Category: Economics

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

There’s a little word starting with the letter D that has Leftists up in arms more than usual. No, it’s not “domestic terrorism” or “DeSantis” or even “D-Student President.” The word is “default” and Leftists are sounding the alarm that unless those evil mean ole Republicans approve a bunch of spending (which is totally related to running the country and isn’t related to a bunch of partisan bullshit designed to help Leftists buy… I mean earn votes). And those evil mean dagnasty Republicans want to…horror of horrors…spend less! Those monsters!

While talks between President Puddin’ Head Joe and House Speaker Kevin “Not Charlie” McCarthy have broken down more often than the car I bought from a sleazy used car salesman (i.e. a used car salesman), it seems more and more people on the Left are afraid we aren’t going to pay our bills and Grandma Gertrude will lose her Social Security, Medicare, and all means to survive. It’s going to be worse than January 6th!

Yeah, not so much. Let’s dive in

default

What the Left thinks it means – what will happen right now unless House Republicans agree to keeping proposed expenditures at higher rates

What it really means – a condition that hasn’t happened yet, but will become a reality in the near future

First off, a bit of insider baseball. Congressional budgeting isn’t the same thing as personal budgeting because the government can always print more money. If you or I did that, we’d be thrown in jail.

Come to think of it, that would be an ideal solution to the problems I have with Congress…

Anyway, because of this federal ability to print money, you’re more likely to find a happy Bud Light drinker than the government is to default on our debts. There are risks tied to this, namely the US Dollar becoming more worthless than Kanye West’s 2024 Presidential campaign coffers, but our elected officials aren’t stupid enough to let that happen, right?

Considering there is a sitting Representative who expressed fear that Guam would capsize if there were too many people, I’m not betting the farm on that.

But what I am betting the farm on is a lot of histrionics from people who don’t know the first thing about how economics works, even those who boast of having economics degrees but couldn’t make change.

Or toast, for that matter.

At the heart of this current kurfluffle is the Left’s insistence we raise the debt ceiling to ensure expenditures get paid. Put another way, Leftists are “just trying to pay America’s bills.”

One tiny problem (well, more than one, but we’ll get into that a bit later). The spending being done now is for the next fiscal year, which doesn’t start until…October 1, 2023. The shit we’re dealing with now is from the fiscal year that began October 1, 2022, when Democrats controlled the House and, thus, controlled spending.

Waitaminute…wouldn’t that give Leftists a vested interest in raising the debt ceiling (which is like getting a credit line increase on the federal Visa card)? Why…yes, yes it would!

It also gives them a manmade…womanmade…wymynmade…transmade…whatever made line 0f attack against House Republicans. After all, they’re standing in the way of paying America’s bills, right?

Not so much. The House passed a debt bill waaaaaaaay back on April 26th, a bill that Senate Majority Leader Chuck “Not Amy” Schumer called “dead on arrival” and President Puddin’ Head Joe said he would veto the House bill if it passed the Senate. Compare this to his comments from a few weeks ago (and a few days after he made the veto comment) trying to spin the situation to his advantage.

Hmmm…kinda makes you wonder who’s really forcing the default issue, doesn’t it?

But it’s not like the Left doesn’t have solutions. Members of the Congressional Progressive Caucus sent Puddin’ Head Joe a letter suggesting he invoke the 14th Amendment as a means to resolve the debt ceiling issue and avoid default. Although this may seem like a stretch that would make Reed Richards look like a block of stone, Section 4 gives at least somewhat of a framework.

The validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law, including debts incurred for payment of pensions and bounties for services in suppressing insurrection or rebellion, shall not be questioned. But neither the United States nor any state shall assume or pay any debt or obligation incurred in aid of insurrection or rebellion against the United States, or any claim for the loss or emancipation of any slave; but all such debts, obligations and claims shall be held illegal and void.

Now, I didn’t say the Left had good solutions.

The Left’s argument relies on the “validity of the public debt…shall not be questioned” part. Thanks to our good friends at Merrium Webster, we have two definitions of “validity” that maybe kinda sorta works.

the quality or state of being valid: such as

a: the state of being acceptable according to the law

b: the quality of being well-grounded, sound, or correct

Now, I’m giving the Left more credit than usual for deep thinking, but just because they put a little more thought into it than how they want their steaks cooked doesn’t mean they’re on the right track. Even with the most liberal (see what I did there) interpretation of the definitions, you’re still left with the “so what” question. How does this apply to the debt ceiling?

According to Al Jazeera (because I love to be an equal opportunity mocker of bad ideas), invoking the 14th would eliminate the debt limit and allow the nation’s bills to be paid. Now, this may solve the short term issues, but astute readers and students of history know how this is likely to end.

Spoiler Alert for you Leftists out there: it doesn’t end well for anyone, especially you.

Even though the Left is almost completely wrong here, they have inadvertently stumbled into a real issue: we aren’t taking federal spending seriously. I would say the government spends money like drunken sailors, but that would be insulting inebriated members of the Navy and I won’t stand for that. I don’t have any reason to believe we’d ever go into default, but only because of the power the federal government has to create money out of thin air. And we’re not talking about bills that have anything backing it, mind you. Right now the only thing backing the US Dollar is…our word.

Any Native American readers want to chime in on how much the government’s word is worth?

More to the point, our government’s spending makes the possibility of an actual default more and more likely unless we get a handle on it. As anyone who has had to take our a second mortgage to buy eggs this week can attest, inflation is a real issue affecting us all on some level. The more money we print, the less value it has. Before you know it, we’re post-WWI Germany without the pointy helmets.

And the thing is we keep running into this game of economic chicken every fucking year. The party in power of Congress and the party out of power always jockey for position in the weeks and months before the government can’t pay its bills and chaos ensues (according to the Left). Then, we might have to…shut down the government until a deal can be reached! Then, people might realized just how big, cumbersome, and mostly useless government actually is, and that’s going to hurt Leftists!

Wait. I’m not sure there’s a downside here. Oh, wait, I see one: this brinkmanship is tired, as well as tiring. But we will keep seeing it as long as both major parties prefer it to fiscal responsibility. Democrats and Republicans don’t want to think about what happens when the interest payment on the national debt exceeds our ability to pay since they’re too busy trying to figure out how to blame it on each other.

I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating (for no other reason than to pad out this piece a bit more). America has a spending problem. We are a shopaholic with the world’s most elite credit card, and we keep upping the credit limit because our elected officials are more than willing to sign off on it. And as long as the dipshits in Washington DC fail to grasp even basic accounting practices (i.e. being too far in the red is a bad thing), we’re going to keep playing chicken with the can being kicked down the road so a new group of dipshits can play.

