Typically, I prefer to discuss ideas rather than people here on the Lexicon. For one, talking ideas doesn’t lead to fractured relationships, hurt feelings, and getting called a heartless asshole. For another, ideas can’t lawyer up and sue me for shit. But there are times when a person stands up and demands you pay attention to him or her.
So, welcome to the Leftist Lexicon, Senator John Fetterman!
John Fetterman
What the Left thinks it means – a capable Democrat Senator fighting for the working man
What it really means – an incapable Democrat Senator appearing to fight for the working man when he isn’t fighting in stupid slap fights
Although you might not know it from his manner of dishevelment… I mean dress, Fetterman’s story is one of relative privilege. He attended Albright College, a private college in Pennsylvania, where the most recent tuition will set you back a cool $27,560 per semester. Oh, but they offer financial aid, so it totally makes it not an overpriced shithole where you only need a 3.05 GPA to be accepted!
For you Leftists out there and Senator Fetterman, that was sarcasm.
After receiving an MBA from the University of Connecticut and a Master of Public Policy from Harvard, Fetterman went into the insurance business, a pretty lucrative career because people will always do stupid shit. Then, he made the jump into politics, which has proven to be more lucrative because people will always ask him to do stupid shit and pay him money to do it. Starting out as the Mayor of Braddock, PA, Fetterman made a name for himself.
Not in a good way.
But that didn’t stop him! He was Lt. Governor and later ran for the US Senate in 2022, beating out Dr. Mehmet “Not the Wizard of” Oz, who was backed by former President Donald Trump. (More on that later.)
Since his election to the Senate, Fetterman has taken up a number of Leftist causes, but he’s still fighting for the working class! He even caused a stir recently due to his propensity to dress like he’s about to mow his lawn instead of representing the state of Pennsylvania. As a result of Republican complaints, that stalwart of decency Sen. Charles “Amy’s Lesser Known Relative” Schumer relaxed the Senate dress code so Fetterman could continue to look like a bum while getting paid a king’s ransom. Fetterman went so far as to make a deal with the “jagoffs in the House”: support Ukraine and not shut down the government and he’ll wear a suit on the Senate floor.
Hope you like what you elected, Pennsylvania.
Actually, that’s a bit harsh. There is plenty of blame to go around, from Dr. Oz being such a bad candidate Hillary Clinton sued him for plagiarism, to Donald Trump, who endorsed Oz over other more viable (and easily more articulate) candidates because…fame equals electability, I guess? Regardless of who you or I blame, the point is Fetterman is a Senator.
And a sham.
Pennsylvania has a blue collar reputation, earned from decades of hard working men and women in the steel industry and other such work-intensive jobs. And they can sense a bullshitter a mile away…usually. In this case, Fetterman convinced enough people to ignore his privileged past and just focus on him being one of them. He sounded the part (i.e. the previous Tweet with the word “jagoffs”), he looked the part, and he supported a $15 per hour minimum wage. He issued a press release supporting striking members of the United Auto Workers and even flew to Michigan to join the picket lines.
But it’s all an act. He’s going through the motions and saying the right things to keep his image of an everyman intact. All he has to do is hate the right people and things (i.e. the rich), and he’s set for life. Just like any other Senator today.
Although many others have commented on Fetterman’s mental faculties taking a hit since he had a stroke in 2022, I’m going to refrain from mocking that. First, it’s tacky. Fun, but tacky. Second, making fun of his issues will only help him appear to be a victim. That’s right, kids, Mr. Big Tough Average Joe plays the victim card like a blackjack dealer on truck stop speed working straight commission because…people made fun of him! Oh the horror!!!!!
Someone get Fetterman a fainting futon, stat!
That doesn’t speak well of Fetterman in the character department because it shows his willingness to exploit personal frailty for political gain. Sure, it’s funny when he garbles his words to the point Kamala Harris looks like William F. Buckley in the erudite speaking arena, but behind the verbal stumbles and occasional mental short circuits lies a man who is playing voters like a Stradivarius.
