In the aftermath of the electoral fiasco that was the 2024 election, Leftists have been trying to figure out why they lost so many male voters to the Evil Orange Man. And after some soul-searching and thoughtful consideration, they’ve devised a plan to win them back.
Just kidding! They’re spending $20 million on a program called SAM, which stands for Speaking with American Men. This is a departure from their usual approach, which is BAM: Browbeating All Men. While we see how the Left will fuck this up, let’s take a look at it.
Speaking with American Men
What the Left thinks it means – an effort to attract more male voters to Democrat politicians and movements
What it really means – an Astro Turf movement to try to correct a problem the Left caused
The genesis of this idea came from the same place all great political movements start: luxury hotels. So far, the big brain ideas the Left has come up with are:
– using the online space to appeal to younger men
– study the phrasing used to attract young men in these spaces
– buy advertisements in video games
Wow. It’s a wonder Leftists even have to campaign with brilliant ideas like these, amirite? But at least they’ve figured out what men are, so there’s that.
As anyone who has seen the cratering user numbers of Mastodon can tell you, the online world is incredibly fickle. One day you’re getting millions of interactions with each and every post, and the next you’re lucky to show up in the algorithm. (For the uninitiated, algorithm is what the former Vice President thinks he has when he’s dancing.)
Trying to get people to pay attention to something in this space is tricky. Yes, it’s incredibly easy to get people to act like jackasses on TikTok, but that’s because it’s fucking TikTok. But for every overnight dance craze that loses its popularity before you’re done chewing a stick of Fruit Stripe gum, there are many more that fail to do anything more than make the subject being filmed look like a jackass.
Like Leftists using TikTok to make political commentary.
Being able to get users to pay attention to anything on social media takes more than a strategy and a pretty or handsome face speaking words. It takes a message worth spreading that goes beyond a particular audience. It’s 0ne thing to go viral on BlueSky, which is a highly-moderated Leftist echo chamber to rival the Grand Canyon, and to go viral on the Social Media Platform Formerly Known as Twitter, which used to be a Leftist echo chamber until Elon Musk bought it and…well, we’re still trying to figure out what he did with it, but whatever it was it stopped being a Leftist echo chamber.
And it’s not a matter of the size of the platform, either. Naturally, you’re going to get a longer reach on a platform that has become a daily habit for most people. Leftist social media “influencer” Harry Sisson is on X, TikTok, and Instagram and his posts garner a lot of attention, but it’s all to parrot Leftist squawking points without any intellectual depth. So, naturally, he’s on the right social media platforms for his intellectual prowess. But is Sisson the right person to attract young male voters? Not unless they identify as teenage girls.
In fact, the Left has been trying to find the “white guy whisperer” for a few months now, and they’ve assembled quite the motley crew (and not the musical kind). Here are some of the people who have stepped up or have been pushed into the role.
– Tim Walz, Governor of Minnesota and former Vice Presidential candidate under Queen Kamala the Appointed
– Doug Emhoff, the Second Gentleman under Queen Kamala the Appointed
– David Hogg, gun control activist and possibly former vice DNC chair
– Olivia Julianna, female Democrat social media “influencer”
Wow. With a line-up like that, the only missing piece is Naomi Wolf, who was hired to help Al Gore with his masculinity.
And for any Leftists reading this, I was joking.
The issues the Left have communicating with men have one thing in common: they’re all self-inflicted. The most obvious one is their attitude towards men in general: they fucking suck! Thanks in part to third wave feminism and a healthy disdain for the founding of this country, Leftists have found nothing good in the male of the species. And, speaking as a male, they may have a point. The stereotypical man in Leftist circles is a frat bro, one stage above Cro Magnon but with better cars. They’re uncultured, uneducated, probably drunk, and definitely backwards, but they’re the ones who hold all the power.
Which pretty much describes my opinion of most Congresscritters, but I’m sure that’s purely coincidental.
And when Leftists find someone who doesn’t align with them, they move into harangue-you-into-submission mode. They will shrilly preach about what you’re doing wrong in their eyes, why that makes you worse than literally Hitler, and call you all sorts of names. So, it’s really a mystery why Democrats keep losing the male vote…
Again, Leftists, I’m kidding.
What isn’t a joking matter is the culmination of all of that browbeating and general bitching about men. With male support of Democrats going further south than the border wall, it’s clear the current Leftist model doesn’t work anymore. Men are tired of being told we suck, especially when the majority of us don’t. Even Leftist men are often into causes to get pussy.
Spoiler Alert, guys: It never works. They’ll never fuck you, but they’ll float the idea just enough to keep you from leaving. And there’s nothing you can say or do that will be enough to remove that Rock of Gibraltar-sized block from their shoulders.
Check that. There is one thing: going full Dylan Mulvaney.
And you never want to go full Dylan Mulvaney.
And here’s the funny thing (because it’s about time there’s something funny in this piece). Men really aren’t that complicated. We like simple things, like meat, grilling, and grilling meat. Oh, there’s also booze and women. And maybe fast cars or motorcycles. Oh, and there’s sports.
Come to think of it, men might be more complicated than I think.
Seriously, though, at the heart of every man is four chambers. But aside from that, there’s a need to feel competent at the basics of life. Back in prehistoric times, men were the hunters and gatherers, thus they were the providers. Even though we’ve come a long way since then, the need to provide is hard-wired into men’s psyches. The American Dream was built on that same idea, only with two car garages and white picket fences instead of trying not to be devoured by giant lizards and avoiding tar pits.
In other words, when I was a wee lad.
Leftists overcomplicate this concept (as they often do because to them being confusing is a sign of super-duper intelligence), so they completely miss the answer to their male voting problem. Instead of nagging us to vote for Democrats because reasons, give us a reasoned argument. Or at the very least don’t sound like a harpy when you talk to us. You should have learned that lesson in 2016 after watching Hillary Clinton lose, but apparently you haven’t.
And here’s a fun fact! Many men didn’t vote for Hillary Clinton or Kamala Harris because they’re sexist and racist. It’s because they didn’t like them. And you know why we like someone like Tulsi Gabbard? Because she’s fucking hot!
No, wait, that’s not it. It’s because she doesn’t come at men like we’re the enemy. Her tone and demeanor are much more inviting and she’s more open to having a conversation even if we don’t see eye to eye. You could have a beer with her while grilling steaks and have a great time.
Try imagining Hillary or Kamala in that scenario. Even if you put it in the best AI out there, it would come back and say, “Seriously, what the fuck, Dave?”
While Leftists continue to try to attract men to their causes, they’re going to be met with more failure than Walter Mondale in 1984 until they come to terms with their misandry. Swearing more and studying how men speak will only take you so far, but to me they come off like the “How Do You Do Fellow Kids” meme. If you want to get men back in your political corner, be real.
And from what I’ve seen and heard so far, Speaking with American Men is about as real as William Shatner’s hair.
Tag: kamala harris
A Loss That Could Have Been Prevented
Now that the hoopla over the 2024 election has pretty much died down and the postmortems of the aforementioned election are calming down somewhat (and missing a lot of the points that should have been drawn from it), I wanted to throw my semi-serious hat into the ring and offer a postmortem of a different flavor, one that goes deeper into the Democrats’ 2024 loss than “America is racist and sexist.”
My thoughts? The Democrats would have been in far better shape had Joe Biden lost in 2020.