Well, there’s a line from the movie “War Games” that applies here: “The only winning move is not to play.” Granted, we’re not dealing with Global Thermonuclear War or even chess, but we are hurtling towards a different point of no return, one where default is all but guaranteed. Cutting proposed spending while still increasing spending doesn’t help. Our national debt is in the trillions of dollars, and nobody on either side really wants to do the one thing that will help.

STOP FUCKING SPENDING!

While Republicans don’t seem to have any answers, at least they’re not really dumb ideas, which is what the Left has to offer right now. So, expect more chicken in DC and less in your refrigerator.

Speaking of which, could you help me out? I need to buy some chicken and I’m short by, oh, a few thousand dollars. Thanks in advance!








Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

Granted, I’m a week late on this, but under the circumstances (namely me deciding to write about something else), I hope you’ll forgive me. And if not, well…I’ll pout.

Anyway, California is usually at the forefront of a lot of things, namely really bad ideas. Recently, San Francisco proposed a lump sum payment of $5 million to eligible blacks for reparations, among other proposals. Additionally, the state’s Reparation Task Force submitted a report to the California Legislature that Governor Gavin Newsom is expected to implement if the legislature doesn’t act.

As a result, I am stating for the record I now self-identify as a black resident of San Francisco. Please respect my privacy during my transition.

Seriously, reparations is a controversial subject to say the least, which means it’s perfect for your favorite blogger who writes a weekly series by this specific title to cover. Take that, “Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week” written by Jerry Funklemeyer!

reparations

What the Left thinks it means – monetary compensation given to blacks due to America’s slave history

What it really means – another way for white Leftists to blow through more of our money so they can feel good about themselves

The Civil War/War Between the States/War of Northern Aggression/The War the Movie “Glory” Was Based On was one of the most difficult and bloody times of our nation’s relatively young history. From 1861 to 1865, this country was more fractured than Jackie Chan’s body after doing his own stunts. But once the Union prevailed, the question was what to do next. Back then, they didn’t have Leftists to provide their sage advice about misogyny and trans rights in the former Confederacy, so it came down to a meeting between William T. Sherman and black ministers to create an attempt at reparations: 40 acres. (Mule, sold separately.)

And that attempt got scuttled by President Andrew Johnson, leaving the matter unresolved until recently.

There have been calls for reparations in recent history, but the idea really took off in 2020 thanks to the Democratic Primaries where there were…four black candidates out of 27. Five if you count Elizabeth Warren. And of those black candidates, none got the nomination, and only one (Kamala Harris) got to the White House as Puddin’ Head Joe’s Vice-President. Not too shabby for someone who I almost tied in the Iowa Caucuses and I didn’t even run.

Out of that and the shootings of blacks that occurred in 2019-2020, the idea of reparations gained new steam, which prompted California to create the aforementioned Reparations Task Force.

So, now that we’re back in the present, let’s start shitting on the reparations idea, shall we?

As a concept, reparations aren’t that hard to understand. We wronged an entire race of people by enslaving them and treating them worse than Ike treated Tina, so we want to try to balance the scales somehow. Admirable goal, but the logistical equivalent of an M.C. Escher drawing.

The biggest hurdle to the idea of reparations is the fact none of the people who are demanding it today were ever slaves. And it’s not like we can fire up the TARDIS, go back to 1865, drop off $5 million, and tell the slaves to invest heavily in Apple in 100+ years. Although time can be a big ball of wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff, it’s still bound by fixed events that can be tracked. And with the passage of time comes the birth of generation after generation that are removed from slavery altogether, save by bloodline.

But does bloodline alone create a solid enough link to award $5 million? That creates another speed bump to payday: what about those who either didn’t own slaves or fought for the Union in the Civil War? If bloodline is enough to give away money, it should also be good enough to exempt people from being forced to contribute to this monetary transfer. I have two relatives who fought for the Union (who, by the way, fought at least in part to end slavery). Yet, I get the feeling I would be expected to open my wallet and give generously to the Give Non-Slaves $5 Million Because Fuck You That’s Why Foundation.

And don’t get me started on their telethons!

Then, there’s the question of mixed-race children. Back in the day, white slaveowners knocked boots with slaves, which resulted in the genes of both races coming together to form a new life. Would the families of such a sexual union have to pay up or receive reparations? Or maybe they would just get $2.5 million? Or would the white half have to pay the black half $5 million?

Regardless, the fact we can even ask some of these questions without the pro-reparations side coming up with answers is not a good sign. But wait, there’s more!

Dropping $5 million into anyone’s lap is going to be significant, and it opens up any number of opportunities. And if it’s bundled in hundred dollar bills, it’s going to make the males in the audience sing tenor for a few years. For most people, though, it’s life-changing money, but only if it’s used intelligently. This is where human nature comes into play. If we get any amount of money from $2 on a scratch-off ticket to millions of dollars, our first instinct is to spend it. If this sum comes with few strings attached, though, we can get pretty reckless with it because in our minds it’s “free money.”

But just as any breadwinner today can tell you, money can run out fast if you’re not careful. Or if you vote for Puddin’ Head Joe, which is pretty much the same thing as not being careful.

When we don’t know or care how we get the money, we have less of an incentive to be smart with it. And, no, this isn’t a racial thing, but rather a human thing. Economists have studied this phenomenon for decades and it always ends the same way: the further we are away from earning money, the easier it gets to spend. Hence, the reason so many big lottery winners end up blowing their winnings and winding up right back where they started.

Guess what I think will happen to the reparations money if it gets approved.

And it’s not like there isn’t precedent with this. Remember Hurricane Katrina (which, oddly or appropriately enough, was the last time Kanye West was relevant)? Well, some inventive (and ultimately dishonest) people found a way to turn tragedy into a windfall to the tune of an estimated $2 billion. Between recipients of the aid spending the money on non-essential items, including vacations and porn, and others getting relief funds for people who didn’t exist, Katrina proved to be a disaster of a natural disaster response.

But the Katrina failure was more federal, right? Nothing like that could happen on the state level, right? Wellllll…not really. Our good friends on the Left Coast racked up an estimated $20 billion in fraud related to the pandemic. Leftists bad with money? Why that’s…pretty normal, really.

Now, why would I bring up Katrina and COVID in a discussion about reparations? To underscore a point that will taint the idea: governments, especially large ones, don’t keep good tabs on who is getting the money. It’s more of a rubber-stamp process. Granted, the reparations initiative in San Francisco comes with some conditions, but I’m not sure the state government that racked up ten times the Katrina fraud is capable of making sure the conditions are met.

But then again, it’s not meant to be effective or efficient except in one area: easing the guilt white Leftists feel over slavery. And they’re willing to spend as much of your money as possible to make sure they feel better no matter how long it takes! When you consider the amount of guilt a Leftist could prevent brownouts in California if it could be converted into electricity, let’s just say you might as well give the government access to your bank accounts. I mean, if China doesn’t already have it, thanks to TikTok.

