Another week, another round of Senate hearings over the nominees President Donald Trump has put forward for consideration. And that’s on top of the other bullshit that’s been going on with Executive Orders, illegal immigration, and, oh yeah, Leftist freakouts over it all.
But one of the craziest shitstorms came during the nomination hearing for Trump’s nominee for the Department of Health and Human Services, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Between Chief Running Mouth Senator Elizabeth Warren sticking up for Big Pharma while sounding like a shrew (to be fair, that’s her everyday voice) and Senator Bernie Sanders shitting his onesie over literal onesies, I was reminded why I hold politicians in such low esteem: they make the functioning humans look bad.
While the Senate treated us to some of the worst theatrics this side of an off-off-off-off-Broadway production of “Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark” done by Miss Reedy’s second grade class, there was another massive figure in the Senate chamber (aside from Senators’ egos) that had as much to do with the theatrics as it did the confirmation hearing itself. I’m talking of Big Pharma, the entity every Leftist hates…or do they?
Big Pharma
What the Left thinks it means – an entity that makes people suffer with illness so they can make a buck
What it really means – an entity that provide both a punching bag and a source of income for Leftists
America has a health care problem, several actually. One of the biggest ones is Americans typically don’t give a fuck about health care until they don’t get it for one reason or another. A lot of this can be traced back to our society where we want to do the least amount of work for the most amount of benefit. I mean, if there’s a pill or a shot we can take so we can fill our gullets with deep fat fried unknown chicken parts smothered in gravy (because the chicken makes it healthy), we’ll go that route every time.
That’s where Big Pharma comes in. Like most business models, the end goal is to create profit whenever possible. And when you have a business model that requires people to be less-than-healthy, that profit comes from human suffering. Or at least the concept of human suffering. Although modern medicine can and has developed ways to help improve the lives of those afflicted with diseases or conditions, Big Pharma has also sold us on the idea we can live better lives if we just inject this or ingest that. Now, Mom, Dad, Billy, Suzie, Grandma Mabel, and the family dog Scruffy can live a better life free from the annoying and personally devastating effects of…whatever malady they can come up with to sell their products.
This is where the Left actually has a point other than the ones on top of their heads. Pharmaceutical companies can be a bit on the shady side, which is like saying Michael Moore is a little husky. As much of a capitalist as I am, I can’t really say the way Big Pharma does business is legit. Even if your drug is going to be a game-changer, it’s hard to reconcile the good it will do with the bad it takes to get there. Overall, you need to have a real moral vacuum in your soul to be a Big Pharma employee.
And that brings us to Congress.
To put it mildly and geekily, Capitol Hill makes Mos Eisley look like Amish country. And for any Amish readers out there, I’m sorry for comparing you to Capitol Hill. Also, how in the fuck are you reading this?
Anyway, one of the areas where Big Pharma has a lot of power is in Congress. And in the halls of Congress, money talks to both sides. Remember this for later because it will come in handy.
Although Big Pharma swings a big…hypodermic needle, there are some who see what they do and aren’t afraid to speak out. One of those individuals is…the aforementioned Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Regardless of what you think of the man, the fact remains he puts his money where his mouth is and promotes good science when it comes to vaccines. Now, who would be opposed to that?
Big Pharma. And their minions in Congress.
When you take on a big entity like Big Pharma, you put a big target on your back and expect to hit once in a while. If you’re connected to Donald Trump in any way, you might as well grab a helmet because you’re going to get bombarded.
Just ask RFK Jr.
Fortunately for him, the metaphorical sharpshooters (i.e. Senate Democrats) are the Gang Who Couldn’t Shoot Straight. With every gotcha question, every bit of theatrics, and every bit of disregard for parliamentary decorum, Kennedy looked and sounded like the adult in the room. Mainly because, well, he was.
But there’s another tie that binds the Senate Democrats questioning Kennedy together. Remember what I said earlier about Big Pharma playing both sides? Yeah, each of the Senate Democrat big hitters are Big Pharma puppets.
Chief Running Mouth? $822,573 from 2019 to 2020.
Bernie Sanders? Almost $2 million since 1990.
Ron Wyden? $351,513.
Maggie Hassan? $313,576.
Angela Alsobrooks? $96,643.
Tim Kaine? $200,824.
And the shits keep coming! All of these Democrat Senators going after RFK Jr. for trying to hold Big Pharma accountable…all having a financial stake in protecting Big Pharma from people…like RFK Jr. How do it work????
Quite well if you’re a fucking hypocrite.