This seems counterintuitive on its face, but in looking back at the past 4 years, it’s hard to dismiss the possibility Biden winning had more to do with Kamala Harris losing than anything Donald Trump could have done, intentionally or otherwise.
As the poem goes, let me count the ways.
– The blame for the COVID-19 response and any aftermath therein would be firmly on Trump’s shoulders. Would Trump have handled it better? I can’t say for certain, but I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be any worse.
– Trump would have been out of office sooner. Yes, I know Leftists would up in arms about another 4 years of Trump (just look at how they’re handling it today), but in retrospect, they might be willing to put up with it to not have to endure the second Trump Presidency in the here and now. And speaking of which…
– The Democrats would have had more time to find a better candidate than they had. Let’s face it. Kamala Harris was a poor candidate thrust into the role by people whose only strategy was “Orange Man Bad.” At least we would have had a primary process to weed out the bad candidates (Harris) and find other less bad candidates. Which also brings us to…
– Leftist Governors wouldn’t have felt emboldened by President Biden to take the actions they did. This is more of a future-forward thinking point, but the gist is people like Gavin Newsom, Gretchen Whitmer, and Andrew Cuomo (all of whom were seen as rising stars within Democrat circles) wouldn’t have fallen for the trap of overreach because their guy was in power. As a result, Newsom is looking inept as his state burns, Whitmer isn’t even that much of a figure in Democrat circles, and Cuomo should be in prison for his COVID stupidity. With Trump in charge, these three numbskulls would still have some stroke to come out as the anti-Trump in 2024. Now, they’re lucky if they can be named state chairs of their party caucuses.
– Republicans would have had to find a Trump replacement sooner. With Trump’s defeat in 2020, that kept his legitimacy as a candidate on life support. Had he won, the Republicans would have been scrambling to find a replacement that wasn’t Mike Pence. Nice guy, but he’s like tofu and would have been a lot easier to defeat in 2024 unless the GOP found another Trump-like candidate.
– Kamala Harris would have still been a Senator. This works in one of two ways. First, she could have shored up the concept she was a fierce prosecutor within the safety of the Senate chambers, especially after Tulsi Gabbard ate Harris’s lunch and stole her lunch money besides in 2019. Second, she could have built up her leadership resume a bit more. Instead of being the Kamala Harris we got in 2024, she could have studied the ins and outs of political maneuvering from people like Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi to make her minuses look less minus-ey.
– Other potential Presidential candidates wouldn’t have to deal with the fallout from being seen as incompetent under the Biden Presidency. This is more specific to Pete Buttigieg, but it could apply to others. In 2020, Mayor Pete seemed to be confident, competent, and had a good head on his shoulders, thus bridging a gap between the Progressive wing and the Traditional wing of the Democrat Party. While serving as Secretary of Transportation, he showed none of the traits he did as a candidate, including messing up a pretty big disaster in Ohio which made him look incompetent and out of touch. (Not to mention his “breastfeeding” picture that kept him out of sight for about 30 days.)
– There would be no debate over the 2020 election results. Simple logic here. If Biden lost, the MAGA supporters wouldn’t have a place to hang their red MAGA hats on, and a lot of spin, disinformation, and other gobbledygook would have never seen the light of day. Which leads to…
– The “insurrection” wouldn’t have happened. We can debate the facts of what happened on January 6th until Jesus comes back, but the fact is without a Biden win, there would have been no “insurrection.” And as a result…
– There would be no J6 Committee. To put it mildly, the J6 Committee was a farce only one-upped by the way the Department of Justice handled the J6 arrestees. The more we look into it, the more sus things we find out. Imagine not having that around your neck like an albatross! Although I think Adam Schiff’s neck strength would handle it just fine…
– There would be no J6 arrests. Speaking of the DOJ, they did a horrible job respecting the rule of law and even basic Constitutional rights with how they haphazardly doled out punishments, coerced people into confessions that not even the Spanish Inquisition would have cooked up, and held US citizens in jail without being charged with any crimes. Heck, even the charges that were presented weren’t even close to being insurrection.
– The “lawfare” against Trump would have been more effective. Without the protection of the Presidency, Trump and his legal team would have had a much tougher road to hoe to convince judges his claims of immunity were valid, which would have negated or at least delayed the Supreme Court case that gave Trump a “Get Out of Jail Free if You’re the President” card. And I get the feeling that USSC decision is going to come back to bite us all sooner rather than later, but that’s a blog post for another time.
– The 2022 midterm elections would have been more favorable towards Democrats than they were. Granted, there was no “red wave” as predicted by many on the Right, but think of it this way. Americans seem to think a divided government is somehow preferable to the same party controlling the White House and Congress. With all the negatives Trump had at the time, the Democrats would have seen a much more favorable outcome due to the divided government concept and the rising discontent there might have been with Trump.
– The Biden family wouldn’t have been made so public. This covers a lot of ground, including Hunter Biden’s crimes and subsequent pardon, Joe’s mental decline, allegations of Joe showering with a young female relative, the too-frequent gaffes that had to be explained away, and so many more issues both substantial and inconsequential. If Joe Biden lost in 2020, he could have walked off into the sunset and we would have seen him better than he did when he left office.
– The Democrat wouldn’t look like hypocrites when criticizing Trump’s appointees as incompetent. I can’t say for certain, but I get the feeling the vetting process under Joe Biden was “how many minority boxes do you check off” and that was it. From the incompetent to the “how in the heck did you get this job,” the Biden Administration was filled with people who were in way over their heads, but were in charge of some pretty important stuff. Any Democrat who stayed silent when Sam Brinton was running around stealing people’s luggage instead of keeping an eye on nuclear energy should take all the seats before saying anybody Trump appoints is unfit for the job.
– Democrats would have more time to figure out a better message, both in real life and on social media. Let’s face it, folks. Democrats have a weak social media game, and their ground game is antiquated at best. Within four years, they could have spent less time listening to Millennials with a TikTok account and more time at the grassroots level figuring out why their messaging doesn’t resonate as much as it did. The fact a wealthy land developer from New York is now the voice of the working class should embarrass Leftists to no end.
– No Inflation Reduction Act. This one piece of legislation was pretty much the stake in the Harris/Walz campaign’s heart because it showed how out of touch Democrats became. The old saying “all politics is local” is still as relevant as “it’s the economy, stupid,” and Democrats were tone-deaf to both. No matter how much you folks tried to make us believe the economy was doing better than we thought (and calling us stupid if we didn’t agree), it didn’t match with what voters were seeing. It was, and still is, one of the biggest blunders of the Biden Administration.
– The Russia-Ukraine War might not have started. One of the things that stuck in many voters’ craws was the amount of money we were sending to Ukraine to fight off a Russian invasion. In the face of domestic issues like natural disasters, rising inflation, and the economic impact of looting and thievery in major cities, we kinda wanted to know why our money was being sent to a foreign country without question. We can speculate all we want, but in the end, we are still wondering why we’re funding a war overseas. No amount of patriotic bunting can square this circle. Without Biden cutting blank checks to Ukraine, our involvement wouldn’t be so head-scratchingly controversial. Trump ran on not getting us involved in foreign wars, and I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have gotten us involved in Ukraine.