It’s at this point I need to remind the white Leftists…none of you fuckknuckles were alive during slavery. You can feel bad about what happened generations ago, but to make it a central part of your life is a bit extreme and at this point silly. Kinda like the Young Turks, but less comedic. You cannot change the past, nor can you expect any amount of money to ever make it right because there will always be people willing to prey on your guilt to get more money out of you. As long as the greedy and dishonest among us see Leftist largess as free money, the spigot will never turn completely off and there will be fraud aplenty.

The thing is the Left has made it amazingly easy to game the system, thanks to the rhetoric they’ve already presented as true. And eagle-eyed readers already know how. Remember, the Left maintains how you self-identify is as real as how you are. Rachel Dolezal and Shawn King both identify as black in spite of being whiter than a medical isolation room run by Mormon IBM executives. Yet, they were/are considered to be authentic voices on the black experience in America.

Well, shit. If they can do it, so can I. And I can think of 5 million reasons to do it!

And California can’t say shit about it. Well, they can, but they’ll look like hypocritical assholes doing it. So, win-win!

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

To all of you from all of, well, me, I hope you have a Merry Christmas, Happy Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Kickin’ Kwanza, Fabulous Festivus, Cool Yule, a Spectacular Solstice, or for those who don’t celebrate anything this time of year, happy Sunday.

And for a number of people who just so happen not to be us, Congress gave them a very generous holiday bonus to the tune of, oh, $1.7 trillion. It was part of an omnibus spending bill whisking its way to President Joe Biden’s desk as of this writing, where there is no doubt he will sign it. Where the doubt lies is whether he’ll sign it in pen or purple crayon.

Another issue not in doubt is your favorite blogger is going to cover it this week. And I will, too!

omnibus spending bill

What the Left thinks it means – a necessary spending bill that helps America and Americans

What it really means – a bill so full of pork Jews and Muslims can’t partake of it for religious reasons

In my lifetime, Congress has always been the home of big spenders, as the National Debt Clock continues to show. More on that later, but I wanted to give you an idea of the numbers we’re dealing with here before giving more details. Plus, it will give you a chance to get a stiff drink or fifty to steel your nerves.

First, let’s dig into the details. Thanks to Senator Rand Paul and Congressman Chip Roy, we have an idea of just what Leftists were telling us were vital expenditures necessary to keep the government from shutting down. Here are a few examples.

– $4.5 billion in COVID Economic Injury Disaster Grants to people who weren’t eligible to get them in the first place

– $1.7 billion for upkeep of federal office buildings not currently in use

– $140 million in COVID funds used to build a spa

– $31.5 million in COVID funds to buy luxury cars

– $3 million on watching ‘roided-up hamsters fight

– $2.1 million to encourage Ethiopians to wear shoes

– $1.1 million to teach mice to binge drink (could have just sent them to college)

– $69 million in overpayments to government contractors for a terminated contract

– $77 million in mismanaged and untracked fuel purchases by the State Department

And so on and so on.

Granted, you could make an argument for some of the spending ($3 million to build a Gandhi museum, almost $500 million to redevelop our hard cider industry, $200,000 for radio spots telling drivers to stop at railroad crossings), but most of it is USDA Certified Lean Bullshit. Out of all the bad financial decisions that makes Arthur Andersen look like Warren Buffett, possibly the worst was almost $120,000 going towards…and I wish I was making this up…a grant to research whether Thanos could actually snap his fingers while wearing the Infinity Gauntlet.

The short answer? No. My answer? No, because Thanos is a fucking fictional character.

Where is that stiff drink?

Okay, I’m ready to continue.

Remember when Ukrainian President and Vogue photo subject Volodymyr Zelensky recently told Puddin’ Head Joe he would need more money? Well, surprise surprise surprise, the omnibus spending bill has nearly $45 billion in aid earmarked for Ukraine. And that’s on top of the $68 billion we’ve already given them in 2022. For the math challenged out there, that will be in the neighborhood of $113 billion.

Of course Leftists and some self-described “real conservatives” tell us this money is essential and if we don’t agree, we’re anti-Ukraine and, thus, anti-American. In fact, to them it’s a no-brainer. After all, if we fund the Ukrainians well enough, they’ll beat the Russians and hinder their ability to influence the world

No. That’s really what they believe.

And if it hadn’t been for 18 Senate Republicans voting with Senate Democrats and two Independents in favor of the omnibus bill, we might not be having this conversation. As of this writing, only one of these 14 asshats, Mitt Romney of Utah, has even attempted to explain his reasoning.

Put simply, the Senate Republican support was a no-brainer because no brains went into their votes.

Bartender, hit me!

Now, for the fun part. All of this spending is being done without being in a budget. Since 1996, the federal government has been spending money through Continuing Resolutions (basically, an IOU Congress writes to itself promising to spend more money without any rhyme or reason) or…drum roll please…omnibus spending bills. The reason is simple: no budget means no budget limits. I’ve seen inebriated sailors with more restraint than Congress.

Speaking of inebriation…bartender!

Let me lay my cards on the table here. I’m not a fan of omnibus spending bills, not just the ones Puddin’ Head Joe will sign. Congress has a spending problem, and omnibus spending bills are blank checks backed up with the promise of professional liars that they’ll pay it back with interest.

By the way, $475 billion of the omnibus bill is for interest on the national debt.

Yeah, we’re never going to see a balanced budget anytime soon, not when it’s so easy to pass spending bills that have no fiscal strings attached.

Even if you’re in favor of the bill, you’re going to have a hard time convincing me spending any money on Thanos research, luxury cars, or building a spa advances anything in the national interest. Personal interests, sure, but national? Give me a fucking break!

Speaking of which, I’d better take a break from drinking long enough to wrap this up.

The very fact supporters of the omnibus spending bill have to rely on faux patriotism, a backdrop of Ukraine fighting for freedom, and the idea the government has to stay open or things won’t get done should give us pause to drink…I mean think. As Americans struggle to make ends meet due to inflation being higher than Tommy Chong on Willie Nelson’s tour bus, our elected officials continue to make matters worse by making our money more worthless than an abstinence talk by Bill Clinton.

The sad thing is there’s nothing we can do about it. Aside from a wholesale house (and Senate) cleaning and starting over, we’re stuck paying for someone else getting a luxury car, thanks to Daddy Government. The sad truth is there are so many Democrats and Republicans, both elected and governed, who have no problem with the current state of affairs. After all, they’re not going to pay the tab; we are.