And if current approval ratings among Democrats are any indication, Fetterman is Itzhak Perlman in gym shorts.
But the same poll that shows Fetterman’s popularity with his own party also shows he’s not as well liked at home. I can only speculate as to why, but it’s clear Fetterman’s new Senator smell might be wearing off, leaving the odor of the Ghost of Cheeseburgers Past lingering in the air. Whether that will continue until he’s up for reelection in 2028 is also a matter of opinion. In the meantime, Pennsylvanians will have to get used to being represented by someone who looks like he could be asking you for spare change.
More to the point, however, John Fetterman is on the level of the Socialist Socialite as far as effectiveness: not very. But when you’re a Leftist darling, you can practically do no wrong until you fall out of favor. Just ask Cindy Sheehan, Kyrsten Sinema, and Bob Menendez. Although you might want to ask that last one sooner rather than later because he might be heading to prison soon. So, as long as Fetterman does what he’s told to do and attack those the Left want attacked, he should be fine.
Which fucking sucks because he’s so incompetent I’m surprised he hasn’t been tapped to be in the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration.
Month: September 2023
Paywall X
X, formerly known as Twitter, is looking into the possibility of charging users a small monthly fee to use the service. If this happens it will be the final death blow to the Social Media platform.
Twitter was my favorite Social Media outlet, back when it was young. It had no ads, it no gimmicks, just simple text and some attached images. Plain, simple, useful.
I have written before that I prefer the older forms of Social Media, before it even had a name. Email Groups, Blogs, and Internet Forums.
With these there is control of who sees your posts. Who comments on your posts. And even who is a member of the circle getting the posts. Now, of course, they can be sent on to other places as well.
All of the current Social Media outlets can be replaced. But not with the batch of clones that are out now that are mimicking the current popular platforms. Even now we have multiple Twitter clones out there and all fall short of the original.
Will X survive by charging all members a fee? I don’t think so. Most sites, even news sites, that have paywalls I personally browse away from the moment I hit that wall.
Are Paywalls good to have? It depends. Yes in some cases it is a good measure. In other cases, it is not. And for Social Media. It is a bad idea.
Quick Hits
I’m sorry there wasn’t a Leftist Lexicon entry this week. There were so many topics and not enough time to devote to delving into them. I don’t want to do a half-assed job of it, considering that’s what I do already. If I half-ass my usual half-ass job, you’re only getting a quarter-ass, and that’s not good enough. If I’m going to half-ass something, I’m going to half-ass it all the way, baby
To make up for the lack of a Lexicon entry, I’m bringing back one of my Quick Hits segments where I give my opinions on topics that are interesting (at least to me), but may not be able to be developed into a full blog post. Hope you enjoy!
GOP on Abortion – The Left has been talking about how Republicans can craft a winning message on abortion now that Roe v Wade has been relegated back to the states. And from what I’m hearing, some Republicans want the next President to do something on the federal level to protect babies in the womb.
Ummm…that’s what Roe v Wade was, kids. The Supreme Court just sent abortion rights back to the states and you asshats want to bring it back to the federal level? That’s proving what the pro-baby-death…I mean reproductive rights crowd said about you right. Don’t give them such an easy W.
The War in Ukraine – It’s still going on, and we’re still on the hook for billions of dollars until, well, we get tired of being Ukraine’s sugar daddy. People are starting to figure out there’s more to the Ukraine-Russia conflict than democracy. Namely, a lot of money for politicians who would love nothing more than to keep Ukraine in the fight if only to hide the covert business dealings.
During the second Gulf War, Leftists chanted “No blood for oil.” Now these same Leftists are practically chanting “All the blood for 10% for the Big Guy.”
UAW Strike – The big three automakers watched as members of the United Auto Workers union walked off the jobs due to the companies not meeting union demands. Among the union’s demands were a 40% pay raise over 4 years with an immediate raise of 20%. As someone who hasn’t seen more than a single-digit raise in, oh, ever, a 20% hike is impressive…in its stupidity.