– The “Tech Bros” and Joe Rogan wouldn’t have seemingly moved rightward. Up until recently, Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg , and Joe Rogan among others were consistently left-leaning. But as the Left went further Left, they all had a “come to Jesus” moment and decided to entertain thoughts from the Right. That alone caused Leftists to freak out instead of asking themselves if they were doing something that would make people not associate with the Left anymore. This emboldened others, along with Tulsi Gabbard and Robert Kennedy, Jr., to distance themselves from the Left and break bread with Donald Trump. But at least you still have Harry Sisson…for now.
If you made it this far, thank you for hearing me out. If you haven’t, the Readers Digest Condensed Version is Joe Biden winning in 2020 was the worst thing that could have happened to Democrats on a number of levels. As it stands, we’re now in the timeline where Biden won, which lead to Donald Trump winning and Leftists freaking out over what could have been.
It’s like the old saying: “Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it.”
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
History has a tendency to repeat itself at times when you least expect it. Or, if you pay attention to Leftist rhetoric (which may be against the Geneva Convention, or at the very least the 2024 Shriners Convention), it happens every time a Republican gets into office. And if you’re not paying attention, you will Nazi this coming.
See what I did there?
In the waning hours of the Brick Tamland Administration, history repeated itself when he announced the ratification of the Equal Rights Amendment. This sentiment was echoed by Queen Kamala the Unappointed (see what I did there?), Senator Kirsten “I’m Angela from ‘The Office’ Without the Charm” Gillibrand, and Leftist groups like the Center for American Progress. And just like the previous times the Equal Rights Amendment was at the center of conversation, advocates are proclaiming its necessity to ensure equality between/among the sexes.
Yeah, about that…
Equal Rights Amendment
What the Left thinks it means – a ratified Constitutional Amendment necessary to ensure equality of the sexes
What it really means – an irrelevant Constitutional Amendment that Leftists want to enshrine anyway
Although it’s become a hot topic, the Equal Rights Amendment has a bit of a history. It was first proposed in 1923 as part of the women’s suffrage movement. Eventually, the ERA finally came into being as a proposed Amendment in 1972. The wording is as follows:
Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex. The Congress shall have the power to enforce, by appropriate legislation, the provisions of this article. This amendment shall take effect two years after the date of ratification.
This is where things get a little tricky for the ERA. Although it was passed by both houses of Congress, 38 states still had to ratify it, and there was a time limit placed on it. This time frame expired on June 30, 1982. So, that should be the end of it, right?
Ooooh, sor-ray. The Left continued to push for the ERA to be ratified like they would get an ice cream cone after it happened. Well, that explains why Brick Tamland was hot and heavy to get it ratified. Anyway, Virginia ratified the Equal Rights Amendment in January 2020, barely missing the deadline by…let me check my notes here…almost 40 years. So, so close…
In spite of this, the Left continued to push for the ERA to be ratified because a) the conditions were met aside from the time frame, and b) they really wanted women to have equal protection as men. You know, back when they thought there were only two genders? (And at the break, it’s still Genders 2, Leftists 0.)
On the surface, what the ERA stands for is pretty reasonable and a good step. We love people to be treated equally in theory. These days, though, the practice is situational and only when we’re directly impacted. You know, just like when Leftists support police officers until they don’t? And, surprise surprise, the Left is the same way when it comes to women.
The Equal Rights Amendment has become obsolete because society has changed without it. Today, women occupy many high profile positions in business, politics, OnlyFans, and so on. In some areas, they’ve even surpassed men. Maybe it’s just me, but the fact women have these positions shows the ERA is a non-starter. What more equality do women need that isn’t already covered by laws and society?
The quickest answer for the Left is abortion, or as they call it “bodily autonomy” or “health care.” Or maybe they can just call it infrastructure like they did everything else for a time. But even this fails with a cursory knowledge of recent Supreme Court rulings that made abortion a state issue rather than a federal issue. Then, there’s the logic problem. Abortion laws by definition affect women more than men because…and I can’t believe I have to say this in 2025…MEN CAN’T GET PREGNANT. Equality of rights based on sex can’t apply here because there is no equivalent male counterpart to abortion. Oops.
The wage gap? To my knowledge, there are no laws on the books right now mandating women be paid less than men for doing the same job. What’s more, there are already laws and practices on the books that prohibit it, thus the ERA would be a redundancy like having two Leftists scream about the pay gap when none would suffice.
So, this begs the question of why the Left hasn’t done anything substantive about the ERA since the Reagan era. The simple answer? Leftists don’t really give a fuck about women, just their votes and money. The more complex answer? Leftists need women to be victims, even if it’s self-inflicted victimhood. Challenging the ratification status of the ERA or even coming up with another attempt to ratify it when they had control of both houses of Congress was never a top priority to the Leftists in power. After all, we had to save the rare triple breasted albino puddle jumping raven! And how do I know that bird is rare?
Because I just made it up.
Imagine being a Leftist woman and having your equal rights take a back seat to an animal that may or (probably) not affect the world in any way, shape, or form. That should make any sensible Leftist female (a stretch, I know, but I like to dream) pack up shop, take their pink pussy hats, and look for a non-Leftist man to settle down with. But since they think they’re victims of “The Man” or “The Men” or “The Patriarchy,” they stay firmly planted in the back seat and let other causes take all the attention.
And the ERA is part is the mythical carrot that keeps them there.
But there is another angle that few, if any, have explored: the impact the ERA will have on the trans community. While it’s easy and fun to mock the Left’s inability to follow actual science and conclude most people fall into one gender or the other, there is a perverse genius involved. If we accept the Left’s idea that even genders are more complex than they actually are and that there are more that can be claimed merely with an assertion, it throws a lot of things into question.
Like…oh I don’t know…the Equal Rights Amendment.
Once the Left gets a foothold on a legal matter, they will use it as a catapult for other matters only tangentially related to the original matter. That’s how the gay rights movement went from merely asking to be treated like regular people to “bake the cake, bigot.”
I have no hard data to back this up (aside from the fact the Left abandons women like Leonardo DiCaprio does when they turn 25), but having seen how the Left has used other social issues to push an alternate agenda, I can’t rule out the possibility of the ERA being “ratified” by Presidential fiat being used to further their transgender agenda. Or as I am calling it the transgenda.
See what I did there?
Although the Left is going to call the next steps in the ratification process uncertain, that’s only because they know as much about the Constitution as they do about economics: very little, but they’ll still try to convince you otherwise. The fact remains the Equal Rights Amendment had its shot to be ratified within the time limit Congress set and it wasn’t. No matter how many social media posts or proclamations from current and former political figures get made, the ERA is DOA, and it doesn’t l0ok like the Left wants to do the heavy lifting to make it a priority.
Which is fine by me. I’m not a fan of redundancy except when it comes to my jokes and pop culture references, but it’s clear America has moved past the notion that women have only certain societal roles. Now, we can confidently say women can fuck shit up just as well as men can!
Unlocking the Keys
With all of the post-2024 Election analyses, there’s been a lot of talk about Allan Lichtman’s 13 Keys, the factors he’s used to predict 9 of the past 11 Presidential elections. A lot of talk, but not a lot of analysis, per se. Oh, you had your share of squawking heads on both pointing out how the 13 Keys failed this election, but not a lot of thought as to why.
Well, since I lack hobbies, I decided to do a bit of research and analysis of my own and what I found out might change a few minds.
Before we get into the boring stuff, we have to set our parameters, i.e. know what we’re talking about. After all, this isn’t MSNBC, so we can’t get away with spouting off without having facts.
