Tag: election 2024

Unlocking the Keys

With all of the post-2024 Election analyses, there’s been a lot of talk about Allan Lichtman’s 13 Keys, the factors he’s used to predict 9 of the past 11 Presidential elections. A lot of talk, but not a lot of analysis, per se. Oh, you had your share of squawking heads on both pointing out how the 13 Keys failed this election, but not a lot of thought as to why.

Well, since I lack hobbies, I decided to do a bit of research and analysis of my own and what I found out might change a few minds.

Before we get into the boring stuff, we have to set our parameters, i.e. know what we’re talking about. After all, this isn’t MSNBC, so we can’t get away with spouting off without having facts.

Lichtman’s Keys are as follows:

Party mandate: After the midterm elections, the incumbent party holds more seats in the US House of Representatives than after the previous midterm elections. 

Contest: There is no serious contest for the incumbent party nomination. 

Incumbency: The incumbent party candidate is the sitting president. 

Third party: There is no significant third party or independent campaign. 

Short term economy: The economy is not in recession during the election campaign. 

Long term economy: Real per capita economic growth during the term equals or exceeds mean growth during the previous two terms. 

Policy change: The incumbent administration effects major changes in national policy. 

Social unrest: There is no sustained social unrest during the term. 

Scandal: The incumbent administration is untainted by major scandal. 

Foreign/military failure: The incumbent administration suffers no major failure in foreign or military affairs. 

Foreign/military success: The incumbent administration achieves a major success in foreign or military affairs.

Incumbent charisma: The incumbent party candidate is charismatic or a national hero. 

Challenger charisma: The challenging party candidate is not charismatic or a national hero. 

Under Lichtman’s model, a successful candidate has to win at least 8 of these Keys. And considering its track record, it would be hard to imagine a scenario where the Keys failed.

This is where things get a little tricky, and where most of the post-election analysis surrounding the Keys stopped. The consensus was the Keys were wrong, which negatively impacts Lichtman and the model itself. However, that’s far too simplistic and inaccurate an assessment. Based on my own analysis, the Keys still work and worked in the 2024 election.

Where the failure occurred is in the interpretation of the data. Whenever you do any kind of social research, there is always a chance one’s personal beliefs can find their way into the analysis of the findings. If you’re not careful, you go from letting the data drive your conclusions to rooting for a particular conclusion and retroactively figuring out how it came to pass.

To be fair, observation bias isn’t limited to the “soft sciences.” There are some prime examples of hard sciences being sucked into the wonderful world of bias. The difference is in the ability to reconstruct the experiment to test the hypothesis further. With hard science, the way to do that is clear, but with soft science, it’s unclear, if not impossible, to reproduce the outcomes. We can set up similar conditions, but the passage of time, the introduction of new information, or even just the possibility of a changed opinion limit the effectiveness and accuracy of the reproduction.

Setting all that aside (because it gets pretty close to migraine-inducing territory for me), the important takeaway is the data is the data. It’s how we interpret it that creates the opening for bias to affect the outcome.

I can’t say for certain Lichtman’s prediction that Vice President Kamala Harris would win 9 of the 13 keys was based on bias rather than a difference in interpreting the data. Prior to 2024, the only other time in recent history that the Keys didn’t accurately predict the outcome was in 2000 when he predicted Al Gore would defeat George W. Bush. His explanation for why the Keys didn’t predict the winner then? Bush stole the election.

That suggests to me he may have a bias issue when it comes to elections he feels strongly about, and he has made it clear he’s not a Trump supporter by any means. Having said that, I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt here and chalk the 2024 election prediction failure to just having an off night. More grace than he deserves? Maybe, but feel free to excoriate me in the comments.

Lichtman’s prediction for 2024 were as follows:


The following nine keys line up in favor of the incumbent Democrats.

Contest Key 2: The Democrats have united in near unanimity behind Harris.

Third-Party Key 4: In recognition of his fading support, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. suspended his campaign. His endorsement of Donald Trump does not impact this key.

Short-Term Economy Key 5: It is too late for a recession to take hold of the economy before the election. The National Bureau of Economic Research, which provides the most reliable assessment of recessions, typically takes a few months to establish that the economy has fallen into a recession (National Bureau of Economic Research, 2020).

Long-Term Economy Key 6: Real per-capita growth during the Biden term far exceeds the average of the previous two presidential terms.

Policy Change Key 7: Biden has fundamentally changed the policies of the Trump administration in areas such as the environment and climate change, infrastructure, immigration, taxes, and women’s and civil rights.

Social Unrest Key 8: Despite sporadic demonstrations, social unrest has not risen to the level needed to forfeit this key: massive, unresolved unrest that threatens the stability of society as in the 1960s and early 1970s.

Scandal Key 9: Republicans in Congress have tried and failed to pin a scandal on President Biden. His son Hunter’s crimes do not count as scandal, which to do so must implicate the president himself and generate bipartisan recognition of wrongdoing.

Foreign/Military Success Key 11: President Biden and Biden alone forged the coalition of the West that kept Putin from conquering Ukraine and then undermining America’s national security by threatening its NATO allies. Biden’s initiatives will go down in history as an extraordinary presidential achievement.

Challenger Charisma Key 13: As explained, Trump does not fit the criteria of a once-in-a-generation, broadly appealing, transformational candidate like Franklin D. Roosevelt or Ronald Reagan.


Seems like a lock, right? Not quite.

I have no dog in this hunt since I didn’t vote for either Trump or Harris, so my analysis shook out a bit differently. Instead of focusing on just the 9 keys Lichtman thought Harris would win, I think a look at all 13 would be helpful.

Here’s what I came up with.

Party Mandate: Although the 2022 midterm elections didn’t quite swing as far right as the GOP would have wanted, the fact remains they regained control of the House of Representatives. On that, Lichtman and I concur. Advantage: Trump.