Look, I know the Big Three made record profits, but that doesn’t make it automatically yours, regardless of what Puddin’ Head Joe tells you. Before you start holding out your hands expecting the Big Three to shower you with money, think about the expenditures side of the ledger. If I make $1 billion in profit and I spend $900 million of that to expand my business or make necessary adjustments to existing worksites, the profit side goes down a bunch. How are the Big Three spending these record profits? Until you can answer that question, don’t look for me on the picket lines.
Another union demand was a cost of living increase to match inflation. You know, the inflation created in large part by the idiots they helped elect in 2020?
And speaking of one of those idiots…
the Biden impeachment – Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy announced the initiation of an inquiry into whether Puddin’ Head Joe broke the law via influence peddling through Joe’s crackhead son, Hunter. (More on him later.) Well, the Left broke out the “sham impeachment” talk early and often, stating there was no evidence Puddin’ Head Joe broke the law. And they’re right…if you ignore all the evidence that literally exists.
But I will have to say the Left knows what a sham impeachment looks like, considering they did two of them to former President Donald Trump.
gun rights in New Mexico – After recent shootings in her state, New Mexico Governor Michelle Lujan Grisham issued an executive order banning the right to carry, citing a public health emergency. As you might imagine, this went over as well as the Botulism Special at Chipotle. Here’s how fucked up it got: Rep. Ted Lieu and poster boy for gun control David Hogg said Lujan Grisham was full of shit.
Since her initial fuck-up and subsequent doubling down, Lujan Grisham has amended her original order to restrict the right to carry only in public parks and playgrounds. And she vowed to keep looking for a way to make her fuck-up legal.
I’d wish you luck, Madam Governor, but I really don’t want to.
Elon Musk and Starlink – In their quest to make themselves look even more like their party mascot, the Left let their hate boner for Elon Musk get the better of them again as it relates to the Russia-Ukraine war. Seems there’s a groundswell of Leftists calling out Musk for…not letting Ukraine use his technology for their military gain. That bastard!
While the Left keeps trying to make the case Musk should be arrested for not being Ukraine’s bitch, they’re missing a pretty important concept: it’s his fucking toy! Last time I checked, we still had the right to refuse service in America, and since Starlink is specifically for residential internet use, Musk rightly said no when Ukraine asked to use it for military use. Whenever the government tries to force you to use a product or service, it winds up being a legal battle down the line, one the Left tends to lose.
Can you say “Obamacare” and “mask mandates”? I knew you could.
Muslims and the LBGTQIAABCDEFGHOWMANYMOREFUCKINGLETTERSAREWEGOINGTOADD+ community – The gay rights community has found itself a new opponent to add to the list of the opponents they already have: Muslims. News reports from across the country show more and more Muslims are standing up to the “Gay Mafia” and refusing to knuckle under to their demands. Now, I’m not ready to start praying to Allah, but I have to wonder if the Left ever saw this coming. I mean, it’s not like Muslims have strict religious doctrine surrounding homosexuahhhhhhh yes they do. And it’s not like it’s hidden, either. Even the most permissive Islamic sects aren’t keen on gay rights.
Apparently, those “Coexist” bumper stickers are as deep as the Left cares to go on this topic.
the Hunter Biden blues – Yep, First Fuck-Up Hunter Biden was finally brought up on federal gun charges after only getting a judicial slap on the wrist for what amounts to tax fraud. Of course, if someone from the IRS wants to show me where hookers and blow are tax deductible, I’d be willing to hear him/her out. Even the staunchest pro-gun control Leftists are saying the actual actions Hunter took aren’t usually prosecuted and, thus, are no big deal.