Lichtman’s Keys are as follows:
Party mandate: After the midterm elections, the incumbent party holds more seats in the US House of Representatives than after the previous midterm elections.
Contest: There is no serious contest for the incumbent party nomination.
Incumbency: The incumbent party candidate is the sitting president.
Third party: There is no significant third party or independent campaign.
Short term economy: The economy is not in recession during the election campaign.
Long term economy: Real per capita economic growth during the term equals or exceeds mean growth during the previous two terms.
Policy change: The incumbent administration effects major changes in national policy.
Social unrest: There is no sustained social unrest during the term.
Scandal: The incumbent administration is untainted by major scandal.
Foreign/military failure: The incumbent administration suffers no major failure in foreign or military affairs.
Foreign/military success: The incumbent administration achieves a major success in foreign or military affairs.
Incumbent charisma: The incumbent party candidate is charismatic or a national hero.
Challenger charisma: The challenging party candidate is not charismatic or a national hero.
Under Lichtman’s model, a successful candidate has to win at least 8 of these Keys. And considering its track record, it would be hard to imagine a scenario where the Keys failed.
This is where things get a little tricky, and where most of the post-election analysis surrounding the Keys stopped. The consensus was the Keys were wrong, which negatively impacts Lichtman and the model itself. However, that’s far too simplistic and inaccurate an assessment. Based on my own analysis, the Keys still work and worked in the 2024 election.
Where the failure occurred is in the interpretation of the data. Whenever you do any kind of social research, there is always a chance one’s personal beliefs can find their way into the analysis of the findings. If you’re not careful, you go from letting the data drive your conclusions to rooting for a particular conclusion and retroactively figuring out how it came to pass.
To be fair, observation bias isn’t limited to the “soft sciences.” There are some prime examples of hard sciences being sucked into the wonderful world of bias. The difference is in the ability to reconstruct the experiment to test the hypothesis further. With hard science, the way to do that is clear, but with soft science, it’s unclear, if not impossible, to reproduce the outcomes. We can set up similar conditions, but the passage of time, the introduction of new information, or even just the possibility of a changed opinion limit the effectiveness and accuracy of the reproduction.
Setting all that aside (because it gets pretty close to migraine-inducing territory for me), the important takeaway is the data is the data. It’s how we interpret it that creates the opening for bias to affect the outcome.
I can’t say for certain Lichtman’s prediction that Vice President Kamala Harris would win 9 of the 13 keys was based on bias rather than a difference in interpreting the data. Prior to 2024, the only other time in recent history that the Keys didn’t accurately predict the outcome was in 2000 when he predicted Al Gore would defeat George W. Bush. His explanation for why the Keys didn’t predict the winner then? Bush stole the election.
That suggests to me he may have a bias issue when it comes to elections he feels strongly about, and he has made it clear he’s not a Trump supporter by any means. Having said that, I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt here and chalk the 2024 election prediction failure to just having an off night. More grace than he deserves? Maybe, but feel free to excoriate me in the comments.
Lichtman’s prediction for 2024 were as follows:
The following nine keys line up in favor of the incumbent Democrats.
Contest Key 2: The Democrats have united in near unanimity behind Harris.
Third-Party Key 4: In recognition of his fading support, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. suspended his campaign. His endorsement of Donald Trump does not impact this key.
Short-Term Economy Key 5: It is too late for a recession to take hold of the economy before the election. The National Bureau of Economic Research, which provides the most reliable assessment of recessions, typically takes a few months to establish that the economy has fallen into a recession (National Bureau of Economic Research, 2020).
Long-Term Economy Key 6: Real per-capita growth during the Biden term far exceeds the average of the previous two presidential terms.
Policy Change Key 7: Biden has fundamentally changed the policies of the Trump administration in areas such as the environment and climate change, infrastructure, immigration, taxes, and women’s and civil rights.
Social Unrest Key 8: Despite sporadic demonstrations, social unrest has not risen to the level needed to forfeit this key: massive, unresolved unrest that threatens the stability of society as in the 1960s and early 1970s.
Scandal Key 9: Republicans in Congress have tried and failed to pin a scandal on President Biden. His son Hunter’s crimes do not count as scandal, which to do so must implicate the president himself and generate bipartisan recognition of wrongdoing.
Foreign/Military Success Key 11: President Biden and Biden alone forged the coalition of the West that kept Putin from conquering Ukraine and then undermining America’s national security by threatening its NATO allies. Biden’s initiatives will go down in history as an extraordinary presidential achievement.
Challenger Charisma Key 13: As explained, Trump does not fit the criteria of a once-in-a-generation, broadly appealing, transformational candidate like Franklin D. Roosevelt or Ronald Reagan.
Seems like a lock, right? Not quite.
I have no dog in this hunt since I didn’t vote for either Trump or Harris, so my analysis shook out a bit differently. Instead of focusing on just the 9 keys Lichtman thought Harris would win, I think a look at all 13 would be helpful.
Here’s what I came up with.
Party Mandate: Although the 2022 midterm elections didn’t quite swing as far right as the GOP would have wanted, the fact remains they regained control of the House of Representatives. On that, Lichtman and I concur. Advantage: Trump.
Contest: Lichtman gave this one to Harris, but the conditions under which she received the nomination makes this a bit harder for me to concede this Key to her. At the beginning of the election cycle, Ms. Harris was still considered to be Vice President, in spite of the thoughts at the time she might be a drag on the ticket. The unity behind her didn’t come together until after the nomination process was truncated and she was allowed to take over for Joe Biden. Trump, on the other hand, went through a primary process where he had challengers of varying degrees of ineptitude. Even with that being the case, the GOP by and large got behind Trump from the outset. Thus, I have to give this one to the GOP. Advantage: Trump.
Incumbancy: Once Joe Biden dropped out, this Key became a moot point. Neither Trump nor Harris could claim this, so neither one would get the advantage from it. No Advantage.
Third Party: There was no significant third party presence in the 2024 election. The closest we had was Robert Kennedy, Jr. No Advantage.
Short Term Economy: Now, we’re getting into the fun stuff! Lichtman was correct when he said there was not a recession in play here. However, that doesn’t automatically mean the economy is strong. We may not have had a recession, but we still had to deal with an economy voters felt was in decline because, well, it was. Even if you consider the drop in the inflation rate to be a step in the right direction, it didn’t resonate with voters. For that reason, I cannot give Harris the nod as Lichtman did. Advantage: Trump.
Long Term Economy: Second verse, same as the first. Advantage: Trump.
Policy Change: Again, Lichtman correctly stated the Biden Administration changed policies put in place by the Trump Administration, which were certainly big, but for the wrong reasons because they were historically bad changes. (Inflation Reduction Act, anyone?) When asked what she would do differently, Harris couldn’t come up with anything, which meant she knowingly or inadvertently signed off on the policy changes Biden made, which were ultimately unpopular. Staying the course when you’re about to hit the rocks isn’t smart in real life or in politics. Advantage: Trump.
Social Unrest: One of the candidates got shot at twice after years of being called a fascist, and the other was Kamala Harris. That tells me there’s social unrest. Advantage: Trump.
Scandal: Sorry, sir, but you think President Biden was devoid of scandal, I have swamp land in Death Valley I’d love to sell you. This was one of the biggest blunders Lichtman had with his 2024 Keys because it ignored one of the biggest stories of last year: Biden’s declining mental faculties. That in and of itself (as well as the media’s cover-up) was a big enough scandal to swing this Key to Trump. Advantage: Trump.
