Being a Leftist in the second Donald Trump Presidency has to be rough. Not only do you have to deal with knowing the man you’ve tried to sue into oblivion is in the White House again, but you’re whiny pussies on top of it. Because or in spite of this, Leftists have taken up the mantle of being “the resistance,” which gives them a source of inspiration to do things.
Like vandalizing Tesla vehicles.
And with a cable news network giving these actions a resistance tag, it’s bound to empower more Leftists to resist.
On the bright side, it gives me a opportunity to mock them!
resistance
What the Left thinks it means – standing up to the fascist/authoritarian Trump Administration and conservatives
What it really means – Leftist pussies cosplaying as badasses
Back in the heady days of 2017, Leftists were coming off a stunning upset after Trump beat former First Lady, Secretary of State, and general horndog enabler Hillary Clinton. As any mature adult would do, they looked back at the loss, recalibrated their strategy, and came back with a new approach to winning elections.
I’m kidding. They started pretending to be fictional characters.
Whether it was invoking the Rebel Alliance from “Star Wars” or Lord Voldemort from the Harry Potter books (before they decided J. K. Rowling was too toxic for…checking my notes…standing up for biological women against transgender women), the Left went into full-blown delulu mode. This served a few purposes, not the least of which was making themselves into the heroes and, by extension, their actions righteous. This made even their most egregious actions justifiable in their eyes since the “evil” they were fighting against was worse.
Ah, moral relativism. Ain’t it great?
Empowered by their self-righteous indignation, the Left was able to parlay that into action, namely riots…I mean protests. Whether it was the George Floyd protests, Black Lives Matter, or taking over a section of Seattle and setting up an autonomous zone (CHOP/CHAZ for the people playing along at home), Leftists were able to grab attention and headlines.
Oh, and a few criminal charges. You know, for being dumbasses.
With the second Trump Presidency underway, the “resistance” has gone back to their old habits and become assholes again. When they aren’t going after Tesla vehicles (and the people inside them), they’re organizing protests in each state and boycotts. Because nothing sticks it to The Man like…gathering in public areas with signs and not shopping.
Don’t look at me. It doesn’t make any sense to me either.
And that’s pretty much the problem with the resistance we’re seeing these days. The closer you look at it, the less sense it makes. Sure, there are some causes like trans rights, immigration, and whatever the fuck Representative Jasmine Crockett says on any given day, but most of it is a patchwork of smaller causes coming together to fight fascism, authoritarianism, or whatever the fuck Representative Jasmine Crockett says on any given day.
And speaking of faux edgelords, another way the resistance is making itself known is through politicians using vulgarity. Granted, I don’t have a leg to stand on here because I can swear like a sailor with Tourettes sometimes, but then again I’m not Chuck Schumer or Elizabeth “Chief Running Mouth” Warren. Namely, old people. Watching Schumer and Warren do their watered down impression of Andrew Dice Clay while talking about political issues isn’t edgy; it’s cringy as fuck.
And if you’re watching Chuck and Liz, you’re not Betty White. She could pull off being vulgar at an advanced age. You can’t. You’re as edgy as a Nerf ball when you swear just to be swearing.
In other words, keep it up, you two! You’re doing great!
While I’m waiting for Bernie Sanders to break out an f-bomb during a speech, I can see where the resistance is headed: to the same junkyard Occupy Wall Street wound up. Although we still remember the name, they didn’t accomplish anything. I mean, aside from proving Leftists could fuck up a one-step instruction manual when left to their own devices.
The only thing that gives me pause is how violent the Left can get when pushed. Granted, you can push most Leftists pretty far by merely existing, but most of the time they won’t try to fight back. That is, unless they have the advantage. Just ask Kyle Rittenhouse. Even then, they are at a distinct disadvantage because they vastly overestimate their ability to avoid retaliation. The thing about engaging in violent behavior is there is always a chance for the other party to engage in violence right back. Just ask Moldylocks.
And as much as I would like to say Leftists know how to fight, let’s just say they make Pee Wee Herman look like Chuck Norris. And I mean right now, not when the former was…enjoying an adult movie a little too much. Maybe some of the trans women can teach the Left how to fight, provided you use their proper pronouns or else things could get messy.
Just remember, kids, trans women are women. Just bigger, stronger, taller, and overall more masculine women.
There is one constant with any type of Leftist resistance: the Right will always be on the hook for violence. No matter how much blood gets spilled from Leftist attacks, how much intimidation Leftists inflict on others, or how much property gets damaged as a result of one of their temper tantrums, the Right will always be seen as the ones who are most likely to commit violent acts. In fact, Representative Maxine Waters even said Trump wants a civil war to break out.
This is after Leftists vowed to get more aggressive in opposing Trump’s plans. Oh, and the number of Leftists who wanted Trump dead in one form or another.