And with that, I bring this Lexicon entry to a close. Which is good timing because I’m about to passdkjladkahdfadjf;dajkl;

[Editor’s Note: We found Thomas slumped over his laptop after getting blackout drunk writing this piece. We cleaned up his entry and his computer as well as we could. We are giving him coffee intravenously in the hopes he’ll be awake in time for next week’s Lexicon.]



Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

By the time you read this, it will be close to or the end of October, which means two things. One, the Detroit Lions are mathematically eliminated from the post season, and two, it’s almost the end of Election Season. And of the two, the latter is clearly more painful.

It’s also the start of what the Left hopes to be a major turning point in what is looking to be a political assbeating of Biblical proportions. They’re hoping to energize women voters using one of the major wedge issues of my lifetime, abortion. After the US Supreme Court did the unthinkable and made abortion a state issue, Leftists created the term Roevember.

And, thus, the month of my birth gets ruined, but for a completely different reason.

Roevember

What the Left thinks it means – a rallying cry for women to vote out Republicans to protect their reproductive rights

What it really means – a neat catchphrase for an issue that isn’t that important right now

It’s conventional political wisdom that the party that controls the Presidency loses Congressional seats during the midterms, and you can count on the one hand of the world’s worst butcher the number of times it hasn’t happened in recent history. That means, if conventional wisdom holds true this year, Democrats stand to lose at least some of their elections. That gives them a vested interest in keeping their base energized. And what better way to do that than to hype up the potential of losing abortion rights unless Democrats get elected/reelected?

I mean, aside from coming up with an actual platform.

Under normal conditions, this tactic might work. After all, a Gallup poll from earlier this year shows a majority of American adults consider themselves to be pro choice, with 61% of women identifying as such. Granted, I’m not a doctor, so I might be assuming the respondents’ genders, but I’m going to go with it for the purposes of this sketch.

Unfortunately for Democrats, these midterms aren’t normal, and I’m not just talking about the freaks Democrats have running in certain races. (And I apologize to all the freaks out there for comparing them to Democrats.) When it comes to issues Americans think are important, abortion is waaaaaaaaaay down the list. Why it’s almost as if people are more concerned with the ec0nomy than killing babies! The absolute nerve!

This begs the question of why Leftists would continue to push abortion rights as an issue when the more pressing issue is the flaming dumpster fire that is our economy. I’m glad you asked! I have an idea about why that is. It may not be original, so if someone else thought of this first, I’m sure someone will let me know in the comments.

Politics today revolved heavily around what each side of the aisle considers to be what’s wrong with the world. When the economy is flush, the Right turn inward to find inspiration for what changes they want to make and then try to turn that inner vision into outer action. When the economy sucks more than a million Dysons at the center of a black hole, the Right’s introspection doesn’t extend outside of their homes very often, except to commiserate with others in the same boat.

The Left, on the other hand, don’t diversify their opinions on what’s wrong with the world. The issues they felt were super-ultra-important in 1992 aren’t too different than they are in 2022. Even the various “new” issues they’ve raised are offshoots of issues they’ve been railing on for decades, just with a new coat of paint. And no matter what, good economy or bad, these issues will always be at the core of the Left’s campaigns.

Which means they are woefully out of touch with the electorate this year.

One of the Left’s big assumptions is the 167.5 million women in the United States will be coming out to vote in Roevember. Although we don’t have any official numbers for the 2022 midterms (because they haven’t happened yet), it’s normal for voter turnout to be lower for midterm elections as opposed to Presidential elections. Let’s assume the numbers FairVote provides in the aforementioned link are accurate and voter turnout is 40%. That means only 67 million women will be voting, and of those 40.87 million of them consider themselves to be pro choice. Not an insignificant number, but a lot lower than the 167.5 million the Left predict will take part in Roevember. And that assumes all of those 40.87 million are a) eligible to vote, and b) inspired to vote for Democrats. A lot of assumptions being made on an issue only 4% of Americans surveyed think is important.

I promise the rest of this piece won’t be so numbers-heavy.

Although Leftists are great with catchy slogans, they’re piss-poor with timing. With the economy and inflation running rampant like Godzilla in a Japanese fishing village, they’ve chosen to make “let’s kill babies in the womb” their rallying cry. Then again, if my party was responsible for the Godzilla-esque trampling of the economy, I might want to try to divert attention to something else, too.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say most of the people reading this aren’t going to fall for the repackaging job the Left is doing with Roevember, but just know there are plenty outside of this group that will. If nothing else, just run down the numbers with them and let them know their passion for voting because of Roevember would be better suited for something far more productive.

Booing the Detroit Lions.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

We have a lot on our plates these days, what with inflation making prices higher than Snoop Dogg on any day that ends with, well, “day,” a potential world war starting due to the Russia-Ukraine war, OPEC+ nations signalling they would cut production which would drive up gas prices, and a lot of other matters. Good thing we have an Administration willing to tackle the tough issues, like…equity.

In fact, between Vice President Kamala Harris talking about equity in fighting climate change as part of the Inflation Reduction Act and Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen announcing the Biden economic plan focusing on racial equity, the concept has gotten some much-needed attention. Which means it will get some much-needed mockery this week.

equity

What the Left thinks it means – a way to level the playing field and address past injustices against affected people

What it really means – a shift away from equality and towards disparate treatment done in the name of equality

Although equality and equity are often used interchangeably (often by Leftists to try to hide their agenda), there is a vital difference we have to address. Equality requires a level playing field for all by definition. Nobody gets preferential treatment or special dispensation to ask for and receive anything extra. Everybody is square (and from what I understand from Huey Lewis and the News, it’s hip to be that).

Equity, on the other hand, doesn’t require all parties winding up equal. It allows there to be exceptions to the rule, so someone who may have been wronged previously can get a bit more to make up for it. In fact, there are three ways to achieve equity: elevate a party, lower a party, or a combination of the two. Of these, only one gives the recipient a chance to succeed on a larger scale, which naturally means Leftists hate it. Instead, they prefer to destroy rather that build, and I’m not talking about “The Big Dig” either!

The problem with is approach is weakening the strong doesn’t make the weak strong by extension. It just makes everyone weaker. At least, that is until Leftists try to rig things so those they perceive as weak (i.e. anyone who can be made to believe they’ve been oppressed) can become more powerful. But wouldn’t that make it so the formerly weak have to give up what the Left gave them to the formerly powerful? Well, the Left hasn’t figured that out yet and when you ask them about it, they give it some thought and realize it’s folly.

Nah, I’m just fucking with ya! They will just call you a bigot and go about their days without a sense of irony or an answer.

Regardless of the adjective Leftists use to clarify what kind of equity they want, understand it’s designed to deceive people into accepting outcomes that will ultimately screw them over. With racial equity, it’s playing to people’s guilt over previous racism they may or may not have been party to. With marriage equity, it’s playing to people’s guilt over past mistreatment of gays and lesbians. With economic equity, it’s trying to get people to feel guilty about other people being poor while they are comfortable.