Contest: Lichtman gave this one to Harris, but the conditions under which she received the nomination makes this a bit harder for me to concede this Key to her. At the beginning of the election cycle, Ms. Harris was still considered to be Vice President, in spite of the thoughts at the time she might be a drag on the ticket. The unity behind her didn’t come together until after the nomination process was truncated and she was allowed to take over for Joe Biden. Trump, on the other hand, went through a primary process where he had challengers of varying degrees of ineptitude. Even with that being the case, the GOP by and large got behind Trump from the outset. Thus, I have to give this one to the GOP. Advantage: Trump.

Incumbancy: Once Joe Biden dropped out, this Key became a moot point. Neither Trump nor Harris could claim this, so neither one would get the advantage from it. No Advantage.

Third Party: There was no significant third party presence in the 2024 election. The closest we had was Robert Kennedy, Jr. No Advantage.

Short Term Economy: Now, we’re getting into the fun stuff! Lichtman was correct when he said there was not a recession in play here. However, that doesn’t automatically mean the economy is strong. We may not have had a recession, but we still had to deal with an economy voters felt was in decline because, well, it was. Even if you consider the drop in the inflation rate to be a step in the right direction, it didn’t resonate with voters. For that reason, I cannot give Harris the nod as Lichtman did. Advantage: Trump.

Long Term Economy: Second verse, same as the first. Advantage: Trump.

Policy Change: Again, Lichtman correctly stated the Biden Administration changed policies put in place by the Trump Administration, which were certainly big, but for the wrong reasons because they were historically bad changes. (Inflation Reduction Act, anyone?) When asked what she would do differently, Harris couldn’t come up with anything, which meant she knowingly or inadvertently signed off on the policy changes Biden made, which were ultimately unpopular. Staying the course when you’re about to hit the rocks isn’t smart in real life or in politics. Advantage: Trump.

Social Unrest: One of the candidates got shot at twice after years of being called a fascist, and the other was Kamala Harris. That tells me there’s social unrest. Advantage: Trump.

Scandal: Sorry, sir, but you think President Biden was devoid of scandal, I have swamp land in Death Valley I’d love to sell you. This was one of the biggest blunders Lichtman had with his 2024 Keys because it ignored one of the biggest stories of last year: Biden’s declining mental faculties. That in and of itself (as well as the media’s cover-up) was a big enough scandal to swing this Key to Trump. Advantage: Trump.

Foreign or Military Failure: That was Joe Biden’s M.O. even back in his Congressional days. As we saw with the mess that was the Afghanistan withdrawal, there was no way for Biden to escape blame for it. And Harris was pretty much either a ghost on the scene or nodded in approval at whatever harebrained idea Biden came up with at the time. Trump didn’t have that problem because, well, he wasn’t Commander In Chief. Advantage: Trump.

Foreign/Military Success: Unless you count making President Volodymyr Zelenskyy of Ukraine super rich, I got nothing. Advantage: Trump.

Incumbent Charisma/Hero: Even if you count Harris as the incumbent, she was a popularity void, as evidenced by the number of people who walked out of her rallies after the musical performances by big-name stars concluded. And Trump wasn’t the incumbent. It’s a wash. No Advantage.

Challenger Charisma/Hero: Say what you will about the man, Donald Trump has charisma and he imposed his will on the Harris campaign. Lichtman got this one completely wrong. Advantage: Trump.

So the final score from my analysis is 10 Keys for Trump, 0 for Harris, and 3 for No Advantage. And considering Trump won the White House, I’d say the Keys worked pretty good once possible bias (and definite missed calls) were accounted for. It may not have been the result Lichtman wanted, but from where I sit, the Keys worked to perfection, even if he didn’t.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

With Donald Trump’s second Inauguration right around the corner, the Left has been acting mature and being deeply introspective about how Queen Kamala the Appointed lost, looking for a better way forward for 2028.

Just kidding! They’re still screaming like little bitches.

But this time around, their shrieking sounds…vaguely familiar. In fact, it was 4 years ago, if memory serves. It’s almost as if the Left…is denying the results of the 2024 election. After all, it’s impossible Trump won the popular vote against someone as beloved as Queen Kamala the Appointed, right?

Well, let’s just say everything old is hypocritical again. Back to the election denial well for another taste.

election denial

What the Left thinks it means – a valid expression of doubt over the results of the 2024 election

What it really means – hypocritical bullshit the Left uses to excuse losing so badly

There’s a popular idea in Leftist circles that Republicans can only win by cheating. That’s going to come as news to those of us who remember the 1984 election, where Ronald Reagan made Walter Mondale his bitch, but that’s not important right now. The point is Leftists have built up a belief they will always win elections unless there’s chicanery.

You know, like the Electoral College?

This time around, the excuses for Queen Kamala the Appointed’s loss are more frequent than my trips to the bathroom after eating Chipotle’s e-coli special. Elon Musk hacked the voting machines. There is evidence of election tampering, which is why the Harris campaign started collecting funds for what they call the “President’s Recount Account.” Trump had Russians call in fake bomb threats to polling places. There are 20 million missing votes. And, because these are Leftists we’re dealing with here, a ton of hashtags.

To be fair, there has been election denial from both the Left and the Right in recent years, but of the two sides, the Left has had the election denial thing on lockdown. But after the 202o election where the President Brick Tamland got more votes than Barack fucking Obama (something I’m still questioning because it makes zero sense), the Left turned their popular electoral pastime into…fostering an insurrection! Yep, if you even sounded like you were questioning the outcome of the most secure election in history (according to the same Leftists saying the 2024 election was stolen), you were on par with those evil, dastardly, no-good, utterly despicable insurrectionists who…let me read my notes here…were mostly peaceful (as opposed to the “mostly peaceful” protests in 2020 where shit got broken and set on fire), with only a handful of asshats who did more than just peaceably assemble.

Well, if that’s the case, better get me a buffalo hat.