Let that dumbfuckery sink in for a moment. These fucknuckles are the ones who fought for these laws to be put on the books in the first place, but now that the President’s son is the one caught breaking the law, it’s become a race to see who can come up with the shittiest takes to minimize the damage it will do to Puddin’ Head Joe’s reelection campaign in 2024. And without going into too much detail, rest assured the Left sent their best to come up with the worst takes.
If this doesn’t prove the gun control side is motivated by everything but actual safety, nothing will.
a Tale of Four Titties – Politics and sex go hand in, well you know, and 2023 is no different. On the Left, we have Democrat candidate for the Virginia statehouse Susanna Gibson who offered users of a website called Chaturbate the opportunity to see her perform sexually explicit acts for money. On the Right, we have Rep. Lauren Boebert who was caught on surveillance camera getting frisky with her date at a performance of “Beetlejuice.”
Guess which one the Left and the media (but I repeat myself) have been talking about more. Spoiler Alert: it’s Boebert.
Regardless of where you come down on the political spectrum, we’re coming into an age where this type of sexual shit is going to become more prevalent, and being prudish (or faux prudish for political means) isn’t going to make people act better. The sooner we come to terms with the fact adults like to fuck other adults, the sooner we can move onto more important issues, like how to unfuck our economy. Grow up, people!
And last, but certainly least…
Meet the Press boycott – It was a new era on television, as Kristen Welker took over the failing political news/talk show “Meet the Press” this week. And who was one of her guests? Donald Trump.
Well, let’s just say the Left wasn’t happy Welker gave the former President a platform by which he could…talk about his ongoing 2024 Presidential campaign. See, Leftists (who are totes pro-freedom and not at all fascist) have been trying to find a way to disqualify Trump from running again, and they saw the sit-down interview as a slap to their collectivist faces. And now, these Leftists are going to boycott the show…even if all 14 faithful viewers won’t notice the difference.
And if the power goes off in the coma section of the hospital, that number is gonna drop hard.
Well, I hope you enjoyed this brief look at the wonderful wacky world of American politics, law, and culture. See you soon!
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
Normally, your friendly neighborhood blogger spends time writing about politics or social issues that deserve to be mocked. This week I’m stretching my legs a bit to go into the tech world…to mock it.
Artificial Intelligence, or AI for short, has taken the world by storm, and by storm I mean CAT 4 Billion hurricane. Although the technology being used now to create AI bots online is at tin-cans-connected-by-string level, it’s starting to get better. And it’s starting to get people worried.
So worried that the Puddin’ Head Joe Administration put Vice President Kamala Harris the AI Czar. Who better to discuss Artificial Intelligence than a real dumbass?
Needless to say (which is why I’m typing it), the Left is starting to feel the heat from the rise of AI. Which means it’s the perfect subject…to mock them.
AI
What the Left thinks it means – a technological advance that will negatively affect the arts, human interaction, and social issues
What it really means – a computer pretending to be human…for now
The concept of AI has been around since last century in science fiction and other fantastic stories, but it didn’t really come into being until 1954, when Allen Newell, Cliff Shaw, and Herbert Simon came up with a program called Logic Theorist, which attempted to duplicate the thought processes of a human. When it was unveiled two years later, it was heralded as a breakthrough, as it should have been.
From there, AI experienced highs and lows, advances and setbacks, peanut butter and jelly. Once the matter of computer storage was resolved, AI truly began to come into its own, thanks to a little computer known as Deep Blue. In 1996, IBM pit the computer against chess champion Garry Kasparov in a chess match which Deep Blue shockingly won. This was the first sign AI was not only possible, but had the potential to outperform humans.
Do you want SkyNet? Because this is how we get SkyNet.
Seriously, though, in the nearly 30 years after Deep Blue, AI has found its way into society, tech and non-tech alike. The currently striking screenwriters are afraid AI will replace them. (Given the absolute dog shit Hollywood has been putting out the past two decades, though, I’m not sure it’s that big of a loss.) “South Park” devoted an episode to ChatGPT where part of the script was written by it. Even art is seeing AI’s slow creep into its hallowed halls.