Maybe it’s me, but I’m sensing a pattern here…

By making us feel guilty, Leftists psychologically manipulate us by preying on our desire to be liked. Of course, for cynical assholes like me, it’s a lot harder to do, but the point remains. Plus, we want the fastest resolutions we can get so we stop feeling guilty. What better way for Leftists to get what they want than to provide the current political/ideological version of indulgences to remove people’s “sins”? I mean, it worked for Oprah.

It wasn’t that long ago that Leftists clamored for equality, but that’s not good enough for them anymore. They need there to be some level of inequality (that they control, of course) so they can maintain the scam…I mean…wait, I do mean scam. Never mind.

The key to overcoming Leftist calls for equity is to continue to fight for equality, not of outcome, but of treatment. If we treat everyone with the same respect we would ask for ourselves, and if we support each other becoming the best we can be, it will go a long way towards removing the power the Left has when pushing for equity.

Well, either that, or not feeling guilty over shit we didn’t do or advocate. Remove the source of their power, and you negate their power. Simple as that.



Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week – Special Edition!

By the time you read this, we will be celebrating or will have just celebrated a pivotal holiday in America. It’s a day to remember the sacrifices of so many to make our country a better place. I’m speaking, of course, of the start of college football.

Oh, and there’s also Labor Day.

Labor Day was established to celebrate the contributions of working Americans, and as you might expect, Leftists are quick to champion those working Americans. Or do they?

working Americans

What the Left thinks it means – the backbone of this country, people who constantly get fucked over by the corrupt rich and corporations

What it really means – a wide swath of Americans who constantly get fucked over by the corrupt Left

If you listen to Leftists (and I wouldn’t recommend it unless you have a stiff drink or five), the only ones fighting for the working men and women are Leftists. They work so hard to get middle class tax cuts, only to be thwarted at every turn by those evil Republicans who are in the back pockets of the greedy rich. It’s all they can do for the people we rely on so much to make the country run as smoothly as possible.

Which is complete bullshit.

Oh, I know there are hard-working Americans out there because I am one. But the Left’s fawning over folks like us is phonier than a Karine Jean-Pierre excuse for why the country is on proverbial fire right now. Leftists have a healthy contempt for working folks, and no matter how many flannel shirts, blue jeans, and hard hats they wear, they can’t escape their attitudes or looking like a member of the Village People.

As frequent readers know or have figured out on their own, the Left hates anyone who isn’t them. Meaning, rich white Leftists. Everyone else is treated like pawns to be moved across the political chessboard as the elites see fit. Granted, the Right does this as well, but not to the extent and levels of deception the Left does. And when it comes to the game, the Left is Garry Kasparov.

The way Leftists deceive…I mean persuade people of their pro-worker stance is by playing into their emotions, namely greed and jealousy. After all, if working people are struggling, it has to be because someone is stealing from them and living the high life. It can’t possibly be any other reason!

Wellllll…except that it can, and a lot of times it’s because of what the Left proposes to “help” people. More on that later.

By playing into our natural negative emotions and setting up a nameless, faceless villain, the Left sets itself up to be our white knights. And although they profess to be fighting for all of us, they actually don’t. They like working folks who belong to labor unions and consistently vote for Leftists, even if it winds up shooting themselves in the foot with a Gatling gun.

Personally, I’ve seen this contempt for working Americans for a couple of decades, but it’s only recently that the contempt has been more overt, provided you know what to look for. And there is no better textbook on this than Thomas Frank’s What’s the Matter with Kansas? Fortunately, I read it so you don’t have to because, dammit, I care! (Actually, it was because I was curious to see what Frank had to say about conservatives in the Midwest, but I still care.)

I can summarize Frank’s entire book in one sentence: Conservatives have conned working people, and only Leftists can save them.

There. I saved you time, money, and emergency room visits for blunt head trauma from hitting your head against a wall repeatedly.

Frank’s attitude towards people living in the state he came from, merely for voting for Republicans, drips off each and every page. Although he does blame Democrats for sounding and acting fiscally conservative in order to win elections, he saves the bulk of his venom for conservatives who he felt corrupted politics in the state to work against the best interests of the voters.

The reason Frank’s screed…I mean book is a great example of the Left’s hatred of working Americans is because it exposes the rift between what the Left knows about working Americans and what working Americans actually are. What Frank attributes to conservatives convincing people to ignore their best interests is actually conservatives listening to working people and proposing ideas that they might actually like.

And judging from how well the Left has been dealing with the election of Donald Trump in 2016, they still haven’t figured it out. While the Trump Administration wasn’t exactly the best and brightest, they did get quite a few things right, including cutting taxes for working Americans. And contrary to what Leftists want us to believe, those tax cuts weren’t just for the wealthy. According to the IRS, middle class and working class people benefited the most from Trump’s tax cuts.

Then, Joe Biden rolled into town and undid all of that. Yay?

Of course, the Administration had answers for just about every concern we had about rising costs and how to address them. A lot of them involved, surprise surprise, initiatives the Biden Administration and Leftists want. Worried about rising gas prices? Get an electric car! And if you’re still concerned, just laugh! Having trouble paying for groceries? It’s Russia’s fault! Supply chain problems? Spend more on infrastructure! Unemployed? Support green energy!

I haven’t seen anyone this tone deaf since William Hung, and we’re being run by several of these assclowns. But, hey, no mean tweets, amirite?

Yet, for all of the answers the Left seem to have, few of them actually apply to working Americans. The only thing preventing Republicans from getting more working class voters is they’re incompetent when it comes to closing the sale. For all of his faults, Donald Trump at least made an attempt, which is more than a previous Republican Presidential candidate and rich guy, Mitt Romney, did in 2012. Guess what? It fucking worked!

Right now the door is wide open for Republicans and conservatives to make the sale they might be better for working Americans than the Left is. The Left is too busy focusing on social issues that turn off many Americans and finding new ways to fuck up the country to bother with Joe Sixpack’s problems. Trump gave the GOP a blueprint, much to the chagrin of people like Romney, whose version of a Republican President is as exciting as mayonnaise.

While Republicans try to figure out how to attract working Americans and Leftist try to find new ways to screw them, the working class are left with financial problems, rising costs, and more broken promises than a treaty with Native Americans in the 1800s. And the only way that changes is if working Americans are open to change their thinking. Many of them are locked into voting for Democrats because it’s what they and their families have always done. It’s like a rite of passage, only with more bureaucracy. As Donald Trump said in 2016 when asked why working people should vote for him, “What have you got to lose?”