With both major parties beholden at least in part to Big Pharma, you’re more likely to hear Mazie Hirono ask a salient question than you are to get Big Pharma to shape up. But with Donald Trump pushing for a Make America Healthy Again and Robert F. Kennedy Jr. heading it up, there’s a chance it could happen.
Especially if the Leftists continue to bring their meh game.
Tag: senate hearings
Extremist Makeover: Congressional Hearings Edition
If you’re like me (and if you are, I’m sorry), you’re tired of watching Congressional hearings. Whether it’s a Presidential appointee or a witness addressing the ever-important question of who let the dogs out, the script never changes.
1. The Congresscritters who support what the person says/believes throws more softballs than at any given summer weekend.
2. The Congresscritters who reject what the person says/believes will come up with the most bizarre “gotcha” questions designed to make them look like they know what they’re talking about. (Spoiler Alert: if they’re in Congress, it’s usually a good bet they don’t.)
3. Both sides get to crow about how well their Congresscritters did.
4. Nobody changes their minds and votes usually fall along party lines.
5. Congresscritters get paid for doing next to nothing.
Clearly, this is not ideal by any stretch of the imagination, especially from an entertainment perspective. If there’s no mystery about the outcome, you run the risk of being predictable and the audience looking for something else to watch. The attention span of many adults is shorter than that of a ferret high on truck stop speed and with a pure espresso and cane sugar IV drip. So, we have to find a way to hook people early and keep them hooked. And since cocaine is neither free nor legal, that idea is out the window.
One tack to take is to turn every hearing into a reality show. Granted, there’s a good chance the boneheads in DC will find a way to screw this up, but there’s a reason shows like “Big Brother” and “Survivor” keep getting renewed: we get to see people at their best and worst. The human drama is the best drama we have and often we don’t need to do much to bring it out. In most cases, all it takes is for the barista to get your order wrong for it to come flowing out.
A Congressional hearing made like a reality show would be a way to get more eyes on the product and make it more exciting. But we can’t stop there! We will need a panel of judges to point out the high and low points of each person, both Congresscritter and witness/nominee. Plus, it will give Simon Cowell work for the rest of his life, so that’s a draw right there! Just get two or three more people and you have your panel.
And of course, there’s sex. Sex sells, so we have to find a way to add a bit of spice (Channel, that is) to the proceedings. Since people can and usually are dragged through the mud during their hearings, why not bring actual mud into the equation? That’s right, boys and girls, I’m talking about mud wrestling! Granted some of the matches we’d get would be like watching the ladies from “The View” in a burlesque revue, but there are some that would make it well worth the wait. It could also be used to settle squabbles between Congresscritters. Imagine if Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton had taken their disputes into a kiddie pool full of mud instead of dueling. History would be forever changed, and a lot more exciting!
Of course, this approach may remove the gravitas of the hearings, but I would argue it was already removed before I got involved. However, I do understand that concern and I have another solution, and we can all be a part of it. Every chair in the hearing room gets wired to a light, but noticeable electric shock. If the audience feels a Congresscritter or a witness/nominee isn’t telling the truth, is avoiding the question, or is acting the fool, we get to push a button and shock them! Not only will it increase audience participation, but there’s a chance it could work as negative reinforcement so they behave. Get shocked enough, and even the most offensive Congresscritter would get straight and fly right.
Elizabeth Warren and Adam Schiff, consider this your warning.
There’s one more alternative I can give that would remove the clowns from this Congressional three-ring circus The Constitution states the Senate has the right of “advice and consent” when it comes to federal nominees, but it doesn’t say how this advice and consent has to be given. With the advent of social media (and, yes, I guess that counts Bluesky), do we need to spend the time, money, and room space to hold a hearing? This can be done over Zoom, Teams, or any other teleconferencing service and the nominees won’t even need to get out of their pajamas if they choose. Imagine a candidate for the Secretary of Education being grilled while in a Spongebob onesy! Not only would it be cute and enjoyable, but it would elevate the perception of Congressional hearings.
Of course, the politicians would hate this idea because FaceTime wouldn’t give them the media facetime they need to feed their egos. All the more reason to do it!
Let me know if you have any other ideas on how to improve Congressional hearings!
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
With the incoming Trump Administration, there are going to be a lot of confirmation hearings for his Cabinet. And without exception, Leftists are obsessed with qualifications. To hear them speak (and I’m not sure why you would want to), none of Trump’s appointees have the basic qualifications to tie their own shoes, let alone run a section of the American government.
