate the right people and things (i.e. the rich), and he’s set for life. Just like any other Senator today.

Although many others have commented on Fetterman’s mental faculties taking a hit since he had a stroke in 2022, I’m going to refrain from mocking that. First, it’s tacky. Fun, but tacky. Second, making fun of his issues will only help him appear to be a victim. That’s right, kids, Mr. Big Tough Average Joe plays the victim card like a blackjack dealer on truck stop speed working straight commission because…people made fun of him! Oh the horror!!!!!

Someone get Fetterman a fainting futon, stat!

That doesn’t speak well of Fetterman in the character department because it shows his willingness to exploit personal frailty for political gain. Sure, it’s funny when he garbles his words to the point Kamala Harris looks like William F. Buckley in the erudite speaking arena, but behind the verbal stumbles and occasional mental short circuits lies a man who is playing voters like a Stradivarius.

And if current approval ratings among Democrats are any indication, Fetterman is Itzhak Perlman in gym shorts.

But the same poll that shows Fetterman’s popularity with his own party also shows he’s not as well liked at home. I can only speculate as to why, but it’s clear Fetterman’s new Senator smell might be wearing off, leaving the odor of the Ghost of Cheeseburgers Past lingering in the air. Whether that will continue until he’s up for reelection in 2028 is also a matter of opinion. In the meantime, Pennsylvanians will have to get used to being represented by someone who looks like he could be asking you for spare change.

More to the point, however, John Fetterman is on the level of the Socialist Socialite as far as effectiveness: not very. But when you’re a Leftist darling, you can practically do no wrong until you fall out of favor. Just ask Cindy Sheehan, Kyrsten Sinema, and Bob Menendez. Although you might want to ask that last one sooner rather than later because he might be heading to prison soon. So, as long as Fetterman does what he’s told to do and attack those the Left want attacked, he should be fine.

Which fucking sucks because he’s so incompetent I’m surprised he hasn’t been tapped to be in the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration.




Quick Hits


I’m sorry there wasn’t a Leftist Lexicon entry this week. There were so many topics and not enough time to devote to delving into them. I don’t want to do a half-assed job of it, considering that’s what I do already. If I half-ass my usual half-ass job, you’re only getting a quarter-ass, and that’s not good enough. If I’m going to half-ass something, I’m going to half-ass it all the way, baby

To make up for the lack of a Lexicon entry, I’m bringing back one of my Quick Hits segments where I give my opinions on topics that are interesting (at least to me), but may not be able to be developed into a full blog post. Hope you enjoy!

GOP on Abortion – The Left has been talking about how Republicans can craft a winning message on abortion now that Roe v Wade has been relegated back to the states. And from what I’m hearing, some Republicans want the next President to do something on the federal level to protect babies in the womb.

Ummm…that’s what Roe v Wade was, kids. The Supreme Court just sent abortion rights back to the states and you asshats want to bring it back to the federal level? That’s proving what the pro-baby-death…I mean reproductive rights crowd said about you right. Don’t give them such an easy W.

The War in Ukraine – It’s still going on, and we’re still on the hook for billions of dollars until, well, we get tired of being Ukraine’s sugar daddy. People are starting to figure out there’s more to the Ukraine-Russia conflict than democracy. Namely, a lot of money for politicians who would love nothing more than to keep Ukraine in the fight if only to hide the covert business dealings.

During the second Gulf War, Leftists chanted “No blood for oil.” Now these same Leftists are practically chanting “All the blood for 10% for the Big Guy.”

UAW Strike – The big three automakers watched as members of the United Auto Workers union walked off the jobs due to the companies not meeting union demands. Among the union’s demands were a 40% pay raise over 4 years with an immediate raise of 20%. As someone who hasn’t seen more than a single-digit raise in, oh, ever, a 20% hike is impressive…in its stupidity.

Look, I know the Big Three made record profits, but that doesn’t make it automatically yours, regardless of what Puddin’ Head Joe tells you. Before you start holding out your hands expecting the Big Three to shower you with money, think about the expenditures side of the ledger. If I make $1 billion in profit and I spend $900 million of that to expand my business or make necessary adjustments to existing worksites, the profit side goes down a bunch. How are the Big Three spending these record profits? Until you can answer that question, don’t look for me on the picket lines.

Another union demand was a cost of living increase to match inflation. You know, the inflation created in large part by the idiots they helped elect in 2020?

And speaking of one of those idiots…

the Biden impeachment – Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy announced the initiation of an inquiry into whether Puddin’ Head Joe broke the law via influence peddling through Joe’s crackhead son, Hunter. (More on him later.) Well, the Left broke out the “sham impeachment” talk early and often, stating there was no evidence Puddin’ Head Joe broke the law. And they’re right…if you ignore all the evidence that literally exists.