Given how expensive things are now, we can’t do any worse.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

The big news this week involved President Joe Biden finally making good on a campaign promise to forgive at least some student loan debt. Many Leftists were overjoyed (mainly because I’m sure a number of them would be the beneficiaries of the President’s generosity), but there are more than a few people who are expressing concern about whether the student loan forgiveness initiative would be as effective and as expensive as promised.

Regardless of the boondoggle…I mean efforts to address student loan debt, there are a lot of questions to be asked. And I’m just the killjoy asshole to ask them.

student loan forgiveness

What the Left thinks it means – a compassionate move that will help college students and the economy at the same time

What it really means – the start of a lot of economic, Constitutional, and legal chaos with the stroke of a pen

On paper, student loan forgiveness sounds good. By forgiving up to $10,000 of loan debt, debtors and former debtors would have more money at their disposal, which could then be recirculated into the economy in all sorts of ways. And 10 grand will buy a lot of Starbucks and avocado toast!

Which some of these students complaining about the amount of loan debt they have to pay off are already buying in the first place, but we’re not supposed to know that…

Although the thought of more money going towards iPhones and gaming consoles is tantalizing to the capitalist in me, the long term implications are scarier than having Bill Clinton show up at your doorstep to pick up your daughter for a date. (Hey, at least it’s not Charlie Sheen!) And knowing how our friends on the Left aren’t known for planning any further out than the length of a TikTok video, you can bet few, if any, of the loudest proponents have given much thought to what I’m about to lay out for you.

Then again, it might be because I’m a weirdo. Either way, here goes!

– The Constitution may not grant the President the powers necessary to make this happen. President Biden’s actions came to pass because of an Executive Order, which is pretty much the President saying, “Do this because, fuck you, I’m the President.” Well, the Executive Order isn’t exactly a one-and-done situation because it can be challenged Constitutionally. And that brings us to Article I, Section 8 of the Constitution, which authorizes Congress “to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States…” Now, last time I checked, President Biden was no longer in Congress, even though he spent most of my life in it. That means unless Congress signs off on it, it ain’t happening for long before the Supreme Court gets involved. And with the current makeup of the High Court, you can bet Biden’s Executive Order will get smacked down harder than Mike Tyson beating up Richard Simmons.

– It has the potential to fuck up contract law. A loan is a contact between a lender and a borrower. With student loans, the lender is often the government. And, we all know how fiscally responsible it is, amirite? Anyway, forgiving even a portion of the debt affects the existing contract. Even though the government is one of the particulars of the loan in this case, it has the potential to set precedent once a court gets involved. Get the right judge in the right court to rule in a certain way and before you can say “habeas corpus” the government has the authority to alter any contract it wants, possibly even if it’s not a party to the original agreement. Welcome to Legal Chaos Land, population…well, us.

– The economic impact isn’t as cut and dried as we’ve been told. It seems intuitive that if you give people more money they will spend it. That’s been borne out with tax cuts and credit cards for decades, although the Left still isn’t convinced of the former. Now, add in a little thing called inflation, which all of us are enduring right now. If you have to take out a third mortgage to get groceries, no amount of money from the forgiving of existing student debt will help for very long.

– It doesn’t fix the underlying problems. There are a few reasons why student loan debt is so high. Part of it is the rising tuition costs. Since 1980, average tuition costs have risen by 1200%. And, no, that’s not a typo. And since tuitions have gotten higher than Willie Nelson on 4/20, the federal government has had to lend more money to students. And that includes interest with rates and conditions that make payday loan sharks look legit. Of course, once colleges and universities know the government will keep forking over the money, they will find reasons to keep raising tuition, and the cycle begins anew. And there is no incentive for either party to change that dynamic after some of the loans are forgiven. The college/university still gets its money, and the government gets to look like it cares about people. They don’t, of course…

– Once you get a bite of the apple, you’ll want more. By nature, humans tend to be greedy, self-serving, and always looking to push the limits to see what they can get away with. Right now, it’s only $10,000 that will get forgiven, but does it end there? Judging from recent government boondoggles…I mean programs like TARP and PPP, it’s likely there will be more demands for other and more financial assistance. Next, it will be $20,000, then $50,000, then it will be because free range artesian goat cheese costs have gone up, and before you know it, just about every whim will come with a federal grant. You know, like the National Endowment for the Arts?

There are others drawbacks, but I think you get the idea. Now, if you could explain it to the Left, we might be getting somewhere.

Right now, the Left is counting on the compassion card to get us not to think about the nagging questions of the wisdom of student loan forgiveness. For most of the population, it works. We don’t want to see people suffer, but there are also limits. If people suffer as a result of dumb decisions, our compassion tends to go the way of David Duke Appreciation Night at the Apollo. It’s the old “hand up, not hand out” mentality, and it still works today. I’m all for giving people a chance to apply themselves and earn some scratch from the sweat of their brows. Being allowed to have a chunk of your student loan that you’ve accumulated by studying Post Modern Albino Inuit Gender-Queer Photography in 16th Century Burma without even chipping a nail? Not so much.

And it’s not because I want college students to suffer under excessive debt. It’s because I want them to understand the feeling of earning something instead of just being granted it. Yes, not everybody will win a trophy under this mindset, but it will mean more when you do because you learn what you’re made of and what you’re worth. Platitudes and payoffs don’t teach you anything but how to whine until you get your way. That doesn’t make you anything but an asshole with the potential to be a Karen when you grow up.

And God knows we have enough of those as it stands.

The Taiwan Conundrum

While a lot of conservative commentators are focusing on domestic issues, there’s a foreign policy matter that deserves much more attention than it’s been getting. And would you believe we have Nancy Pelosi to thank for it?

I’m referring to the situation with Taiwan, mainly because Paul Pelosi’s drinking and driving isn’t an international incident…yet. When the Speaker of the House visited Taiwan recently (for reasons that escape me, unless she was setting up some primo deals that would earn her more money…I think I just figured it out!), it added Everclear to an already tense situation between Taiwan and China. See, China believes Taiwan is still a part of China and Taiwan disagrees, preferring to be independent from China. And given how China is a repressive totalitarian state whose leader looks like Winnie the Pooh, I can see why.

Where America comes into the picture is we are stuck between the two opposing sides of this conflict by our own actions stemming from a long time ago, or ancient history in TikTok terms.

We set the Wayback Machine to 1949, when Chinese communists defeated Chinese nationalists and took over mainland China. Since the nationalists weren’t too keen on reading Mao’s Little Red Book, they fled the country and set up shop in what is now Taiwan. Back in the days of the Cold War, America would vocally support Taiwan’s right to independence and try to get China to lay off, wouldya?

Then two Bushes and the Commander in Briefs happened.