And earlier this month, Warner Music signed the world’s first AI generated pop star, Noonoouri. The song, “Dominoes,” is about what you would expect. Words strung together to a beat with a noticeable hook that’s easy to like. In other words, just like pop music today, but with more natural singing.
I have a lot of questions, not the least of which being how a computer program can get paid by a studio to produce music, but the point is still AI has found its way into our culture in a new way: through shitty music.
But it’s not all virtual sunshine and online lollipops for AI. A recent poll showed over 60% of people surveyed view AI as a threat to our future. Others feel their jobs could be negatively affected by the rise of AI just in California alone. Although AI has the potential to revolutionize many vital fields like medicine, the fear of AI replacing humans is real.
And this is where I throw a wet blanket on the fearmongering. Ain’t I a stinker?
The thing to remember about AI is it’s only as good as the people programming it and the program’s ability to react to new data sources. That’s why I said we were still at the tin-cans-connected-by-string level earlier. The technology is still relatively new and is getting better at an astounding rate with no ceiling as yet as to how much better it will get, but it’s still limited by human intelligence and biases.
Take facial recognition software, for example. One of the most well-known problems with it can be tied to unconscious racial biases, which can only be programmed by…humans with these biases. The program isn’t capable of it; it’s just doing what it’s been told to do as quickly as possible.
That’s AI’s Achilles’ heel, folks. AI as it stands right now is only capable of following orders within the parameters of the program itself. The “learning” it’s doing is by design, which means the data can be manipulated or controlled. Just ask Microsoft how its AI chatbot turned into a racist by going on Twitter.
Although it’s nice to see us applying more caution to AI than we did when the Internet became a thing, we need to ratchet back the fear and loathing going on right now. Yes, it has the potential to make some industries go by the wayside, but potential is not certainty. Every piece of technology we have has a due-by date. At some point in the future, it will become obsolete, and everything connected to that technology has to either evolve or become just as obsolete.
This is where free market capitalism comes into play. Any worker with his or her salt can adapt to changing conditions out of no other reason than economic necessity. He/she will gain new skills, learn new techniques, develop new attitudes and processes that will safeguard his/her job and possibly propel him/her to a new position. The grind may not always net these results, but they certainly help you look more indispensable.
This is not to say the writers, artists, etc., who are afraid for their jobs in the AI-crazy world aren’t working hard to hold onto them. They are. I’m saying their energies should be focused on ways to make them stand out in a good way. Instead of trying to figure out how to redo “Romeo and Juliet” with a modern twist or doing the 35 billionth representation of man’s inhumanity to man, find a way to bring an original idea to the forefront. Sure, you risk rejection, but the law of averages says at some point your original idea is going to resonate with someone.
As far as AI is concerned, I’m staying cautiously optimistic. Until an AI bot becomes self-aware and capable of overruling its programing, humanity will be safe. That’s not to say nothing’s going to change, but as long as humans keep being imperfect little meat puppets, we will always have the edge over any AI.
And if you really want to fuck with AI, make it only access Reddit. That will confuse it long enough for someone to pull the plug.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
It’s really easy to go with the flow, especially when the rest of society seems to follow suit. We typically don’t like conflict because it’s usually more hassle than it’s worth. But there are times when the masses are asses (because the M is silent) and a person decides not to go along to get along.
In the world of women’s sports, Riley Gaines is just such a person. An accomplished student athlete, Gaines came into prominence for expressing concern over trans swimmer Lia Thomas dressing with and swimming against biological women, as well as the way the NCAA treated her when she tied Thomas in the 2022 NCAA Women’s Championships. And for that, she’s become a lightning rod for Leftists who want to paint her as transphobic.
After a recent ass-raping…I mean online conversation with Keith “Don’t You Know Who I Am?” Olbermann, I decided to take some time to delve into the Left’s hate boner for Riley Gaines.