Of course, it’s not, but the Left made the rules, so that means I get to call each and every one of them who denies the 2024 election insurrectionists and, thus, subject to jail time and other legal overreactions. I hear Gitmo is nice this time of year…

Seriously, though, we should not be afraid to call bullshit if there’s actual bullshit being presented as truth. To date, I have yet to see any convincing evidence of any of the Left’s election denial, but I have seen some questions about the 2020 election that make it hard to believe it was as legit as the Left wants us to believe. Regardless, the act of denying an election isn’t the second coming of the burning of the Reichstag building. In today’s society where lying is like breathing (especially to the political and media classes), I’m surprised there aren’t more protests over stolen elections. I think the reasons there aren’t are a) the Right all have jobs, and b) the Left are pussies.

More to the point, there are some serious election irregularities that both sides can’t seem to agree are problems. Like the possibility there are some places where there are more votes cast than citizens in those places. Combine these with people who may be voting twice because they have homes in two different states (i.e. snowbirds and college students), ineligible voters, the dead voting in elections, long lines at polling places, electioneering under the guise of handing out free water at polling places, the lack of updated technology, the over-reliance on said technology, the lack of voting machines in some districts, and a general apathy towards voting because of shady shit going on, and we have a powder keg just waiting to be set alight by someone with a Zippo and a bad attitude.

Yet, even with all of this (and the hypocrisy of the Left), it’s hard to point out many examples of actual election denial. We may not like the results, but that in and of itself is not election denial. As long as we aren’t breaking the law, negatively impacting someone else’s rights, or generally being an asshole about it, it’s kosher. And, Leftists, hurt fee-fees don’t count as generally being an asshole, unless we’re talking about you being said asshole.

And I would be remiss if I didn’t point out the sheer hypocrisy of election denial. It’s okay for Leftists to question election results, but not for anybody else? Bullshit! Either you let everybody in on your reindeer games or you can take all the seats. From where I stand, you can definitely take the seats and go over there. No, not there. Still too close. Keep going. I’ll let you know when you can stop.

Okay, now we have our chance. Let’s get out of here!

Leftist Lexicion Word of the Week

Yep, we’re back talking about the 2024 Election again.

Since Donald Trump became the 47th President, the Left has been trying to figure out what went wrong. I have a thought: don’t run Hillary Clinton with a tan on a shitty platform focused on abortion rather than the cost of groceries. And as simple as that is to understand, the Left are still trying to figure out a way to right the DNC Titanic.

One idea that caught on was finding left-wing versions of Joe Rogan and Elon Musk. Spoiler Alert: you had them. They were called Joe Rogan and Elon Musk. But instead of taking a step back and realize running on bat-shit insane policies, they’re trying to find a way to reach out to white men.

Enter Dean Withers, affectionately called “the Bro Whisperer.”

Hoo boy. This one’s gonna sting, kids.

the Bro Whisperer

What the Left thinks it means – a way for the Left to reach out to young men to persuade them to vote Democrat

What it really means – proof positive the Left still doesn’t know what the fuck they’re doing

Leftists have had a pretty significant footprint (carbon or otherwise) in the mainstream media. Most major newspapers, the three networks, PBS, and some online spaces such as Facebook and YouTube. Even the Social Media Network Formerly Known As Twitter had the loving and diverse jackboot of the Left on its throat for a long time.

But as anyone who is even vaguely familiar with the rise of talk radio can tell you, that only meant the Right had to create their own niche in the market. So, they did. Whether it was Rush Limbaugh, Fox News, or Truth Social, the Right found a way to take the good parts of what the Left shit on, clean them off, and make them work.

Unfortunately for the Left, they’re not so successful in reversing the political polarity and being successful. And this whole “Bro Whisperer” thing is bound to tank more than Michael Dukakis in a tank.

First off, the concept is utterly demeaning to anyone with an IQ above Kate Moss’s waist size. Which is why the Left thinks it’s a great idea, by the way. As much as the Left loves to push back against negative gender stereotypes when it comes to women (and, more recently, men who claim to be women but have a five o’clock shadow that would make Bigfoot look like Dr. Evil), they’re resorting to the characterization of potential young male voters as early 90s-era frat boys. Instead of doing some introspection and working on an actual message, turn them all into “bros.”

Fucking brilliant.

Of course, this runs counter to the way the Left has seen men in recent decades. Potential rapists, gun nuts, control freaks, hyper-macho gym bros, colonists, misogynists, homophobes, intellectually and emotionally stunted, and the hits keep coming. And those are the names they use if they like you!

Seriously, though, the Left has been pounding the drums that men suck for a while now. Even now, the big brains on the Left blame men for Queen Kamala the Appointed’s election loss, but this time it’s men of all colors, not just whites, who get the blame. Apparently, men are afraid of strong women leaders, but the Left hasn’t presented any to us aside from Tulsi Gabbard. Most of the time, the Left’s idea of a strong woman is weaker than the drinks at a fourth-rate strip club.

Not that I know anything about that, mind you…

Let me help you Leftists with an important concept that will come in handy sooner or later: not everything you think can be boiled down to sexism is actually sexism. Unless you’re taking the same drugs Joy Reid is, Harris ran a horrible campaign and wasted a shit-ton of money in the process. She didn’t really make much of an appeal to men, instead focusing on abortion (which Leftists keep telling us “no vagina, no say” so men would be further excluded from the conversation). And aside from doing a horrible fucking job on tasks President Brick Tamland gave her, she could list the number of successes she’s had on the one hand of the world’s unluckiest woodworker. It’s the lack of outreach on her campaign’s part that cost her the male vote.

Say what you will about Trump, he at least appealed to potential voters from all walks of life. That’s what drew in voters and political and social figures like the aforementioned Rogan and Musk. He didn’t talk down to them. He didn’t throw them out of the movement if they dared to consider the Right might not be the second coming of Hitler. Now that Queen Kamala the Appointed got stomped like a vat of grapes in an “I Love Lucy” episode, some on the Left are now willing to listen.

Hence, the “Bro Whisperer” bullshit.

But remember what I said earlier about the Left not exactly being successful in adopting ideas of the Right? Yeah, this is another one of them. On the bright side, though, it gives us an opportunity to remember the good old days of Air America. Yeah, that was an enjoyable three days (fewer if you take out all the commercials).