The first Bush in question is George H. W. Bush, who was President during a time when Chinese students were protesting for government reform and freedom, culminating in a stand-off in Tienanmen Square. And by “stand-off,” I mean one student literally stood in front of a tank line, creating one of the most iconic moments of the 20th Century, if not of all time. Bush, to his credit, called for China to address its human rights violations (good thing China didn’t respond by saying “You first, dickweeds.”) and promised harsh sanctions if the Chinese government didn’t change its ways.

Annnnnnnd then Bush promptly backed down faster than an Internet tough guy whose bluff gets called. No human rights violations address, no sanctions, not even the ultimate of geopolitical smackdowns, a tersely-worded memo from the UN giving China 1248 more chances to shape up before another memo gets sent. The horror!

And if that assfucking wasn’t bad enough, Bill Clinton not only overlooked China’s human rights violations, but gave them Most Favored Nation status without China having to fix anything! For those of you playing along at home, Most Favored Nation status is basically the US saying they want to do a lot of business with a country because we think it would be in both countries’ best interests. Good thing that turned out so well or we’d be totally fucked right now…oh, wait.

And to complete this shit sandwich, George W. Bush decided it would be a good idea to sell a significant portion of our national debt to China in exchange for…well, nothing really. Now, I’m no Paul Krugman (which is actually a boon in this case since it means I know a thing or two about economics), but I believe that would give China significant leverage over us. Whether they would use it to fuck us over is a matter of some debate, but the fact we have this Sword of Damocles hanging over our heads in the first place isn’t a good thing. Even if China is buying our stuff.

Yeah, about that. Turns out China is on the good end of a trade deficit with us. The figures from just this year show we are importing far more goods from China than they are importing from us. And it’s a trend that’s been going on for quite a while. In fact, we have to go all the way back to 1985 to find an annual trade deficit where the two sides are even remotely close. And the last time we posted a positive trade deficit with China? April 1986.

In the interest of fairness, we haven’t exactly been wowing Taiwan with our goods, either. Even so, when you compare the deficits with China to the deficits with Taiwan, it’s clear we’ve been more willing to work with the dictators than the people we allege to support.

Then, there’s the whole One China policy. To put it simply, China believes it is the only legitimate government for China and Taiwan, and the rest of the world…agrees. In spite of our chest-thumping about supporting freedom worldwide (see the established squawking points re: Ukraine), America fucking sucks when it comes to walking the walk. We can’t even have political figures say whether Taiwan is a country without there being controversy.

Hey, Taiwan. Ask Israel for advice on how to deal with America’s fickle foreign policy. They might be able to give you some pointers and a discount on industrial drum-sized containers of KY Jelly.

It’s this kind of duplicitous dumbfuckery that makes it hard for anyone else around the world to take us seriously. Granted, Joe Biden already gave us the fast track on that long before he was President, but this is well beyond even Biden’s ability to fuck things up. This was a team effort.

Although it’s easy for me to sit behind a keyboard and bitch about the matters at hand, I understand the predicament America put itself in through bad economic planning, worse political gamesmanship, and an apathetic public wanting more faster and cheaper than we’re willing to wait to be produced ourselves. With China having both an impressive potential economic market and a pretty sizable bargaining chip, we have a built-in incentive not to piss them off under any circumstances. This puts Taiwan in a rough spot. Not only is one of the world’s largest military machines breathing down its neck like Joe Biden at an elementary school photo op, but the largest and most technically advanced military on the planet can’t be bothered to show up because we need cheap electronics.

With friends like us, who needs enemas? Or enemies, for that matter.

While Nancy Pelosi’s visit to Taiwan made for interesting news, it exposed a fundamental weakness in our foreign policy with Taiwan and China and reiterated an oft-repeated doubt among other countries when it pertains to the way we claim to support freedom, but only when it suits our interests. If there is a silver lining to Pelosi’s visit, it’s the fact even she couldn’t fuck up our foreign policy any worse than it already is.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

There’s a word Leftists don’t want to use right now, and for once it has nothing to do with Donald Trump. They’ve spent the better part of a year downplaying it, pretending it isn’t a thing, talking up how good the economy really is, and gaslighting anyone who doesn’t buy the happy talk or the memory-holing of this one little word.

Recession.

The Left may not want to talk about it, but we’re living it right now, so we need to be brave enough to tackle it head on.

recession

What the Left thinks it means – an economic downturn caused by Republican/conservative economic policies

What it really means – the direct result of shitty federal financial decisions

You know a situation is bad when the Left has to try to redefine a term it’s been using for decades to attack conservative Presidents. Right now, the Left has been running interference, saying the actual definition of a recession is much more nuanced and complex. In fact, it’s so nuanced and complex that not even Leftists can define it yet, but they know enough to tell us we’re not in one.

Meanwhile in the real world, there is a pretty simple definition. I’ve provided a link to a more detailed explanation, but the short version is two straight quarters (or six months, if you’d prefer) of economic downturn. And no matter how many Leftist fact rejecters…I mean checkers say otherwise, we are hip deep in an economic downturn. How do I know?

New York Times pundit and resident laughingstock in economist circles Paul Krugman.

See, Krugman says we should ignore the definition of a recession that’s been used for, oh, decades and use one that doesn’t make the Biden Administration look like dumbasses. And, remember, kids, this asshat is a Nobel Prize winner, as every Leftist looking to appeal to authority on economic issues will tell you.

But, the thing to remember is he’s wrong. A lot. I’m talking more than the world’s worst TV weatherman. He’s even had to admit he got a lot wrong about the current situation because no one could have predicted everything that’s happened recently, like Russia invading Ukraine and supply chain issues.

You know, shit economists are supposed to account for when making projections?

The easiest rule to apply to Krugman and most Leftists pontificating about economics is to listen to what they say, do the exact opposite, and rake in the cash. And in this world where almost nothing is a sure bet, this is the exception.

Of course, there is a political angle to denying the economic reality. With the economy diving more than Jacques Cousteau, voters are looking for answers, or at the very least somebody to blame. And who has been in power since things have gone south? Why, it’s Democrats and Leftists! Typically midterm elections aren’t good for the party in power, but add in a recession, inflation, and supply chain issues, and Democrats will be lucky just to walk away from the 2022 elections holding onto even some semblance of political power higher than It Takes a Village Idiot.

Therefore, the Left has a vested interest in muddying the waters and telling us we’re stupid if we don’t listen to them. If they can make enough voters believe the economic hellscape we’re living in right now a) isn’t happening, b) is happening, but is Republicans’ faults, or c) you’re a racist, Leftists can preserve their power for a little while longer. If they can come out of the midterm elections with a respectable showing (i.e. not being tarred and feathered), they can use that as momentum going into 2024 where they will have to defend 4 years of moronic decisions made by a man best suited to be retired, not President.