Riley Gaines
What the Left thinks it means – a bitter former swimmer who is using transphobia to grift the right wing into ignoring her failures as a swimmer
What it really means – an actual feminist, not the Leftist mutant variety
At the heart of this aquatic controversy is a simple question, one the Left can’t seem to answer: what is a woman? Naturally, you would think the Party of Science would be able to use, you know, science to provide insight and logic in a response. You would think that, but you’d be wrong.
See, the Left can’t rely on the science here because it would confirm what everyone who doesn’t reside in Delusionville has been saying from the start: there are only 2 genders. Because of this, the Party of Science has to be unscientific and muddy the genetic waters to allow for trans people to identify as whichever gender they want without having to deal with the hassle of actually being said gender.
Now, throw in the physical and psychological differences between men and women, put all of this into the athletic arena, and you’ll get…one confusing gender gumbo. The thing is you don’t need to be a scientist to know men and women have physical differences that would play a factor in the outcomes of athletic contests. You know…like, oh I don’t know…swimming.
Consider something as simple as arm span when it comes to swimming. Although there are some women whose spans can rival those of men, more often than not the advantage will go to the men. Longer arm span generates more force that will propel the swimmer further and potentially faster in the pool. Put in a way even Leftists can understand: biological men, regardless of how they identify, will have more of an edge in the pool.
And before you Leftists try to “correct” me saying Thomas was transitioning at the time, it is noted she started to take hormones after coming out as trans in 2018. Even so, she retained the body of a biological male. See, hormone treatments don’t affect biology in that way. They can affect the way one looks, but they don’t change muscle density, bone structure, or genetics. Until you can affect that, it’s still a man, baby, as can be corroborated by eyewitnesses.
Like Riley Gaines.
Gaines is reviled for standing up for women’s sports, not because she’s a transphobe, but because she’s cuts through the Left’s bullshit when it comes to trans women in sports. She’s been directly affected by the Left’s “conform or be cast out” approach in spite of tying Thomas. Since she can’t be silenced, the Left have taken a new approach: paint her as a sore loser.
Just like Keith Olbermann, Nebraska state Senator Megan Hunt, and pro-trans Leftists did.
Now, if I remember Leftist squawking points correctly, we’re supposed to believe women when they’ve been assaulted. Also, if we attack women, it’s because we’re misogynists afraid of strong, outspoken women. So, what would that make Leftists attacking Gaines?
Hypocrites. The judges would have also accepted “assholes.”
What it doesn’t make them is feminists, not even in the Leftist sense of the word. It wasn’t that long ago that Leftists were at the forefront of women’s rights, even to the point of pushing female supremacy. Sure, they’ll pay lip service to the pro-baby death…I mean “pro choice” movement, but what has that gotten them?
Cash. Lots and lots of cash.
And the thing is Gaines isn’t even what the Left would consider a feminist because they have expanded the definition to include women who were born men. However, Gaines is a classical feminist in the sense she wants to have as much of a shot at success as men do. Too bad the NCAA and the Left want to keep women down.
After all this time, it’s taken men who claim to be women to make Leftist feminists bend the knee in the name of inclusion and diversity. Isn’t it ironic, doncha think?
Although Riley Gaines is swimming against the current, she’s made headway in getting people to recognize the issues with trans women competing with biological women in athletics. This is going to make her famous, infamous, and a target for unnecessary vitriol, all at the same time. But as any martyr will tell you, the righteousness of the cause provides an unshakable courage that will carry you through any rough times. Of course, in order to be a martyr, you have to die for your cause, so talking to them might be an issue unless you have a great metaphysical roaming plan through your cell phone provider.
While you get that sorted out, just consider there are more and more people taking up for Gaines quietly because of the way the Left and the trans community coerce people into submission. But if you think you can suffer the slings and arrows of outrageously stupid Leftists, add your name to the chorus and let the world know you want women to compete against women.
Especially if there’s a kiddie pool full of Jello involved.