Now, typically I try to avoid making superficial comments about a Leftist’s looks or personality. Unfortunately, I’m going to have to break that rule this time because the “Bro Whisper” is the least Bro-ish Bro to ever Bro a Bro, Bro. But the Left are looking to him to help bridge the gap between themselves and the segment of the population they’ve shit on for decades. All I gotta say is good luck, kid. Maybe you’ll be Bro Rogan, but I’m gonna go out on a limb and say you won’t.

This on-again-off-again political romance with male voters shows the duplicity of the Left’s approach, as well as the cynicism behind it. The thing to remember is the Left thinks we’re dumber than a bag of hammers unless we say, think, and do exactly what they do. They see us as goldfish with a blackout drinking problem: short of memory and not terribly clear on the details. Anyone who backs the “Bro Whisperer” concept is perpetuating that idea. They think going from blaming male voters for not giving us Queen Kamala the Appointed to asking for their votes (and money, of course) is no big deal because we won’t remember how they called us fascists.

Even though it was literally a week or two before Election Day. I’m sure Queen Kamala’s positions have changed since then and she wants to make up for slamming men more than Nancy Pelosi slams shots at an open bar. She’s matured in that nearly 2 month period.

And if you believe that, I have some swamp land in the Sahara Desert I’d love to sell ya.

The best part of the “Bro Whisperer” (at least to me) is how confident the Left is it’s going to work. The Left has a serious ego problem (but that’s a blog post for another day) and it’s their sheer arrogance in their shitty ideas that will make the inevitable flop all the more enjoyable. In today’s political environment, the Left is Wile E. Coyote and we’re Acme.

I’m sure the “Bro Whisperer” is going to give it the old community college/votech try and the Left will marvel at the tens and tens of listeners he’s going to get, but it’s too late for the Left to mend fences. You’re going to have to be real going forward to regain the male vote.

On the bright side, you still have the men pretending to be women vote on lockdown!

Noses Up, Thumbs Down

As a recovering Leftist, I could go on for days about everything I see wrong with the current Left, mainly because they tend to be the same problems I saw when I was among their ranks. They’re not even original enough to recycle their problems!

The one common aspect that flows through all of these issues is arrogance. Regardless of the circumstances, Leftists always think they’re the smartest people in the room and aren’t afraid to let you know it. And they’re obviously better than you because they’re Leftists.

If that logic were any more circular it would give me motion sickness.

And that’s on top of the nausea I get when listening to Leftists expound upon their brilliance with takes worse than letting Lindsey Lohan be your AA sponsor. Just look back at any of the Leftists livestreaming the 2024 election. Down to the one, they all had the same take: Queen Kamala the Appointed was not only going to win, but ran a flawless campaign. Only the worst possible people could possibly vote for Donald Trump!

Yeah, about that.

Not only did Leftists double down on the “everyone else is stupid” rhetoric (which always brings people to the polls…to vote against them), but they also did what they did with climate change “research”: start with the answer and work backwards, ignoring anything that contradicts the desired results. In doing so, the Left has become the personification of the Principal Skinner “No, it’s the children who are wrong” meme.

To this day (see local listings for Leftist insanity in your area) the Left will do anything they can to avoid the one thing they need to do to move forward: admit they were wrong. And to their credit, some Leftists are starting to do just that, whether it be out of a crisis of conscience or a crisis of potential irrelevancy. Most of them, however, are confident it’s everyone else who is to blame for their own fuck-ups.

That’s the thing about egotists. They can never fail; they can only be failed. When they make a mistake, it’s always someone else’s or something else’s fault. And guess who is using this very tactic to explain away the 2024 election debacle and prepare for the 2028 election debacle?

You got it. The same people who gave us Queen Kamala the Appointed.

And it’s not just in politics where the Left claim to be smarter than everyone else. The Leftist smug reaches in to academia, especially science. Climate change predictions that never come true, COVID-19 guidelines based on utter bullshit, people who make Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson the de facto experts on all things science (even when the science is not in their respective backgrounds), the adoption of 72 genders (Spoiler Alert: still just 2), the acceptance that trans women are no different than biological women, and many more anti-science takes from the self-professed “Party of Science.” And if you dare speak out and present data that proves them wrong, you’re a heretic and must be dismissed, censored, maligned, called a conspiracy nut, and so on.

And if these Leftist science fans are proven wrong, that information gets memory-holed faster than Eric Roberts accepts a role. An example of this is evolution. Growing up, all the Leftists (myself included) said man evolved from apes. It was repeated so much that it became the common truth, in spite of the fact there wasn’t much science to back it up. Years later, I was in an AOL chat room (ah, those were the days) and mentioned this. A Leftist then told me no scientist actually believed that and that I was making it up. No matter what sources I used or firsthand direct experience I had to the contrary, it was never enough to satisfy the Leftist. Their orthodoxy had changed, or should I say…evolved.

I’ll see myself out.

But before I go, there is one more thing I have to point out. A lot of the Leftist bravado comes with little-to-no justification. They think they’re smart because they all believe the same things, but if what they believe is utterly stupid, it’s not a sign of brilliance. When you press them on any significant issue, most of the time they wind up looking like an idiot. Or worse yet, Cenk Uygur.

And yet they think this attitude is a real winner. Keep thinking that, kids. Just try to act surprised when this shit blows up in your face. Again.

Extremist Makeover: MSNBC Edition

If the 2024 elections taught me anything, it’s how much the mainstream media’s influence is waning. And by waning, I mean tanking more than Michael Dukakis in a helmet. And if you got that reference, you are officially old. Welcome to the club!

But there’s one cable news network that has been hit the hardest: MSNBC, or as I call it “the Bluesky of cable news.” (And, for you MSNBC viewers out there, that’s not a positive thing.) Ratings are down, NBC is considering splitting MSNBC from its holdings (it’s not them, it’s you), and even high profile stars like Rachel Maddow are having to take pay cuts.

If anyone needed an Extremist Makeover, it’s MSNBC. Good thing I’m here to help!