Foreign or Military Failure: That was Joe Biden’s M.O. even back in his Congressional days. As we saw with the mess that was the Afghanistan withdrawal, there was no way for Biden to escape blame for it. And Harris was pretty much either a ghost on the scene or nodded in approval at whatever harebrained idea Biden came up with at the time. Trump didn’t have that problem because, well, he wasn’t Commander In Chief. Advantage: Trump.
Foreign/Military Success: Unless you count making President Volodymyr Zelenskyy of Ukraine super rich, I got nothing. Advantage: Trump.
Incumbent Charisma/Hero: Even if you count Harris as the incumbent, she was a popularity void, as evidenced by the number of people who walked out of her rallies after the musical performances by big-name stars concluded. And Trump wasn’t the incumbent. It’s a wash. No Advantage.
Challenger Charisma/Hero: Say what you will about the man, Donald Trump has charisma and he imposed his will on the Harris campaign. Lichtman got this one completely wrong. Advantage: Trump.
So the final score from my analysis is 10 Keys for Trump, 0 for Harris, and 3 for No Advantage. And considering Trump won the White House, I’d say the Keys worked pretty good once possible bias (and definite missed calls) were accounted for. It may not have been the result Lichtman wanted, but from where I sit, the Keys worked to perfection, even if he didn’t.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
With Donald Trump’s second Inauguration right around the corner, the Left has been acting mature and being deeply introspective about how Queen Kamala the Appointed lost, looking for a better way forward for 2028.
Just kidding! They’re still screaming like little bitches.
But this time around, their shrieking sounds…vaguely familiar. In fact, it was 4 years ago, if memory serves. It’s almost as if the Left…is denying the results of the 2024 election. After all, it’s impossible Trump won the popular vote against someone as beloved as Queen Kamala the Appointed, right?
Well, let’s just say everything old is hypocritical again. Back to the election denial well for another taste.
election denial
What the Left thinks it means – a valid expression of doubt over the results of the 2024 election
What it really means – hypocritical bullshit the Left uses to excuse losing so badly
There’s a popular idea in Leftist circles that Republicans can only win by cheating. That’s going to come as news to those of us who remember the 1984 election, where Ronald Reagan made Walter Mondale his bitch, but that’s not important right now. The point is Leftists have built up a belief they will always win elections unless there’s chicanery.
You know, like the Electoral College?
This time around, the excuses for Queen Kamala the Appointed’s loss are more frequent than my trips to the bathroom after eating Chipotle’s e-coli special. Elon Musk hacked the voting machines. There is evidence of election tampering, which is why the Harris campaign started collecting funds for what they call the “President’s Recount Account.” Trump had Russians call in fake bomb threats to polling places. There are 20 million missing votes. And, because these are Leftists we’re dealing with here, a ton of hashtags.
To be fair, there has been election denial from both the Left and the Right in recent years, but of the two sides, the Left has had the election denial thing on lockdown. But after the 202o election where the President Brick Tamland got more votes than Barack fucking Obama (something I’m still questioning because it makes zero sense), the Left turned their popular electoral pastime into…fostering an insurrection! Yep, if you even sounded like you were questioning the outcome of the most secure election in history (according to the same Leftists saying the 2024 election was stolen), you were on par with those evil, dastardly, no-good, utterly despicable insurrectionists who…let me read my notes here…were mostly peaceful (as opposed to the “mostly peaceful” protests in 2020 where shit got broken and set on fire), with only a handful of asshats who did more than just peaceably assemble.
Well, if that’s the case, better get me a buffalo hat.
Of course, it’s not, but the Left made the rules, so that means I get to call each and every one of them who denies the 2024 election insurrectionists and, thus, subject to jail time and other legal overreactions. I hear Gitmo is nice this time of year…
Seriously, though, we should not be afraid to call bullshit if there’s actual bullshit being presented as truth. To date, I have yet to see any convincing evidence of any of the Left’s election denial, but I have seen some questions about the 2020 election that make it hard to believe it was as legit as the Left wants us to believe. Regardless, the act of denying an election isn’t the second coming of the burning of the Reichstag building. In today’s society where lying is like breathing (especially to the political and media classes), I’m surprised there aren’t more protests over stolen elections. I think the reasons there aren’t are a) the Right all have jobs, and b) the Left are pussies.
More to the point, there are some serious election irregularities that both sides can’t seem to agree are problems. Like the possibility there are some places where there are more votes cast than citizens in those places. Combine these with people who may be voting twice because they have homes in two different states (i.e. snowbirds and college students), ineligible voters, the dead voting in elections, long lines at polling places, electioneering under the guise of handing out free water at polling places, the lack of updated technology, the over-reliance on said technology, the lack of voting machines in some districts, and a general apathy towards voting because of shady shit going on, and we have a powder keg just waiting to be set alight by someone with a Zippo and a bad attitude.
Yet, even with all of this (and the hypocrisy of the Left), it’s hard to point out many examples of actual election denial. We may not like the results, but that in and of itself is not election denial. As long as we aren’t breaking the law, negatively impacting someone else’s rights, or generally being an asshole about it, it’s kosher. And, Leftists, hurt fee-fees don’t count as generally being an asshole, unless we’re talking about you being said asshole.
And I would be remiss if I didn’t point out the sheer hypocrisy of election denial. It’s okay for Leftists to question election results, but not for anybody else? Bullshit! Either you let everybody in on your reindeer games or you can take all the seats. From where I stand, you can definitely take the seats and go over there. No, not there. Still too close. Keep going. I’ll let you know when you can stop.
Okay, now we have our chance. Let’s get out of here!
Leftist Lexicion Word of the Week
Yep, we’re back talking about the 2024 Election again.
Since Donald Trump became the 47th President, the Left has been trying to figure out what went wrong. I have a thought: don’t run Hillary Clinton with a tan on a shitty platform focused on abortion rather than the cost of groceries. And as simple as that is to understand, the Left are still trying to figure out a way to right the DNC Titanic.
One idea that caught on was finding left-wing versions of Joe Rogan and Elon Musk. Spoiler Alert: you had them. They were called Joe Rogan and Elon Musk. But instead of taking a step back and realize running on bat-shit insane policies, they’re trying to find a way to reach out to white men.
Enter Dean Withers, affectionately called “the Bro Whisperer.”
Hoo boy. This one’s gonna sting, kids.
the Bro Whisperer
What the Left thinks it means – a way for the Left to reach out to young men to persuade them to vote Democrat
What it really means – proof positive the Left still doesn’t know what the fuck they’re doing
Leftists have had a pretty significant footprint (carbon or otherwise) in the mainstream media. Most major newspapers, the three networks, PBS, and some online spaces such as Facebook and YouTube. Even the Social Media Network Formerly Known As Twitter had the loving and diverse jackboot of the Left on its throat for a long time.
But as anyone who is even vaguely familiar with the rise of talk radio can tell you, that only meant the Right had to create their own niche in the market. So, they did. Whether it was Rush Limbaugh, Fox News, or Truth Social, the Right found a way to take the good parts of what the Left shit on, clean them off, and make them work.
Unfortunately for the Left, they’re not so successful in reversing the political polarity and being successful. And this whole “Bro Whisperer” thing is bound to tank more than Michael Dukakis in a tank.