Good luck with that.

The downside to this approach is our pocketbooks have more of an impact on our voting decisions than some high-minded rhetoric by lowlife politicians. If we’re having trouble making ends meet as a direct result of the bad decisions of our elected officials (like, you know, not paying attention when their decisions wind up hurting voters’ pocketbooks), it tends to turn off a lot of potential voters. However, sales of torches and pitchforks may skyrocket. Invest wisely, my friends.

While our elected officials on the Left tell us the economy is fine, it’s important to remember they don’t know what they’re talking about because a) they can’t feel their way to a strong economy, and b) they really don’t know/care about the struggles John Q. Public face since they’re getting rich by doing next to nothing. All they care about is maintaining their cushy lifestyles by any means necessary. And if they have to roll up their tinted limousine windows to avoid looking at it, they will.

At least until it’s time to lobby for votes.

Ignorance can be excused to a point. (Exceptions may apply. I’m looking at you, Socialist Socialite!) Callousness cannot. Right now, it’s hard to tell which one is driving the Left’s obsession with not facing the economic reality facing us right now, but neither one makes them look very good.

If there are any Republican candidates reading this, let me give you an idea for a campaign ad. Just point to the high gas prices, high grocery costs, and low-IQ responses to them and say, “If you’re sick of this, vote for me and I will work to undo it all.” If you don’t win by at least 50 points, it will be a surprise.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

It’s April, and it’s time for one of the Left’s favorite activities to resume. Is it the start of Major League Baseball? Nope. Is it the NBA playoffs? No. Is it whining and complaining about the rich not paying their “fair share” in taxes?

Bingo.

The “fair share” drumbeats started up again like a Neil Peart drum solo recently when President Joe “I Helped My Son Get a Sweet Gig in Russia and All I Got Was 10%” Biden proposed a new minimum tax for billionaires (or more precisely hundred millionaires) of at least 20% on their actual income and any assets that have gained value but haven’t been sold yet. Sorry for the long sentence, folks, but to fully express the proposal, I had to be a little long-winded. Meanwhile back in the main topic, Leftists are happy with this proposal because they say it will help with the deficit. But, as you might expect, there’s a bit more to their love of taxes.

taxation

What the Left thinks it means – a means to pay for the services the government provides

What it really means – a way to punish people more successful than Leftists will ever be

Leftists thrive on negative emotions, but the coin of their realm is jealousy. Well, that and killing babies in the womb, but it’s hard to pay for massive government spending in baby parts. Besides, Planned Parenthood needs the money to buy exotic cars!

Where jealousy comes into play in regards to taxation is two-fold. First, the Left needs us to believe people like Elon Musk are gaming the system and, thus, taking advantage of the workers of America. Second, the Left blames any lack of progress in addressing societal ills on not getting enough money from the government. And as we’ve seen in recent decades, both facets work really well to get people to support higher taxes for the evil rich.

And I don’t just mean higher tax payments, either. The Left thinks the tax brackets are too low for the wealthy, so they are always looking for ways to jack up the tax rate to stick it to The Man. If you doubt this, ask a Leftist why they don’t support a flat tax, which would mean everybody would pay the same tax rate. Their answers range from “because everybody paying the same tax rate wouldn’t be fair” to “keep licking the fascist boots of the corporate overlords, you idiot.” But, really, it boils down to this.

Leftists use taxation as a purely punitive measure.

Remember the Left’s belief in a zero-sum game as it pertains to economics? If not, it’s the notion that there is a finite amount of wealth, so any time a rich person makes money it’s at the expense of a poor person. If so, it’s the same concept, but I’m far more apologetic for repeating myself. In either case, it’s based on a faulty premise: that there’s a finite amount of money. Anyone who has followed the expansion of the national debt can see the flaws in the zero-sum game idea.

But a little thing like being divorced from reality like they were Liz Taylor or Mickey Rooney won’t stop Leftists from pushing class hatred in the name of spending other people’s money. All they have to do is make the poor and middle class hate the rich and the lack of reality won’t matter. Needless to say, but necessary to type, this has worked well and continues to work.

Beyond income taxes, the Left has ways to punish the lower and middle classes through taxation. Yes, I’m talking about gax taxes. Contrary to popular Leftist belief, oil companies aren’t gouging people at the pump by jacking up prices. Based on current calculations, those evil greedy oil companies are making…pennies on the dollar with every gallon sold. That’s not a clever turn of a phrase, mind you. I’m talking literal pennies on the dollar (and unlike the kids of today, I do mean literally in the literal sense). And when you consider the costs oil companies incur to refine oil into usable fuel, it’s a wonder they even want to keep drilling.

On the other side of the equation, there’s an entity that rakes in far more money with each gallon of gas sold and incurs none of the risks and costs to get it. If you guessed the state and federal governments, you get a gold star! And these taxes affect the working class more than the upper class. You’re more likely to see Rosie O’Donnell successfully going through Weight Watchers than to see Bill Gates topping off his tank at the local Gas and Sip.

And you’re even less likely to see Leftists support suspending gas taxes right now. After all, it’s free money, and it’s a way to punish us for continuing to use the internal combustion engine instead of being able to fork over several thousand dollars to get an electric car or a hybrid…that would also use fossil fuels like gasoline to get from point A to pointless B. There’s that word “punish” again, kids!

Now, if you’re like me and not keen on paying more taxes than owed, the Left will try to guilt you into paying more by invoking patriotism. In fact, President Pudding Cup once said paying taxes was our “patriotic duty.” Who wants to be seen as not patriotic, right? Of course, this argument might be more persuasive if a) tax dollars were being spent on the country instead of pork programs with no practical application, b) we wouldn’t get in trouble with the IRS for non-payment, c) the government typically doesn’t get rid of old taxes because free money, d) around half of the American population pay little-to-no taxes in the first place, and e) the Left didn’t hate America so much. To be fair, I’m surprised Leftists don’t scream out in pain like vampires taking a holy water shower when they wrap themselves with the American flag.

Even if I grumble at paying taxes out of fear of the IRS giving me an anal cavity search without so much as dinner and a drink, I understand the need for taxation. There are some things we need to pay for, like national defense and infrastructure, because they’re in the Constitution and make sense to spend money on. (Try beating back the Chinese Army with pool noodles, oddly enough made in China.) Having said that, we need to start drawing a few lines before we’re taxed after we die…oh, wait.

Taxes are a necessary pseudo-evil. Like with fire or Auto Tune, they are tools whose use determines whether the results are good or bad. And when they’re used for the purposes of fostering hatred and jealousy, as they are with the President’s billionaire’s tax, there can be no good outcomes.

Except, of course, if you’re sitting on a few empty Swiss bank accounts.