Right now, MSNBC is directionless. They can go back to being the “Orange Man Bad” channel (as if they ever stopped), but that route has diminishing returns in its future. They’ve lost a lot of credibility following every Trump-related conspiracy theory and inviting on figures like Adam Schiff to perpetuate those conspiracy theories. They’re behind the times when it comes to reverting back to more straight news, as CNN has already tried to take a step back towards the middle from the hinterlands of Leftistinistan.

Not exactly an enviable position to say the least!

There are two choices that come to mind, neither one attractive in the grand scheme, but necessary to try to sustain an audience. The first is to try to appeal to the middle ground. You can still have Rachel Maddow, but you would also need someone on the other side (preferably not from the not-quite-as-insane-as-Joy-Reid-but-you-can-see-her-sanitarium-from-here group) to balance the scales and offer a different perspective.

And speaking of Joy Reid, you’re gonna have to let her go, as well as a few others. Al Sharpton, Lawrence O’Donnell, Chris Hayes, and hosts of others shouldn’t even be allowed in the newsroom if they were getting coffee for the real journalists. They should rightly be shown the door if for no other reason than to eliminate redundancies. Heck, Chris Hayes and Rachel Maddow are practically twins as it is, so why not get rid of the less talented one?

A change in ownership may also be in MSNBC’s future, which could go a long ways towards righting this left-leaning ship. One of the names being bandied about is Elon Musk, who knows a thing or two about bringing balance to a media outlet, as all the Leftists fleeing the Social Media Site Formerly Known As Twitter can attest. Or would if you didn’t get banned off Bluesky for not being Leftist enough.

On the other hand, it may be too late for MSNBC to gain any amount of credibility in the eyes of the media consuming public. In that case, maybe it’s time to lean into the nitwit Leftist conspiracy theories. Go all out! Rename yourself MSNBlueAnonC and let anyone with an idea that makes Trump look like the Dictator-du-jour. Is there fluoride in your drinking water? Trump did it! Step in some dog waste on your way into a San Francisco Whole Foods? Trump literally just took a dump right there! Make the Weekly World News look like the New York Times!

Wait, wait. I have to apologize for that last line. In no way, shape, or form was I attempting to question the journalistic integrity and prowess of a highly respected newspaper by comparing it to the New York Times. I’m sorry. Now please don’t sic Bat Boy on me!

Anyway, if you’re going to cater to the marginally coherent crowd, make sure it’s the best catering you can do. Sure, this will further tank your credibility and will shrink your audience smaller than the number of people who still want to see the Snow White movie when/if it comes out, but it will be fun. And when you really think about it, if you know you’re on the Titanic and about to plunge to an icy demise, why not have a little fun with it? Do the biggest cannonball you can and never regret it for a second!

Either way, I hope you folks at MSNBC take my advice. Especially on that second option because, although I can’t guarantee its success, I can guarantee it will make me laugh a lot.

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

Hollywood loves reboots like they love hookers and blow, and they really love hookers and blow. Sometimes these reboots work out (like the updated version of the Planet of the Apes movies, minus the Tim Buron-directed abomination). Sometimes they don’t (like the flaming shit-show that is the unreleased “Snow White”).

When Elon Musk bought Twitter and turned it into the Social Media Platform Formerly Known as Twitter, Leftists started looking for alternatives because they would no longer be able to count on high-ranking Leftists to censor those icky conservatives opinions that didn’t violate the Terms of Service, but did violate their fee-fees.

Now, they’ve found one, a little thing the kids like to call Bluesky. It’s relatively new, but it’s already boasting over 20 million users with a lot of them being former X users (so ex-X users. Thank you! Tip your waitstaff!) departing the social media site after Donald Trump won the Presidency for a second time with help from Elon Musk.

So, shall we take a trip into the Blue-niverse? (Thank you! Please hold your applause!) Even if you don’t want to, we’re going!

Bluesky

What the Left thinks it means – a social media site where like-minded people can share their opinions without fear of being censored by right wingers

What it really means – the digital version of Air America

After decades of having control over most of the popular media of the time, Leftists have had to adapt to a new environment where their control was no longer as secure as it once was. Talk radio, lead by the late Rush Limbaugh, started becoming the alternative to the squawking heads people once looked to for news. And, yes, there are plenty of examples of talk radio hosts getting shit wrong, but it didn’t matter. The Left no longer controlled the flow of information.

As a result, Leftists tried to ride the wave of talk radio success by creating Air America. Basically, what the brain trust behind it thought was all they had to do was replace Rush Limbaugh with Al Franken and watch the money roll in. Only, it didn’t. Talk radio wasn’t plug-and-play. You actually had to have personalities people want to listen to, and Air America really didn’t. Oh, they had an audience, but it was far smaller than the normal talk radio audience. Say what you will about Limbaugh, he knew how to entertain (which is ironic because Al Franken was on “Saturday Night Live” when it was actually funny).

And then Air America came in with a whimper and went out with a popcorn fart. You’re lucky to find anyone around my age to even remember Air America was something other than a Mel Gibson movie these days, and the only reason I remember it is because I’m just that lame. Nevertheless, the point is Leftists really don’t know how to catch up when someone outside of their ideological bubble races ahead of them.

Which brings us to Bluesky.

What Musk has done for X is so logical, it’s no surprise Leftists hate it. Instead of letting one side of the political aisle run roughshod over anyone who disagreed with their enlightened (and utterly dumb) opinions, Musk brought at least some semblance of neutrality to the platform. Which pissed off Leftists to no end. After all, if there’s one thing Leftists hate more than Donald Trump and Elon Musk, it’s having their positions challenged in any way. So, after spending all this time talking smack about the platform (while still on said platform), they took their balls and went home…to Bluesky.

Now, I’m not going to say it’s a flaming Port-A-Potty over there because, well, that would be unfair to flaming Port-A-Potties. Oh, sure, you’ll still find decent posts about nature and science, but most of the stuff being posted on there is straight-up Beyond Thunderdome shit. Aside from being accused of censoring conservative viewpoints as well as pro-Palestinian posts, they’re driving other Leftists away for…dare I say it…not being Leftist enough.