You sure it’s the Right that’s getting violent? Because I would think you would know, considering the Right has more guns.
In the end, there are very few Leftists who are actual badasses. Seriously, if you can make a Leftist run for a safe space by eating Chik-fil-A in front of them, he/she/it poses no real threat to life and limb. Some “resistance.”
Having said that, the best advice I can give you is to be aware of your surroundings and the situation. Leftists will do anything in their power to get you to react badly to what they say or do. They want you to throw a punch or shove them because then they can claim to be the victims. And as long as there’s at least one more Leftist to corroborate the story, you will be the villain. Don’t give them that satisfaction. Don’t go looking for trouble.
If you must engage, keep a cool head about you. The worst thing you can do to a Leftist who wants to start shit is to not even acknowledge it. Shrug it off and go on with your day. If you want to take your chances, try the Thomas Two-Step Program for Dealing With Leftists.
Step 1: Point
Step 2: Laugh
Do not attempt to do this if you are mobbed by Leftists or the Leftist in question is bigger than you are because physical harm may come to you. If you need to, bring a hoss of a man with you to be your second. That way you’ll not only have some muscle to protect you if the Leftists want to start shit, but also have a witness to counteract the Leftists’ victim narrative.
Plus, you’ll have one other person who can also point and laugh, so triple bonus!
In the end, though, the current Leftist resistance is as dangerous as walking through a Leftist’s gated community with a “Coexist” t-shirt on. At least until they call security on you for trespassing in their neighborhood, but you get the point. And just like the resistances before them, the current one will end up with a lot of assmad Leftists, a lot of side-splitting laughter from the Right, and nothing actually getting done.
Fine by me!
Tag: occupy wall street
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
With springtime finally here (check local listings for the springtime in your area), college campuses (or would that be campusi?) are abuzz with activity. Sure, some are preparing for finals, dissertations, and summer internships, but many are taking the nice weather to…protest a war half a world away.
Yes, from sea to shining sea, student activists are rising up to show support to Palestine in its war against those evil mean nasty no-good Israelis. And Leftists are eating it up, or at least they’re trying to have it catered because “humanitarian aid” or some such bullshit. The Leftists of yesterday are enjoying the Leftists of today as the latter group does its best to LARP as the former.
But one of these things is not like the other. And none of these things belong on a college campus. Let’s delve into the wonderful world of protests.
protests
What the Left thinks it means – demonstrations designed to raise awareness and initiate desired social change
What it really means – college students being assholes
The right to protest is solidified in the First Amendment in a few different ways, namely the right to free speech, the right to peaceably assemble, and the right to redress grievances. All of these aren’t bad in and of themselves. After all, if I didn’t have a First Amendment right, I wouldn’t be able to provide you with at least semi-intelligent blog posts on a regular basis.
You can stop typing your letters to have the First Amendment repealed, thank you very much.
Anyway, protests are a good test of how strong our commitment to the First Amendment is. At their core, they’re designed to challenge our way of thinking and consider an alternative. At least, that was before it became fashionable to start taking over campus buildings in the name of whatever cause is hip at the time. During the 60s and early 70s, it was America’s involvement in Vietnam. During my college years, it was America’s involvement in Iraq during Operation Desert Shield/Operation Desert Storm. At the turn of the 21st Century, it was America’s involvement in Iraq and other Middle Eastern countries following 9/11. And in each one of these, there is an argument to be made about the protesters being on the right side of the issue. Granted, some arguments are dumber than others, but you get the idea.
The current crop of protesters, though…I’m just not feeling it. The best way I can describe it is college students are upset Israel is taking military action against people who killed a bunch of people and kidnapped others. Oh, and America and different colleges and universities across the country support Israel and/or take money from them. Obviously, this must be addressed! After all, we don’t want Israel to think they can actually defend themselves against people who want Jews exterminated, right?
This notion stems from the Left’s love of the underdogs, or at least politically expedient underdogs. You don’t see Leftists taking over campus buildings to protest the lack of white members of the Congressional Black Caucus, but you will see them expressing unwavering support for Palestinians, Ukrainians, and anyone else who is trying to fight the good fight against a bigger, more powerful enemy.
Oh, and just so happens to fit into a neat Leftist narrative. Palestinians are dying by the gajillions, guys! And those poor Ukrainians are having to fight a war with only toothpicks, some half-used bottles of Elmer’s Glue, and the occasional rubber band! It’s only moral to show their support for these brave fighters who only want a better life for themselves.
And, you know, kill enough of the enemy so they can take stuff.
So, to show their solidarity with the people actually doing the fighting, college students are…staying as far away from the front lines as possible and creating their own mini versions of the CHAZ/CHOP in Portland. But instead of being able to sustain themselves, these brave moral souls are making demands for everything from food to banana-free zones to building materials.