First off, the concept is utterly demeaning to anyone with an IQ above Kate Moss’s waist size. Which is why the Left thinks it’s a great idea, by the way. As much as the Left loves to push back against negative gender stereotypes when it comes to women (and, more recently, men who claim to be women but have a five o’clock shadow that would make Bigfoot look like Dr. Evil), they’re resorting to the characterization of potential young male voters as early 90s-era frat boys. Instead of doing some introspection and working on an actual message, turn them all into “bros.”
Fucking brilliant.
Of course, this runs counter to the way the Left has seen men in recent decades. Potential rapists, gun nuts, control freaks, hyper-macho gym bros, colonists, misogynists, homophobes, intellectually and emotionally stunted, and the hits keep coming. And those are the names they use if they like you!
Seriously, though, the Left has been pounding the drums that men suck for a while now. Even now, the big brains on the Left blame men for Queen Kamala the Appointed’s election loss, but this time it’s men of all colors, not just whites, who get the blame. Apparently, men are afraid of strong women leaders, but the Left hasn’t presented any to us aside from Tulsi Gabbard. Most of the time, the Left’s idea of a strong woman is weaker than the drinks at a fourth-rate strip club.
Not that I know anything about that, mind you…
Let me help you Leftists with an important concept that will come in handy sooner or later: not everything you think can be boiled down to sexism is actually sexism. Unless you’re taking the same drugs Joy Reid is, Harris ran a horrible campaign and wasted a shit-ton of money in the process. She didn’t really make much of an appeal to men, instead focusing on abortion (which Leftists keep telling us “no vagina, no say” so men would be further excluded from the conversation). And aside from doing a horrible fucking job on tasks President Brick Tamland gave her, she could list the number of successes she’s had on the one hand of the world’s unluckiest woodworker. It’s the lack of outreach on her campaign’s part that cost her the male vote.
Say what you will about Trump, he at least appealed to potential voters from all walks of life. That’s what drew in voters and political and social figures like the aforementioned Rogan and Musk. He didn’t talk down to them. He didn’t throw them out of the movement if they dared to consider the Right might not be the second coming of Hitler. Now that Queen Kamala the Appointed got stomped like a vat of grapes in an “I Love Lucy” episode, some on the Left are now willing to listen.
Hence, the “Bro Whisperer” bullshit.
But remember what I said earlier about the Left not exactly being successful in adopting ideas of the Right? Yeah, this is another one of them. On the bright side, though, it gives us an opportunity to remember the good old days of Air America. Yeah, that was an enjoyable three days (fewer if you take out all the commercials).
Now, typically I try to avoid making superficial comments about a Leftist’s looks or personality. Unfortunately, I’m going to have to break that rule this time because the “Bro Whisper” is the least Bro-ish Bro to ever Bro a Bro, Bro. But the Left are looking to him to help bridge the gap between themselves and the segment of the population they’ve shit on for decades. All I gotta say is good luck, kid. Maybe you’ll be Bro Rogan, but I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you won’t.
This on-again-off-again political romance with male voters shows the duplicity of the Left’s approach, as well as the cynicism behind it. The thing to remember is the Left thinks we’re dumber than a bag of hammers unless we say, think, and do exactly what they do. They see us as goldfish with a blackout drinking problem: short of memory and not terribly clear on the details. Anyone who backs the “Bro Whisperer” concept is perpetuating that idea. They think going from blaming male voters for not giving us Queen Kamala the Appointed to asking for their votes (and money, of course) is no big deal because we won’t remember how they called us fascists.
Even though it was literally a week or two before Election Day. I’m sure Queen Kamala’s positions have changed since then and she wants to make up for slamming men more than Nancy Pelosi slams shots at an open bar. She’s matured in that nearly 2 month period.
And if you believe that, I have some swamp land in the Sahara Desert I’d love to sell ya.
The best part of the “Bro Whisperer” (at least to me) is how confident the Left is it’s going to work. The Left has a serious ego problem (but that’s a blog post for another day) and it’s their sheer arrogance in their shitty ideas that will make the inevitable flop all the more enjoyable. In today’s political environment, the Left is Wile E. Coyote and we’re Acme.
I’m sure the “Bro Whisperer” is going to give it the old community college/votech try and the Left will marvel at the tens and tens of listeners he’s going to get, but it’s too late for the Left to mend fences. You’re going to have to be real going forward to regain the male vote.
On the bright side, you still have the men pretending to be women vote on lockdown!
Noses Up, Thumbs Down
As a recovering Leftist, I could go on for days about everything I see wrong with the current Left, mainly because they tend to be the same problems I saw when I was among their ranks. They’re not even original enough to recycle their problems!
The one common aspect that flows through all of these issues is arrogance. Regardless of the circumstances, Leftists always think they’re the smartest people in the room and aren’t afraid to let you know it. And they’re obviously better than you because they’re Leftists.
If that logic were any more circular it would give me motion sickness.
And that’s on top of the nausea I get when listening to Leftists expound upon their brilliance with takes worse than letting Lindsey Lohan be your AA sponsor. Just look back at any of the Leftists livestreaming the 2024 election. Down to the one, they all had the same take: Queen Kamala the Appointed was not only going to win, but ran a flawless campaign. Only the worst possible people could possibly vote for Donald Trump!
Yeah, about that.
Not only did Leftists double down on the “everyone else is stupid” rhetoric (which always brings people to the polls…to vote against them), but they also did what they did with climate change “research”: start with the answer and work backwards, ignoring anything that contradicts the desired results. In doing so, the Left has become the personification of the Principal Skinner “No, it’s the children who are wrong” meme.
To this day (see local listings for Leftist insanity in your area) the Left will do anything they can to avoid the one thing they need to do to move forward: admit they were wrong. And to their credit, some Leftists are starting to do just that, whether it be out of a crisis of conscience or a crisis of potential irrelevancy. Most of them, however, are confident it’s everyone else who is to blame for their own fuck-ups.
That’s the thing about egotists. They can never fail; they can only be failed. When they make a mistake, it’s always someone else’s or something else’s fault. And guess who is using this very tactic to explain away the 2024 election debacle and prepare for the 2028 election debacle?
You got it. The same people who gave us Queen Kamala the Appointed.
And it’s not just in politics where the Left claim to be smarter than everyone else. The Leftist smug reaches in to academia, especially science. Climate change predictions that never come true, COVID-19 guidelines based on utter bullshit, people who make Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson the de facto experts on all things science (even when the science is not in their respective backgrounds), the adoption of 72 genders (Spoiler Alert: still just 2), the acceptance that trans women are no different than biological women, and many more anti-science takes from the self-professed “Party of Science.” And if you dare speak out and present data that proves them wrong, you’re a heretic and must be dismissed, censored, maligned, called a conspiracy nut, and so on.
And if these Leftist science fans are proven wrong, that information gets memory-holed faster than Eric Roberts accepts a role. An example of this is evolution. Growing up, all the Leftists (myself included) said man evolved from apes. It was repeated so much that it became the common truth, in spite of the fact there wasn’t much science to back it up. Years later, I was in an AOL chat room (ah, those were the days) and mentioned this. A Leftist then told me no scientist actually believed that and that I was making it up. No matter what sources I used or firsthand direct experience I had to the contrary, it was never enough to satisfy the Leftist. Their orthodoxy had changed, or should I say…evolved.
I’ll see myself out.