Great way to build up the world’s most tolerant echo chamber!

In the post-election environment we find ourselves in, this isn’t all that unusual. Leftists always look for people to blame for their election failures because it’s a hell of a lot easier than saying, “Ya know, we really fucked up here.” With Bluesky, the only difference is the venue.

Oh, and the level of batshit insanity.

Fortunately, you don’t have to go on Bluesky to see it. Some brave soul is going into Bluesky and picking out the best of the worst and putting it on X. Whomever you are, my few remaining brain cells and I thank you.

If you don’t want to get an X account (like your humble correspondent), there is still humor to be found out of the batshit insanity when you consider the possibility the Bluesky Leftists are screaming into the void (albeit an intellectual one) of their own creation. Then, it becomes a contest to try to “prove” how Leftist you are, which will lead to more fighting with the freak show.

Cue Thunderdome! Two Leftists enter, one Leftist leaves!

And we’ll have to deal with a potential shortage of popcorn…






An Open Letter to the Left

Hey, kids. It’s your internet buddy, Thomas. Listen, we need to talk about what just happened a couple of weeks ago. You know when your side lost to Donald Trump, again?

Now, this isn’t going to be one of those pieces where I mock your misfortune. There’s plenty of time to do that, and trust me I will. Instead, this piece has more of a serious tone, but will occasionally move into humorous terrain because I’m a firm believer politics is too serious a topic not to make fun of it.

So, with that being said, let me start with a question: what in the red, white, and blue fuck is wrong with you? Seriously, I’ve seen Chicago Bears fans this year take losses better than you have.

But that’s not the issue I have with you right now. I expect you to be sore losers because you’re sore winners. Where I’m coming from is what you refuse to learn from this ass-whupping and how it’s going to fuck you sideways in future elections unless you figure this shit out.

Let’s start with the Democatic scapegoat…I mean candidate, Kamala Harris. She had three and a half years to show she could fill in for Joe Biden and she failed. Now, you could (and definitely have) tried to chalk this up to racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia, agoraphobia (probably), and a metric shit-ton of other buzzwords, but there is a simpler reason.

She positively sucked as a candidate.

A lot of that falls at her feet. She didn’t have a clear, consistent message that resonated with anyone with higher than a third grade education for starters. I mean, “joy” as one of the many campaign trial (and mostly error) balloons? That’s about as fucking stupid as a candidate whose entire campaign could be boiled down to “hope” and “change.” But, I’m sure no one would ever be dumb enough to run such a candidate…okay, never mind.

The point is nothing she did seemed to be relatable because it truly felt she was only reciting squawking points without even a micron of sincerity. Except when it came to calling Donald Trump and his followers fascists because that always works, right?

Ooooooh. That didn’t work this time, did it? See, what works for your party faithful may not work for anyone else. And it leads to another aspect of her failed campaign: nobody who worked on it knows a fucking thing about what the electorate wants or needs. When Ms. Harris wasn’t dodging live interviews with people who might ask her a question more difficult than “What color is the red fire truck?” she was talking down to us, as were her surrogates and media types (who were pretty much one in the same). And last time I checked, joy didn’t pay the fucking bills.

And given how much she spent on celebrities, I really don’t think I’d trust her to run a tab at an all-you-can-drink water bar, let alone propose new spending to drive up the national debt even higher. I mean, she raised over a billion dollars and still came up a couple mil in the hole? But I’m sure it was money well wasted.

And while we’re here, whose idea was it to drag out celebrities who don’t have to take out a second mortgage to get a dozen eggs to tell us all how Kamala Harris is going to make our lives better? If you find out, make sure he or she is never allowed to do anything more complicated than getting coffee for the campaign staff, and even then double check to make sure the orders didn’t get fucked up. A pretty tall order, if not a grande or vente.

Meanwhile back at the clusterfuck that is the Left, there is a point you need to seriously consider, but you probably won’t because it would lead to enlightenment and self-reflection, that being you made the Trump victory possible. Who hid Joe Biden’s cognitive decline and gaslighted anyone who pointed out he wasn’t playing well with reality? That was you. Who decided to push away a Kennedy from the party? You again! Who tried to push Biden out of the race well after he had secured the nomination? Also you. Who decided to make one of the least popular Vice Presidents in modern history into the Second Coming of Barack Obama? Still you.

See a pattern forming here, kids?

And that’s only on your side of the aisle. You also made Donald Trump into a sympathetic figure. Convicted of 34 felonies, survivor of at least 2 known assassination attempts, the target of Leftists within the halls of power at the local, state, and federal levels, the center of a number of prove lies, and being accused of being weird, fascist, and the end of democracy as we know it. This should have been a slam dunk for Harris, but you assholes snatched defeat from the jaws of victory, and removed the lack of a popular vote victory that you saddled him with in 2016.

If your goal was to make Michael Dukakis in a tank look like George W. Bush on an aircraft carrier, mission accomplished. If your goal was to make Kamala Harris a viable Presidential candidate, boy did you fuck that up!

While you’re busy coming up with excuses to remove your fingerprints off Trump 47, there should be a moment of self-reflection when you realize no amount of Lady MacBeth-esque scrubbing will get your grubby fingerprints off the Election 2024 clusterfuck.

But when you’re ready to make progress instead of making stupid blue wristbands so you can recognize each other as you cosplay as The Handmaid’s Tale, it’s time you face some really hard truths.

1. Pissing off potential voters isn’t ever a winning strategy.

2. Acting like you’re smarter than you actually are will only make you look like assholes.

3. You are way too intellectually and ideologically insulated to know what your policies are doing to people outside of your circles.

4. You have no real bench for the 2028 Presidential election because you’re too focused on identity politics.

5. With the LGBTQIALEUCOMEONYOUCANNOTADDMOREFUCKINGLETTERSANDSYMBOLSTOTHISMOMENT+ community, you are trying to appeal to a fraction of a fraction of the population, which guarantees you will continue to be trounced in the polls.

But if recent polling is accurate, you idiots want Kamala Harris to run again in 2028.