That’s right, kids. They’re holding private property hostage.
And to no one’s surprise, college and university administrators let it go until there’s enough pressure on them to do something. And do something they did! Some cancelled the rest of the semester. Some decided to go virtual for the rest of the semester. And a few grew some balls and brought in law enforcement to take down the encampments or suspended students involved in the protests.
It’s clear to me who the masterminds behind the current movement are: fucking idiots.
Seriously, it’s been bandied about that your fiend…I mean friend and mine, Uncle George Soros, is behind the current crop of campus uprisings. Of course, fact checkers have already tried to debunk it, so that tells me he’s definitely involved at some level. Maybe not directly, but his talon-like fingers are in there somehow because, well, he’s George Fucking Soros!
To be fair to the fact checkers, there are layers upon layers upon layers to the way Uncle George funds Leftist sinkholes…I mean projects. But in most cases, the money gets wasted because he’s relying on people who are fucking idiots to do his bidding.
Like…the student protesters! See! It all connects!
While the previously aforementioned protests tended to be more on the peaceful (and less destructive) side, the current group of protesters have been taught in the ways of BLM and Antifa, which sets up an interesting parallel with a couple of figures from the 60s protests, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X. At the start of the civil rights movement of the time, the two figures took diametrically opposite stances on how to advance the cause. King sought peaceful non-compliance, while Malcolm X sought more direct action, up to and including violence. Today’s protesters seem much more aligned with the Malcolm X approach of “by any means necessary” and are more than willing to shed blood to bring about change.
Not their blood, mind you. That would be insane! Now, someone else’s blood, that’s perfectly fine to fuck with.
The problem with this approach, however, comes in the form of criminal activities. At the very least, any protester who takes over a campus building and stays there beyond a reasonable request to vacate is guilty of trespassing. Not a serious crime, but a crime nonetheless. Then, there’s destruction of public property, graffiti, discrimination against pro-Israeli students through the use of wristbands, terroristic threats, and many other possible crimes that, if prosecuted, would land more than a few of the protesters in the Big House for a long time.
Therein lies the question: will they be prosecuted? Given how Leftists enjoy letting criminals run free, there’s a good chance most of them will get off with a slap on the wrist and a mark on their permanent record, which by now has been converted to a downloadable file on iTunes. And while a whiff of a criminal record might be enough to make potential employers run away from these idiots, there are some who are willing to hire them.
Yeah. Ask Bud Light and Planet Fitness how capitulating to the Left worked for them. Spoiler Alert: it tanked their companies so much Michael Dukakis was seen riding in them.
It’s the disregard for the law that separates the previous protests from the current crop. Sure, you had some criminal activity with some of the earlier protests I mentioned, but not nearly to the levels we’re currently seeing. And a lot less whining. It’s hard to be seen as a true revolutionary when you’re begging the educational entity you’re protesting for food so you can continue to protest the same educational entity.
Kinda makes you reconsider forgiving college debt, doesn’t it?
Regardless of where you stand on the war in Gaza, the fact remains the protesters are their own worst enemies, but they’re also doubling as President Brick Tamland’s worst enemies if MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough is any indication. More importantly, though, these protests show how far the Left has fallen as an engine for change. For all the positive press they’re getting from Leftists in the media, the needle isn’t moving in Palestine’s favor. If anything, they’re turning off more people than they’re gaining because they’re going about it the wrong way and looking like assholes in the process. Try getting people who are barely making ends meet to get on your side by blocking roadways with stupid marches which prevent them from going to or coming from work.
And even with the backdrop of academia, it’s hard for me to not laugh at the sheer absurdity of the protests themselves. I mean, will a Palestinian child be saved if Hippie McBonghit holes up in one of the administration buildings? Nope! Will there be a ceasefire if more students threaten Jewish students to the point they can’t even attend class without being accosted? No. Will the Palestinians be able to get a foothold in Gaza if the University of Southern Dumbfuckistan decides to divest itself from any Israeli sources of income? Oooh, sor-ray.
No matter what they do, the protesters are fighting a battle so delusional and futile Don Quixote is telling them to knock it off. But those of us outside the Leftist bubble have time on our side. The recent crop of protesters from Occupy Wall Street to the current dipshits aren’t ready for shit to go sideways. Once the current semester ends and there are fewer people to annoy, what will they do? They’re attention whores, and they will be deprived of the one thing they need more than anything: people paying attention to them. If these protests go further into summer (which I honestly doubt), they will have to deal with summer weather conditions, including heat, humidity, thunderstorms, tornadoes, and so on. Hell, a lot of the BLM protests broke up when the temperature dropped. And these marshmallow warriors don’t appear to be any different.
