Tag: 2026 mid-terms

Remember the old saying, “Everything’s bigger in Texas”? This week, we saw that was true of political theater.

In a rare mid-decade move, Texas Republicans drew up a redistricting plan that would result in 5 new Republican districts. And because he’s Trump, the President also weighed in, which only added fuel to the fire. As a result of all of this and to prevent a quorum, Texas Democrats took their balls (yes, even the women) and went home. And by home, I mean Illinois.

Because the Left can’t stop bringing up race, Texas Democrats and their national counterparts called this redistricting proposal into gerrymandering that will negatively affect…wait for it…minorities! And since the Left brought it up, we’re going to have to revisit gerrymandering for no other reason than to see the Left have fewer legs to stand on than the unluckiest pirate ever.

gerrymandering

What the Left thinks it means – the only way Republicans can win elections: dishonestly

What it really means – the only way Leftists can win elections: drawing districts like a toddler with a marker and a sugar rush

The concept of gerrymandering isn’t all that new and it started where good ideas and bad execution (i.e. the Big Dig, Ted Kennedy’s driving, the Boston Red Sox, etc.) sometimes go, Massachusetts. Back in the 19th Century, then-Governor Elbridge Gerry signed a bill in 1812 approving a radical redistricting plan for state senate. One Boston Gazette blurb later, and we have a term that’s still being used (or misused, as the case may be) to this very day.

Now, let’s deal with the elephant (and the donkey) in the room. In recent years, any redistricting meets the literal definition of a gerrymander, which is to redraw district lines to maximize the likelihood of one party overpowering all others. That’s part and parcel of modern politics because both major parties want to fuck each other almost as much as they love to fuck the rest of us. And nowhere is that more evident than in the legislative branch. Not so much in the Senate or the state-level equivalents of the Senate because of the way they’re structured, but with the other side?

It’s Fuck-You-Palooza.

If there’s a science to drawing Congressional districts, it’s closer to the Al Gore/Michael Mann “hockey stick graph” variety because the way they’re drawn makes no sense. But there is one thing that cannot be denied: it bears no resemblance to actually representing people in the best possible way.

And leading the way on this front are…Democrats. I know! I never saw this coming!

For decades, Democrats have been drawing districts to have more blacks in Congress because they believe only blacks can represent other blacks. Well, except if the candidate is a black Republican, that is. Then, apparently blacks can only be represented by white Leftists.

Anyway, the point is Leftist redistricting is a nightmare that makes it impossible for any Republican to get so much as a toehold, let alone a foothold, in any Democrat-run district. That makes it pretty much a hereditary kingdom where the leaders get to stay in power as long as they’re breathing, and sometimes even beyond.

That’s why the Texas Democrats running to Illinois to prevent a quorum falls flat for me. Their side has been doing this shit for decades without so much as a twitter (or is it X?) of concern. You see, when they do it, it’s perfectly fine, but when it’s Republicans doing it, it’s the end of democracy as we know it.

Of course, we don’t have a democracy to end, but that’s not the point. The point is Democrats have a double standard, which should surprise no one outside of the Leftist hivemind. This is evident in how Democrats have decided to do if the Texas redistricting plan goes forward. To combat gerrymandering, they’re…going to gerrymander some more.

Fucking brilliant.

The issue Democrats face (aside from being total vindictive asshats) is they’ve pretty much gerrymandered their states to the point there’s nowhere else to gerrymander. For example, California’s Congressional districts are dominated by the Left (which explains in part why the state is a shithole), but if Governor Gavin Newsom gets his way, California Republicans will have to contact the federal government to register as an endangered species.

And other states like New York and Illinois are threatening to follow suit. Although they’re not even on the list of most gerrymandered states, that’s for one pretty big reason: they’re already gerrymandered all to fuck. New York State has 19 Democrat-led districts to 7 Republican-led districts and Illinois has 14 Democrat-led districts to 3 Republican-led districts.

In other words, Democrat gerrymandering is about to crash headlong into the law of diminishing returns. And the maps are going to look even more screwed up, all because the Left has to say “Texas is gerrymandering? Well, fuck you, we’ll do it, too!”

Granted, we’re dealing with the balance of power in the House of Representatives. Right now, Republicans hold a 220-213 edge over Democrats with 2 vacant seats pending the results of special elections later this year. That means every seat now and potential seat in the future is essential. That is the driving force behind the Left and the Right going gerrymandering-crazy all of the sudden. The Right wants control to continue President Trump’s agenda and the Left wants control to hamstring it. Or, do like they did last time they had control of the House and throw up more impeachment bullshit that wouldn’t pass muster at a preschool debate.

Each state has the power to conduct its redistricting in a manner it sees fit, including committees, leaving it to the state legislatures, or some combination thereof. In some cases, that’s like letting your arsonist uncle Joe Bob plan the family barbecue. In others, it’s like letting your cannibal uncle Jim Bob do the same. Regardless, it makes for some odd thought patterns and a really awkward Thanksgiving dinner.

Although I do have to admit the idea of a redistricting commission is promising, but I don’t think it should be done by politicians. And with today’s political divide making the Hatfields and McCoys look like a minor quibble between Canadians, we can’t necessarily leave it in the hands of the people. Instead, I think it should be done by the only people in this country who understand what it takes to build something meaningful.

That’s right. I’m talking about Minecraft players. Redistricting is essentially Minecraft, the Home Game anyway, so why not take that step? It ain’t the worst thing you can do because we’re actually doing the worst thing you can do right now.

While the Left has every reason to complain about Texas’s redistricting and calling it gerrymandering, they have to realize they have some ‘splainin’ to do when it comes to their own practices and at least come up with an explanation that doesn’t involve blaming Trump.

In other words, they got nothing.