But I will have to say the Left knows what a sham impeachment looks like, considering they did two of them to former President Donald Trump.

gun rights in New Mexico – After recent shootings in her state, New Mexico Governor Michelle Lujan Grisham issued an executive order banning the right to carry, citing a public health emergency. As you might imagine, this went over as well as the Botulism Special at Chipotle. Here’s how fucked up it got: Rep. Ted Lieu and poster boy for gun control David Hogg said Lujan Grisham was full of shit.

Since her initial fuck-up and subsequent doubling down, Lujan Grisham has amended her original order to restrict the right to carry only in public parks and playgrounds. And she vowed to keep looking for a way to make her fuck-up legal.

I’d wish you luck, Madam Governor, but I really don’t want to.

Elon Musk and Starlink – In their quest to make themselves look even more like their party mascot, the Left let their hate boner for Elon Musk get the better of them again as it relates to the Russia-Ukraine war. Seems there’s a groundswell of Leftists calling out Musk for…not letting Ukraine use his technology for their military gain. That bastard!

While the Left keeps trying to make the case Musk should be arrested for not being Ukraine’s bitch, they’re missing a pretty important concept: it’s his fucking toy! Last time I checked, we still had the right to refuse service in America, and since Starlink is specifically for residential internet use, Musk rightly said no when Ukraine asked to use it for military use. Whenever the government tries to force you to use a product or service, it winds up being a legal battle down the line, one the Left tends to lose.

Can you say “Obamacare” and “mask mandates”? I knew you could.

Muslims and the LBGTQIAABCDEFGHOWMANYMOREFUCKINGLETTERSAREWEGOINGTOADD+ community – The gay rights community has found itself a new opponent to add to the list of the opponents they already have: Muslims. News reports from across the country show more and more Muslims are standing up to the “Gay Mafia” and refusing to knuckle under to their demands. Now, I’m not ready to start praying to Allah, but I have to wonder if the Left ever saw this coming. I mean, it’s not like Muslims have strict religious doctrine surrounding homosexuahhhhhhh yes they do. And it’s not like it’s hidden, either. Even the most permissive Islamic sects aren’t keen on gay rights.

Apparently, those “Coexist” bumper stickers are as deep as the Left cares to go on this topic.

the Hunter Biden blues – Yep, First Fuck-Up Hunter Biden was finally brought up on federal gun charges after only getting a judicial slap on the wrist for what amounts to tax fraud. Of course, if someone from the IRS wants to show me where hookers and blow are tax deductible, I’d be willing to hear him/her out. Even the staunchest pro-gun control Leftists are saying the actual actions Hunter took aren’t usually prosecuted and, thus, are no big deal.

Let that dumbfuckery sink in for a moment. These fucknuckles are the ones who fought for these laws to be put on the books in the first place, but now that the President’s son is the one caught breaking the law, it’s become a race to see who can come up with the shittiest takes to minimize the damage it will do to Puddin’ Head Joe’s reelection campaign in 2024. And without going into too much detail, rest assured the Left sent their best to come up with the worst takes.

If this doesn’t prove the gun control side is motivated by everything but actual safety, nothing will.

a Tale of Four Titties – Politics and sex go hand in, well you know, and 2023 is no different. On the Left, we have Democrat candidate for the Virginia statehouse Susanna Gibson who offered users of a website called Chaturbate the opportunity to see her perform sexually explicit acts for money. On the Right, we have Rep. Lauren Boebert who was caught on surveillance camera getting frisky with her date at a performance of “Beetlejuice.”

Guess which one the Left and the media (but I repeat myself) have been talking about more. Spoiler Alert: it’s Boebert.

Regardless of where you come down on the political spectrum, we’re coming into an age where this type of sexual shit is going to become more prevalent, and being prudish (or faux prudish for political means) isn’t going to make people act better. The sooner we come to terms with the fact adults like to fuck other adults, the sooner we can move onto more important issues, like how to unfuck our economy. Grow up, people!

And last, but certainly least…

Meet the Press boycott – It was a new era on television, as Kristen Welker took over the failing political news/talk show “Meet the Press” this week. And who was one of her guests? Donald Trump.

Well, let’s just say the Left wasn’t happy Welker gave the former President a platform by which he could…talk about his ongoing 2024 Presidential campaign. See, Leftists (who are totes pro-freedom and not at all fascist) have been trying to find a way to disqualify Trump from running again, and they saw the sit-down interview as a slap to their collectivist faces. And now, these Leftists are going to boycott the show…even if all 14 faithful viewers won’t notice the difference.

And if the power goes off in the coma section of the hospital, that number is gonna drop hard.


Well, I hope you enjoyed this brief look at the wonderful wacky world of American politics, law, and culture. See you soon!