Let’s just say the irony is not lost on your humble correspondent.
But what exactly do Leftists mean when they talk about qualifications? Good question, and I hope I have a good answer, or at least an answer entertaining enough that you won’t throw your computer in the dumpster.
qualifications
What the Left thinks it means – important characteristics that show someone is capable of doing the job
What it really means – qualities politicians have little room to talk about
First, a bit of a rabbit hole to set up the shitshow proper. Under the Constitution, the Senate has the responsibility of advice and consent. Under normal conditions, this can be a useful tool to determine whether a potential government official has the knowledge, background, and judgment necessary to fulfill the duties of the role. Under current conditions, it’s a way for know-nothing assholes to preen for the cameras and look for their “gotcha” moments. And that’s when the Senate is being less horrible than usual.
Through this advice and consent process, nominees get dragged in front of Senate committees and either given more ball gagging than on a gay porn set (not that I know anything about that, mind you) or a gauntlet of nonsensical, partisan bullshit questions that makes you wonder if the Senators asking them actually want to hear from the nominee.
In other words, any given Tuesday on Capitol Hill.
The reason qualifications is such a buzz word recently is because Democrats and Leftists want to make the public at large believe everyone Trump nominates is dumber than a bag of hammers, even if they have more experience than the assholes asking the questions. And when these assholes aren’t asking gotcha questions, they’re heading to their favorite media outlets to brag about what they did, and so they can get their balls sucked.
Yes, even the women, or for any Leftist reading this, birthing people.
Although we would like to get the best people for the job, there’s one significant hurdle: the best people for the job wouldn’t take it because it would be a downgrade. For most people, getting a cushy government job where you couldn’t get fired even if you tried would be a dream. But within that dream, there is the nightmare of being stagnant. Great ideas rarely get implemented, excellence is seen as a detriment, and good employees are pushed to be as mediocre as they can be. And qualifications? It’s more about connections or other factors unrelated to the job than it is about whether you can do it.
That’s one of the reasons I chuckle when the Left starts talking about how unqualified Trump’s appointees are. Leftist hate achievement and want everybody to be equally…meh. Just check the right boxes and you, too, can be the Undersecretary of Beverage Acquisition for the Undersecretary of Waste Disposal under the Secretary of Environmental Justice, Transgender Division. In other words, you’re getting coffee for trash collectors under someone who got a shitty degree that couldn’t get you hired by a temp agency.
And it might give you a fast track to being in Congress or some President’s Cabinet if you play your cards right. Just ask Pete Buttigieg.
Which brings me to another reason I’m chuckling a lot at Leftists demanding Trump’s appointees be qualified: they’re responsible for confirming some of the Brick Tamland Administration’s worst picks, like Pete Buttigieg as Secretary of Transportation. Not to pick on Mayor Pete here, but what in the wide world of fuck were his qualifications? Fixing roads in South Bend, Indiana.
Let’s ask the people of East Palestine, Ohio, how they feel about his qualifications for Secretary of Transportation. That is if you can get them to drop their pitchforks and torches at the mention of his name.
The fact many of the same Senators who question the qualifications of Trump’s appointees thought nothing of the lack of qualifications of many appointees of the Brick Tamland Administration makes me want to tell them to take a seat, but that wouldn’t be any fun.
That comes when you ask these sanctimonious assholes obsessed with qualifications to pontificate on the California wildfires, where the people in charge aren’t qualified to run a free water outlet in the desert, let alone fighting a major fire. I would particularly like to hear from new Senator Adam Schiff, one of the ones who keeps warning us about the dangers of having incompetent people in positions of power. Or he could just look in the mirror to see an incompetent person in power.
Yeah, I went there. And I’ll continue to go there so much, I’ll get my mail forwarded there.
The whole kerfluffle over qualifications right now is based on partisanship, just like it has been with previous appointees from both sides. As much as I like Ted Cruz (which is slightly more than I like most politicians), his questioning of Ketanji Jackson Brown over issues like Critical Race Theory only feed into the problem. Which gives me an idea for an Extremist Makeover, but that’s a blog post for a different time.
In the meantime, it should be pointed out these hearings are like the plot of a horrible mystery novel: you know what’s going to happen before we get to the end because it’s so fucking obvious. Democrats are going to vote against the nominees, Republicans will vote for the nominees, both sides are going to claim victory, and the qualification kerfluffle gets tossed aside.
And we’ll get stuck with the results.
So, yay, I guess?