But I, for one, hope they prove me wrong. After all, it’s hard to find good comedy these days.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
To put it mildly, 2020 has become Dennis Hopper on a bad acid trip. Every time we think things can’t get any worse or weirder, somebody says, “Hold my beer.” And for once, it’s not me.
Black Lives Matter has inspired a group in Seattle to create a self-contained community formerly called the Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone (CHAZ) and now called the Capitol Hill Occupied Protest (CHOP). Nice to know these folks have an internal PR firm because CHAZ makes them sound like a creepy scumbag guy at the bar hitting on any woman with a pulse. Whatever they want to call themselves is fine, but it’s interesting to note what these CHAZholes actually do.
At least, I hope it’s interesting enough, otherwise I have nothing else to write about this week.
CHAZ/CHOP
What the Left thinks it means – a group of protesters banding together in peace and harmony to protest police brutality
What it really means – Occupy 2.0 with better acronyms
Remember the good old days when Occupy Wall Street took over public parks and turned them into communes full of drug use, rapes, and people repeating whatever some doofus with a megaphone would say? Those were the days, weren’t they? Now, that’s passe. The new hotness is taking over six square blocks of downtown properties (often without permission from the owners, I might add) and setting up Zuccotti Park West, complete with a warlord.
Well, he calls himself a warlord. He’s actually a rapper turned warlord.
And, well, CHAZ/CHOP isn’t really all that autonomous. In fact, they’re on social media frequently with requests for food and other items they need to survive. Oh, and they’ve only now started a garden, fertilized with human waste. And when you consider the upheaval in just one week ranging from multiple assaults and at least one theft to the suicide of a trans leader within CHAZ/CHOP, I think it’s safe to say the great CHAZ/CHOP experiment has stumbled more than a drunken sailor with a shortened peg leg.
But I’m probably just poisoning the well. I’m sure CHAZ/CHOP will be just fine, just like the Occupy folks were.
Actually, now that I think about it, Occupy Wall Street started petering out when the weather got cold. It’s one thing to rage against the machine when the weather’s nice, but it’s a lot harder to muster the resolve to fight the power when you’re also fighting frostbite. This hits on one of the major problems both Occupy Wall Street and CHAZ/CHOP face: a lack of personal discipline. Feeling passionate about a cause such as police brutality can only take you so far if you aren’t prepared to act on that passion no matter what the sacrifice. Given the fact neither group could do without their cell phones, I’m going to guess they aren’t all that down for the struggle.
The bigger question that comes up for me in both cases is what the actions taken had to do with the intended end result. Is camping out in Seattle going to make bad police officers suddenly stop being violent idiots with badges? Maybe I’m missing something, but I don’t see how we get from Point A to Point B. Even with the Mayor of Seattle and the Governor of Washington supporting CHAZ/CHOP and being receptive to their demands/expectations, there’s a pretty big gap that no one seems to be able to address.
Granted, this could fall under the penumbra of “raising awareness” that Leftists trot out whenever they do something stupid and non-productive for a cause du joir, but I’m gonna have to say we’re aware of some police officers getting overzealous while on duty. Awareness isn’t the problem here, kids. Some of us are just having trouble figuring out how your actions lead to better policing. The Underpants Gnomes from “South Park” had a better grasp on things than you guys do.
This may make for great comedy for those of us who understand the absurdity of calling a group that still asks for help “autonomous,” but I get the feeling there’s a tragedy brewing because CHAZ/CHOP plays to the worst of our human nature. We all strive for freedom, but not everyone takes into account what that freedom can do to others in our general vicinity. That’s where personal discipline comes into play. If you feel you are free to do whatever you want, there is a good likelihood you are going to infringe upon others because you are going to be more concerned about yourself than you are about anyone else. Combine that with the narcissism running rampant in our culture today and you have all the makings of anarchy. All it takes is a spark.
Guess what, CHAZ/CHOP folks! You’re sitting on a powder keg in the middle of a wildfire, and it’s not if it will explode, but when. Whether you get external pressure from the property owners whose properties you’ve overtaken or internal pressure when the inhabitants of CHAZ/CHOP get fed up with the lack of progress or the inevitable butting of heads, you’ve built the means of your own destruction.
Just like Occupy Wall Street did.
The biggest problem CHAZ/CHOP faces right now is a lack of a clear message and direction. Sure, the Mayor may say it seems like a street festival, but how many street festivals have a warlord? Even if he’s only self-titled, it’s a bad look made even worse by driving out a police precinct under threat of firebombing. Regardless of whether it’s the CHAZ/CHOP gang or a different group doing it, CHAZ/CHOP is going to get blamed for no other reason than proximity, and you kids haven’t done anything to counter that perception.
In the end, though, you may have a story to tell your grandchildren someday, but you will have accomplished nothing. With a track record like that, some of you may occupy a Congressional seat someday.