You know, maybe getting pimp-slapped by the Right repeatedly is the best possible outcome for you. Maybe then you’ll figure this shit out and stop pissing off people you need to vote for you.





Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

With the reelection of Donald Trump, Leftists took the realization Queen Kamala the Appointed wasn’t going to be President as well as you’d expect: by being bat-shit insane. I mean, even worse than they normally are, which is saying a lot from an ideological group that thinks trans women can get pregnant.

Well, some of those trans men may have to pick up the slack, thanks to a movement Leftists women adopted in the wake of Trump’s victory. It’s called the 4B movement, and it’s…well, we’ll get into that after the break.

4B movement

What the Left thinks it means – women protesting the patriarchy by cutting off any relationship or sexual ties with men

What it really means – Leftist women co-opting a movement because Orange Man Bad

The origins of 4B has its roots in a South Korean feminist movement in the mid-to-late-2010s. The tenets of 4B are as follows:

no sex with men
no giving birth
no dating men
no marriage with men

In other words, my dating history prior to meeting my wife.

The driving force behind 4B is a desire to reject the “normal” family dynamic and the male-dominated culture that perpetuates it. Given the culture in South Korea and the challenges women face as a result of it, there is a legitimate need for such a movement, even if I may not align with them politically. I firmly believe there are things women can do as well as a man, if not better, and that women should be given the chance to succeed or fail on their merits.

So, naturally, Leftist women in America have to go and fuck it up.

Before they could get warmed up for their epic meltdowns, Leftist women were looking into 4B thanks to social media. Yes, the same outlets where people do stupid dances or post images of food are responsible for this movement coming to our shores. To which I say fuck you very much.

Or not.

And the thought behind this is just as shallow as the “influencers” on the aforementioned social media sites. Because Donald Trump appointed Supreme Court Justices who…horror of horrors…told the country abortion was a state issue, the misogyny of men not wanting to vote for Queen Kamala the Appointed because she ran a campaign so bad it made Walter Mondale circa 1984 look like Ronald Reagan circa 1984, and Orange Man Bad, of course, Leftist women are going to…adopt conservative values.

Holy self-own, Batman!

But it gets even better when you consider the Left’s fascination with abortion. Not only was it one of Queen Kamala the Appointed’s campaign cornerstones, but it’s a wedge issue that has worked time and time again in getting votes from a wide swath of the female population. Didn’t work this time, but that’s a blog post for another day.

Anyway, imagine the impact of Leftist women not having sex. Aside from making Tinder a lot easier for horny men to find a hook-up, it has the potential to reduce the number of abortions done. And what was one of the reason Leftist women want to adopt 4B?

Abortion rights.

Looks like Planned Parenthood is going to need even more federal funds to keep the doors open. Good luck with that with the incoming Administration and Congress, ladies.

To make matters worse (and by worse I mean a lot funnier), Leftist women are doing everything they can to repel men. Many are shaving their heads, getting tattoos or blue bracelets to show they voted for Queen Kamala the Appointed (and, thus, “safe”), or even suggesting men should be poisoned. Because that’s completely rational and totally not ultra-turbo-psycho-bitch behavior.

There are a lot of jokes I could make about Leftist women taking this tack, like how a significant chunk of the women backing 4B in America won’t have to worry about ever needing to get an abortion because they are less likely to have sex than an Amish eunuch, but that’s not what I do. That kind of superficiality only matches the superficiality of the women deciding to adopt 4B and, to be frank (or if you prefer, Steve), they really don’t deserve it.

Now, pointing and laughing, on the other hand…

Seriously, kids, it’s hard for me to take the Americanized version of 4B seriously because it makes no sense on any level and it reduces women to their lady parts…which is what a lot of immature men already do. Leftists believe women’s vaginas create a sisterhood that requires all women to think, speak, and most importantly vote a certain way. Otherwise you’re betraying your gender.

Unless, of course, there are women to the right of Gloria Steinem. Then, fuck those women!

But there is no such sisterhood, and there never has been. Men don’t think, act, and vote a certain way because we all have dicks. We do that because we’re men. We are pretty simple creatures when you get right down to it. It’s hard-wired into our DNA from Ug on down.

Women, by contrast, are much more complex, and I for one am glad for that. The females of the species are more in tune with their emotions (which explains a lot about the Leftist women signing on for 4 years of 4B when you think about it) because it’s hard-wired into their DNA. A woman is a marvel of creation, able to be a fierce lover and a fierce fighter depending on the situation, being the one responsible for carrying life within her body, and having the intelligence to guide her male counterpart towards a better way.

But Leftist women believe in the Sisterhood of the Traveling Vajayjay.

Call me crazy (and I’m sure you will if you haven’t already), but that comes off as incredibly condescending and, dare I say it (Spoiler Alert: I do dare), rather misogynistic. By viewing everything through the pussy prism, Leftists strip away everything that makes women special and turns them into objects without agency. As bad as you Leftists think Donald Trump is, you aren’t much better.

It will be interesting to see how long Leftist women will keep up with the tenets of 4B. It might last as long as a TikTok dance fad or go on and on like “The View.” In either case, I think I can speak for a good chunk of the American male population with this simple sentence.

Your terms are acceptable.

Forget It, He’s Rolling…

Now that Election 2024 is pretty much over (I’m looking at you, Arizona), people who get paid a lot of money to be wrong about political subjects are going to offer up their opinions of why Donald Trump won and/or why Queen Kamala the Appointed lost. (The short answer: Kamala took the wrong pages from the Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton books on running a political campaign.) And these overpaid idiots will come up with all sorts of excuses about white women this and black men that, and they will be completely wrong and yet still keep getting paid to recite the same bullshit.

So, instead of listening to overpaid idiots, listen to this unpaid idiot!

As with any political campaign or storyline, there is a familiar story that runs through it. Some are as old as Bernie Sanders, while others are fresh and new like the ink on the mortgage of his fifth vacation home. Ain’t democratic socialism great, kids?

