America turned 250, and you don’t look a day over 249!
Many, many years ago, your humble correspondent wrote a piece called “America the Pretty Nifty” which has been lost to time, and probably for the best. From what I can remember of it, it was a combination of a genuine appreciation for my country and occasional humorous and culturally relevant asides.
You know, like this, but funnier.
Although I’ve gotten older (as have my jokes), I still haven’t lost my love for America. Granted, when it comes to America, I’m a bit of a “homer” as the sports-minded might say. The most exotic location I’ve traveled to outside our borders was…Canada, which is basically Minnesota with more donut places. (By the way, Tim Horton’s kicks butt!)
But aside from my homertude, I can see a lot of good things about America. And, yes, I see we have some work to do, but like I did when I first broached the subject the plusses outweigh the minuses.
For example, America still has at least a concept of free speech, even if we don’t always practice it well. Still, we have it, among many other rights outlined in the Bill of Rights, the US Constitution, and if you can believe it, the secret recipe for KFC chicken. (Which is like saying Kentucky Fried Chicken chicken, but work with me here.) There are people in Europe getting in trouble for speaking out against immigration among other issues who could really benefit from our freedom of speech.
Connected to freedom of speech is freedom of the press. Granted, most of the press are pretty much stenographers for the Left, but for those handful of journalists who still understand the difference between a news article and an op-ed, it’s good we have it.
And speaking of the Left, we have a healthy-ish political system that welcomes the Left, the Right, and every ideology in between. Now, if we could only figure out how to get better quality politicians…
As we’ve seen from numerous online videos from Europeans visiting for the World Cup, we still have things the rest of the world doesn’t. Like truck stops that double as mini malls. And WalMarts. And food that shortens your life, but leaves you with a smile on your face as you see St. Peter.
Which brings us (albeit indirectly) to American health care. People talk about how bad it is (and that’s not without reason), but there’s only one Mayo Clinic, where people from around the world come and get exceptional care. Throw in Johns Hopkins, the Centers for Disease Control (as long as Dr. Fauci is required to stay at least 1000 feet from the entrance), MIT, and many other medical and technological institutions of higher learning.
And people willingly come here for that kind of education because it has heft to it. Sure, you may be able to get your medical degree from the University of South Padre Island and Spay and Neuter Clinic, but you’ll lose out on every job opportunity from someone who came to America and got the same degree.
I’m a driver at heart, and one of the best things about America is its scenery. Whether you’re traveling down the historic Route 66 or making your way through the Heartland on a two-lane highway, there are some amazing vistas to be seen if you take the time to appreciate them.
And then there are the cities! Such bustling hubs of commerce where you can buy everything from legal firearms and illegal drugs, often from the same people. Now that’s convenience, kids!
One of the most fascinating aspects of America is we don’t have a single national identity, per se. At the beginning of the 20th Century, America became a melting pot where different cultures added to our mutt-like existence. As of today, we still have that. Not everyone who comes here integrates into the culture as much as others, but those who do make us richer by extension.
And that explains why there are different “vibes” throughout the country. If you like an active, edge-of-a-knife lifestyle, there’s New York City. If you’re into more mellowness, there’s Southern California. If you want a more sylvan environment, head to the Pacific Northwest. Mountains, prairies, valleys, deserts, swamps, we have it all and then some!
And perhaps the best part of America? We can disagree on how great America is! I know there’s a segment of our population who absolutely hates everything about America and thinks if we did things their way we would be far better. We call these people Leftists, and we can make fun of them to our hearts’ content. And I do as frequently as I can! Try doing that in China. Not only will you be hungry and hour later, but you might find yourself in prison or worse.
That’s right. I’m talking about a one-way ticket to UC Berkeley.
No matter what the naysayers nay-say, I love America because it’s one of the best places in the world. I mean, we have two Disney-named theme parks, and the rest of the world has…well, they have a couple more, but the point is they wouldn’t have had their if we didn’t start the trend.
And who does the world call on to fix things around the globe? Here’s a hint: it ain’t France.
Happy 250th America!