But before I go, there is one more thing I have to point out. A lot of the Leftist bravado comes with little-to-no justification. They think they’re smart because they all believe the same things, but if what they believe is utterly stupid, it’s not a sign of brilliance. When you press them on any significant issue, most of the time they wind up looking like an idiot. Or worse yet, Cenk Uygur.
And yet they think this attitude is a real winner. Keep thinking that, kids. Just try to act surprised when this shit blows up in your face. Again.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
As the Left continues to have a shit-fit over losing to Donald Trump for a second time, they’re coming up with familiar complaints about the incoming Administration. One of the most popular (at least from what I’ve seen on social media) is all about billionaires. The Left will have us believe the incoming Trump Administration will be comprised of billionaires, all of whom are hell-bent on fucking over the working class just to make a little more money.
Why, it’s almost as if the Left knows how Congresscritters make their fortunes!
Anyway, the Left’s hatred of billionaires isn’t anything new, but it’s worth mocking them in this week’s Lexicon!
billionaires
What the Left thinks it means – greedy people who only want more money and power at the expense of the rest of the population
What it really means – people who have a shit-ton of money
There are 801 billionaires in America, according to people who track this sort of thing (i.e. people who make me look like Charlie Sheen on a coke bender). Out of 337 million Americans as of this writing, you’re more likely to get hit by lightning than to run into a billionaire. However, you are still less likely to find a Leftist who understands basic economics.
And, oddly enough, it’s out of both of these that the Left’s hatred of billionaires stems: a lack of exposure, and a lack of knowledge. I’ve spoken before of the Left’s economic delusions operating out of a zero-sum game mindset, so I won’t go into it too deeply here. I’m boring enough as it is. However, I can take a nugget out of the Left’s turd of an economic approach and apply it here.
Put simply, the Left feels anyone who makes a lot of money does it through underhanded and cruel means. Their idea of a billionaire is right out of a political cartoon: fat men smoking cigars and looking down at the working man making an honest living.
So, basically, Michael Moore.
And it’s with this stereotypical mindset that the Left uses a lack of connection with the billionaires to forge their hatred. After all, it’s a lot easier to stoke fear and hatred of others when you can completely remove any vestige of humanity from them. Take the recent shooting of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson, for example. Seeing Leftists from the Socialist Socialite to Chief Running Mouth to Taylor “The 80 Year Old Virgin” Lorenz play the “murder is bad, buuuuuuttt…” card to justify their desire to see a wealthy man pay for the crime of…well, being rich, of course, showcases how easily the Left can turn an actual human being into an it, devoid of a soul, agency, or any redeeming qualities whatsoever.
There’s a lot I could say about the shooting, but that’s a blog post for another time.
In the meantime, it’s interesting how the Left hates billionaires…considering how many of them swing to the Left. As it turns out, more than a few backed Queen Kamala the Soon To Be Unemployed, including your fiend and mine, Uncle George Soros. And don’t forget media darling Taylor Swift, whose wealth is derived from writing music about being shit at relationships. Without her help, Queen Kamala would have lost by even more!
Wait! It’s almost as if the Left’s hatred of billionaires might just be…politically motivated! I know! I was just as shocked as you are when I realized it.
See, if you’re a billionaire like Tom Steyer (net work $2 billion), you’re exempt from being a bad person because you believe the right things. If you’re a billionaire like Elon Musk (net worth $374.9 billion), you’re evil because you don’t believe the right things. But here’s the thing: they’re both fucking billionaires! Just because you share ideological points with them doesn’t change the zeroes in their bank accounts.
But it might just increase the number of zeros who will cover for you if you support the “right” ideas.
The thing that gets me about the Left’s hatred of billionaires that don’t agree with them, or wealthy people in general, is how it’s based on an arbitrary and, thus, stupid thing. Who the fuck cares if someone has more money than you do? Live your life and don’t give one-one-trillionth of a shit about what someone else makes. The only exception I have to this rule is if that person directly causes you physical, emotional, or financial harm in the pursuit of that money.
Let me repeat that for the Leftists: if that person directly causes you physical, emotional, or financial harm. No six degrees of Kevin Bacon, no “such-and-such is literal violence,” no hurt fee-fees. Di-fucking-rect. And given the fact you’re more likely to win a billion in the lottery than you are to meet a billionaire, you have zero grounds to blame them for anything. If your life is shit, it’s not because a billionaire is fucking with you. The sooner you get that, the sooner you’ll be happier.
But the Left can’t be happy. Trust me, I used to be one. One of the key aspects of being a Leftist is always being pissed off at something. And, at least for the next few microseconds or four years (whichever pisses Leftists off more), it’s going to be billionaires. And no matter what, it will never stop being hypocritical.
And funny as fuck.
An Open Letter to the Left
Hey, kids. It’s your internet buddy, Thomas. Listen, we need to talk about what just happened a couple of weeks ago. You know when your side lost to Donald Trump, again?
Now, this isn’t going to be one of those pieces where I mock your misfortune. There’s plenty of time to do that, and trust me I will. Instead, this piece has more of a serious tone, but will occasionally move into humorous terrain because I’m a firm believer politics is too serious a topic not to make fun of it.
So, with that being said, let me start with a question: what in the red, white, and blue fuck is wrong with you? Seriously, I’ve seen Chicago Bears fans this year take losses better than you have.
But that’s not the issue I have with you right now. I expect you to be sore losers because you’re sore winners. Where I’m coming from is what you refuse to learn from this ass-whupping and how it’s going to fuck you sideways in future elections unless you figure this shit out.
Let’s start with the Democatic scapegoat…I mean candidate, Kamala Harris. She had three and a half years to show she could fill in for Joe Biden and she failed. Now, you could (and definitely have) tried to chalk this up to racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia, agoraphobia (probably), and a metric shit-ton of other buzzwords, but there is a simpler reason.
She positively sucked as a candidate.
A lot of that falls at her feet. She didn’t have a clear, consistent message that resonated with anyone with higher than a third grade education for starters. I mean, “joy” as one of the many campaign trial (and mostly error) balloons? That’s about as fucking stupid as a candidate whose entire campaign could be boiled down to “hope” and “change.” But, I’m sure no one would ever be dumb enough to run such a candidate…okay, never mind.
The point is nothing she did seemed to be relatable because it truly felt she was only reciting squawking points without even a micron of sincerity. Except when it came to calling Donald Trump and his followers fascists because that always works, right?
Ooooooh. That didn’t work this time, did it? See, what works for your party faithful may not work for anyone else. And it leads to another aspect of her failed campaign: nobody who worked on it knows a fucking thing about what the electorate wants or needs. When Ms. Harris wasn’t dodging live interviews with people who might ask her a question more difficult than “What color is the red fire truck?” she was talking down to us, as were her surrogates and media types (who were pretty much one in the same). And last time I checked, joy didn’t pay the fucking bills.
And given how much she spent on celebrities, I really don’t think I’d trust her to run a tab at an all-you-can-drink water bar, let alone propose new spending to drive up the national debt even higher. I mean, she raised over a billion dollars and still came up a couple mil in the hole? But I’m sure it was money well wasted.
And while we’re here, whose idea was it to drag out celebrities who don’t have to take out a second mortgage to get a dozen eggs to tell us all how Kamala Harris is going to make our lives better? If you find out, make sure he or she is never allowed to do anything more complicated than getting coffee for the campaign staff, and even then double check to make sure the orders didn’t get fucked up. A pretty tall order, if not a grande or vente.