This year’s election started out a little on the familiar side with Donald Trump winning the Republican nomination. The only question was whether President Brick Tamland would run against him. And by run, I mean stumble off in one direction and then another while looking more confused than the Socialist Socialite ordering Starbucks with only three possible options.

After President Tamland dropped out, Queen Kamala the Appointed took over and began stinking up the campaign trail with her tone-deaf rhetoric. The more she talked, the more she came off like a moralizing rich kid. Her surrogates on the campaign and in the media (which is pretty much the same thing) echoed the smug, “look at us, we’re so decent” attitude their candidate recited (when she wasn’t reminding us she grew up in a middle class household).

And what were they saying about the Trump campaign and its supporters? They were the worst of the worst! Crude, immoral, disgusting people whose opinions shouldn’t matter to good people like those on the other side trying to preserve democracy from them! They even tried to get Trump in trouble through any means necessary, including a radical use of the rules to try to get him out of the campaign! Even through these means, they just couldn’t get rid of Trump! He and his merry band of miscreants got their revenge and ultimately defeated the forces of Queen Kamala the Appointed!

That’s when it hit me. I’ve seen this story before. It took me a while to figure it out, but after a little thought, I remembered! And the more I thought about it, the more it fit this election cycle.

Election 2024 was “Animal House.”

Think about it! Trump was Bluto. JD Vance was Otter (and he’s damn glad to meet you). President Tamland was Dean Wormer. Tim Walz was Doug Neidermeyer. Queen Kamala the Appointed was a race and gender-swapped Greg Marmalard. Assistant Health Secretary Rachel Levine was Flounder. If you really wanted to draw out this premise more, I’m sure you could find parallels with the mainstream media pundits all acting as Kevin Bacon’s character crying “All is well!”

Even if it doesn’t work all the way, it’s in your heads now. You’re welcome. And at the very worst, you got your money’s worth out of this Election 2024 analysis!

Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week

I’ve followed Presidential politics for most of my life, so very little surprises me. But there are times when a new concept will make me take notice, sometimes because it’s so novel, other times because it’s so fucking stupid.

The 2024 election introduced such a concept. While watching a TikTok video of a Queen Kamala the Appointed supporter, I heard her repeating the phrase “red mirage, blue shift.” Naturally, I thought she was insane, but it intrigued me enough to look into it a bit further.

Turns out she might have been insane after all.

red mirage/blue shift

What the Left thinks it means – a phenomenon when a Republican candidate leads in the early polls only to lose support as the votes are counted

What it really means – a stupid ploy designed so Leftists get their hopes up

The concept of the red mirage and blue shift came into being in the 2020 election where Donald Trump lead in key battleground states, only to lose to President Brick Tamland as more votes were fabricated…I mean counted. I forgot, election denial is bad…or is it these days now Queen Kamala the Appointed got spanked? I guess we’ll find out soon.

Either way, the fact there are adults who placed so much faith in Donald Trump being so unpopular that he could never win the Presidency ever again that they invented a term to describe it is mind-blowing. And then to bring it back in 2024? I know Leftists believe in recycling, but shitty ideas should be left alone, not turned into a self-delusional mantra.

The core of the red mirage/blue shift idea is based on election uncertainty. With many elections, no one has a handle on who is ahead or behind, so there is a lot of guesswork by people paid way too much to be inaccurate. Yet, they are. There’s an entire cottage industry in political circles for people who make meteorologists look like Nostradamus, and they are paid well to come up with shit politicians, pundits, and media squawking heads take as gospel. What’s next, checking biorhythms, horoscopes, and tea leaves to see how Jethro G. Pigfucker is going to vote in the upcoming election for county dog catcher?

Given some of the politicians, pundits, and media squawking heads out there, I might have just figured out how they make their predictions.

Anyway, the point is there is too much emphasis being placed on a common phenomenon in politics. Nobody knows who is going to win for sure until all the votes are counted, and anyone who tells you differently is trying to sell you something, namely their prognostication abilities.

And while we’re here, the assholes who came up with the concept in 2020 sold Leftists a bill of goods not borne out by a little thing the kids like to call repetition. To put it mildly, the 2020 election was a clusterfuck of clusterfuckian proportions. It would have taken a lot to recreate the conditions that helped President Brick Tamland win the White House to help Queen Kamala the Appointed limp across the finish line.

And by a lot, I mean a lot of cheating…I mean vote counting.

Even though I think Donald Trump lost the 2020 Presidential election, I still think there was enough fuckery to question the results. I would have gone about it differently than the Trump Team did, mind you, but it’s not as outrageous as the Left would make it out to be. After all, they did it, too.

Regardless, there was a major problem the Left didn’t anticipate this year: Queen Kamala the Appointed is no President Brick Tamland. Say what you will about the man, he is charismatic. Dumb as a bag of hammers, but charismatic. Queen Kamala got the first half down, but didn’t bother to pick up the second half. Kinda hard to get a blue shift going when your candidate is less popular than an IRS agent with the Clap.

But the Left bought into Kamalamania…after saying she was dragging President Tamland down. And in doing so, they were heavily invested in the possibility a blue shift would come immediately following the red mirage. And as you might have guessed if you’ve been watching Leftists on social media, that didn’t happen. The possibility of Donald Trump getting and keeping a lead didn’t even cross their minds.

That’s the danger of believing so heavily in the red mirage/blue shift idea. It deludes people into thinking the tides of political fortune are so mercurial. Even in close elections, there is rarely a point where there is a fundamental shift that flips the results like we saw in 2020. It’s the political equivalent of a unicorn, only the unicorn doesn’t have the nuclear codes…that we know of…

Hey, at least with the unicorn, we wouldn’t have to worry about someone accidentally starting World War III while thinking he or she was ordering a sandwich.

The point is the red mirage/blue shift isn’t a real thing, nor should it be considered one. It’s a fantasy dreamed up by people who want Leftists to win so badly that they’re willing to lie about its frequency to get voters’ hopes up that the Republican candidate can’t win. To those people and the Leftists who believe them, I have three words.

President Trump, bitches.