Meanwhile back at the clusterfuck that is the Left, there is a point you need to seriously consider, but you probably won’t because it would lead to enlightenment and self-reflection, that being you made the Trump victory possible. Who hid Joe Biden’s cognitive decline and gaslighted anyone who pointed out he wasn’t playing well with reality? That was you. Who decided to push away a Kennedy from the party? You again! Who tried to push Biden out of the race well after he had secured the nomination? Also you. Who decided to make one of the least popular Vice Presidents in modern history into the Second Coming of Barack Obama? Still you.
See a pattern forming here, kids?
And that’s only on your side of the aisle. You also made Donald Trump into a sympathetic figure. Convicted of 34 felonies, survivor of at least 2 known assassination attempts, the target of Leftists within the halls of power at the local, state, and federal levels, the center of a number of prove lies, and being accused of being weird, fascist, and the end of democracy as we know it. This should have been a slam dunk for Harris, but you assholes snatched defeat from the jaws of victory, and removed the lack of a popular vote victory that you saddled him with in 2016.
If your goal was to make Michael Dukakis in a tank look like George W. Bush on an aircraft carrier, mission accomplished. If your goal was to make Kamala Harris a viable Presidential candidate, boy did you fuck that up!
While you’re busy coming up with excuses to remove your fingerprints off Trump 47, there should be a moment of self-reflection when you realize no amount of Lady MacBeth-esque scrubbing will get your grubby fingerprints off the Election 2024 clusterfuck.
But when you’re ready to make progress instead of making stupid blue wristbands so you can recognize each other as you cosplay as The Handmaid’s Tale, it’s time you face some really hard truths.
1. Pissing off potential voters isn’t ever a winning strategy.
2. Acting like you’re smarter than you actually are will only make you look like assholes.
3. You are way too intellectually and ideologically insulated to know what your policies are doing to people outside of your circles.
4. You have no real bench for the 2028 Presidential election because you’re too focused on identity politics.
5. With the LGBTQIALEUCOMEONYOUCANNOTADDMOREFUCKINGLETTERSANDSYMBOLSTOTHISMOMENT+ community, you are trying to appeal to a fraction of a fraction of the population, which guarantees you will continue to be trounced in the polls.
But if recent polling is accurate, you idiots want Kamala Harris to run again in 2028.
You know, maybe getting pimp-slapped by the Right repeatedly is the best possible outcome for you. Maybe then you’ll figure this shit out and stop pissing off people you need to vote for you.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
With the reelection of Donald Trump, Leftists took the realization Queen Kamala the Appointed wasn’t going to be President as well as you’d expect: by being bat-shit insane. I mean, even worse than they normally are, which is saying a lot from an ideological group that thinks trans women can get pregnant.
Well, some of those trans men may have to pick up the slack, thanks to a movement Leftists women adopted in the wake of Trump’s victory. It’s called the 4B movement, and it’s…well, we’ll get into that after the break.
4B movement
What the Left thinks it means – women protesting the patriarchy by cutting off any relationship or sexual ties with men
What it really means – Leftist women co-opting a movement because Orange Man Bad
The origins of 4B has its roots in a South Korean feminist movement in the mid-to-late-2010s. The tenets of 4B are as follows:
no sex with men
no giving birth
no dating men
no marriage with men
In other words, my dating history prior to meeting my wife.
The driving force behind 4B is a desire to reject the “normal” family dynamic and the male-dominated culture that perpetuates it. Given the culture in South Korea and the challenges women face as a result of it, there is a legitimate need for such a movement, even if I may not align with them politically. I firmly believe there are things women can do as well as a man, if not better, and that women should be given the chance to succeed or fail on their merits.
So, naturally, Leftist women in America have to go and fuck it up.
Before they could get warmed up for their epic meltdowns, Leftist women were looking into 4B thanks to social media. Yes, the same outlets where people do stupid dances or post images of food are responsible for this movement coming to our shores. To which I say fuck you very much.
Or not.
And the thought behind this is just as shallow as the “influencers” on the aforementioned social media sites. Because Donald Trump appointed Supreme Court Justices who…horror of horrors…told the country abortion was a state issue, the misogyny of men not wanting to vote for Queen Kamala the Appointed because she ran a campaign so bad it made Walter Mondale circa 1984 look like Ronald Reagan circa 1984, and Orange Man Bad, of course, Leftist women are going to…adopt conservative values.
Holy self-own, Batman!
But it gets even better when you consider the Left’s fascination with abortion. Not only was it one of Queen Kamala the Appointed’s campaign cornerstones, but it’s a wedge issue that has worked time and time again in getting votes from a wide swath of the female population. Didn’t work this time, but that’s a blog post for another day.
Anyway, imagine the impact of Leftist women not having sex. Aside from making Tinder a lot easier for horny men to find a hook-up, it has the potential to reduce the number of abortions done. And what was one of the reason Leftist women want to adopt 4B?
Abortion rights.
Looks like Planned Parenthood is going to need even more federal funds to keep the doors open. Good luck with that with the incoming Administration and Congress, ladies.
To make matters worse (and by worse I mean a lot funnier), Leftist women are doing everything they can to repel men. Many are shaving their heads, getting tattoos or blue bracelets to show they voted for Queen Kamala the Appointed (and, thus, “safe”), or even suggesting men should be poisoned. Because that’s completely rational and totally not ultra-turbo-psycho-bitch behavior.
There are a lot of jokes I could make about Leftist women taking this tack, like how a significant chunk of the women backing 4B in America won’t have to worry about ever needing to get an abortion because they are less likely to have sex than an Amish eunuch, but that’s not what I do. That kind of superficiality only matches the superficiality of the women deciding to adopt 4B and, to be frank (or if you prefer, Steve), they really don’t deserve it.
Now, pointing and laughing, on the other hand…
Seriously, kids, it’s hard for me to take the Americanized version of 4B seriously because it makes no sense on any level and it reduces women to their lady parts…which is what a lot of immature men already do. Leftists believe women’s vaginas create a sisterhood that requires all women to think, speak, and most importantly vote a certain way. Otherwise you’re betraying your gender.
Unless, of course, there are women to the right of Gloria Steinem. Then, fuck those women!
But there is no such sisterhood, and there never has been. Men don’t think, act, and vote a certain way because we all have dicks. We do that because we’re men. We are pretty simple creatures when you get right down to it. It’s hard-wired into our DNA from Ug on down.
Women, by contrast, are much more complex, and I for one am glad for that. The females of the species are more in tune with their emotions (which explains a lot about the Leftist women signing on for 4 years of 4B when you think about it) because it’s hard-wired into their DNA. A woman is a marvel of creation, able to be a fierce lover and a fierce fighter depending on the situation, being the one responsible for carrying life within her body, and having the intelligence to guide her male counterpart towards a better way.
But Leftist women believe in the Sisterhood of the Traveling Vajayjay.
Call me crazy (and I’m sure you will if you haven’t already), but that comes off as incredibly condescending and, dare I say it (Spoiler Alert: I do dare), rather misogynistic. By viewing everything through the pussy prism, Leftists strip away everything that makes women special and turns them into objects without agency. As bad as you Leftists think Donald Trump is, you aren’t much better.
It will be interesting to see how long Leftist women will keep up with the tenets of 4B. It might last as long as a TikTok dance fad or go on and on like “The View.” In either case, I think I can speak for a good chunk of the American male population with this simple sentence.
Your terms are acceptable.