And now the moment you’ve all been waiting for! No, not my announcement I’m giving up blogging. This is an even better announcement!
This week’s Lexicon has next to nothing to do with trans people! And in fact the only reference will be in the lead-up to this week’s topic!
In the aftermath of a Nashville school shooting that left 6 people dead and a trans person accused of pulling the trigger (see, I told you!), the Left went into full “push for gun control even though criminals don’t obey laws” mode. As pro-gun control groups swarmed the Capitol, three Democrat politicians joined in the festivities, using a bullhorn and approaching the front of the Tennessee House chamber to chant. Which got 2 of them expelled.
And also made these three politicians, Justin Jones, Justin Pearson, and Gloria Johnson, into a Leftist superhero team they’ve deemed the Tennessee Three. Which makes them perfect for mocking!
the Tennessee Three
What the Left thinks it means – three strong and brave people who are standing up to the NRA
What it really means – three politicians milking dumb policies for short term success and long term irrelevance
The Left love to circulate a meme that mocks the Right’s responses to mass shootings in America with the idea being the cycle is never-ending because no one does anything meaningful to stop it. If only we had stronger gun laws, like red flag laws and assault weapon bans, we could break the cycle and protect our communities!
Because tough gun control laws totally work so well in Chicago, Washington, and other Leftist udopeias…I mean utopias.
The gun control movement’s approach never changes, which makes it frightfully easy to lather, rinse, and repeat with every mass shooting (which is another weird term that has no clear definition, like pornography or Shia Labouf’s acting chops). Although gun control gets a little more traction because of this, most of the time their efforts fall flat. The Left attributes this to the power of the eeeeevilllll gun lobby, but I have a different hypothesis as to why gun control keeps failing to catch fire, if you’ll pardon the pun.
Gun control works less often than Kamala Harris.
Of course, Leftists point to states with the strictest gun laws having lower rates for gun-related deaths. (Their sources? Pro gun control groups like Everytown for Gun Safety and the Giffords Law Center.) And if you look at the states as a whole, you’d tend to agree.
Then, you wouldn’t know the dirty little secret behind the state approach: it hides how deadly many Democrat-run cities are. By broadening the focus to the state level, it obscures what really drives those numbers, which makes it easier for the Left to lie about them and blame Republicans for their allies’ ineptitude.
Now, what does this have to do with gun control? For one, it shows how dishonest the Left has to be when it comes to gun violence to try to make a point. The Left runs on the need to curtail gun violence, but they can’t even fix the shit they break. So, instead of, you know, fixing things, they blame Republicans for their lack of action to solve the problems they create.
And these assholes mock Republicans for times when the Right doesn’t accept personal responsibility?
Which brings us back to the stars of this melodrama, the Tennessee Three. While the Left elevates these three, it’s important to note they broke Tennessee House rules. That, and the fact those mean ol Republicans believe actions have consequences, lead to the current false narrative these three were victims.
No word yet from the 6 actual victims of the shooting on how they feel about the Tennessee Three.
The Left consider the Tennessee GOP’s “fuck around and find out” response to the Tennessee Three to be politically and racially motivated, considering two of the three happen to be black. As far as the political part, I have two words: fucking duh! Of course it’s political! Gun control and protests are political in nature, so any reactions that come from them are also going to be political.
Of course, the Left frames it as bad because three of their foot soldiers got caught. Much like the reason they tried to avoid bringing up the gender identity of the shooter (sorry, I lied earlier), the Left has to hide those little details that add context to advance the ideas they want. The gun control argument is all about deceit. Oh, and utter dumbfuckery. But if we didn’t have deceit and dumbfuckery here, I wouldn’t have a weekly column topic, so there’s that.
Meanwhile we still have a gun control problem, not a gun problem. Given the sheer number of guns Americans have, if guns were really the problem the Left say they were, they would be a bigger factor in the number of deaths per year. As it turns out, they’re not. In 2020, there were 45,222 people killed in gun-related incidents, with most of them being suicides. In that same year, this number didn’t even crack the top 10 of leading causes of death Granted this was a COVID year, so they might have squeaked in at number 10 otherwise, but the point is still the same. Guns aren’t the problem.
Even if you think strengthening gun laws is the answer, consider the fact there are already tens of thousands of gun laws already on the books at every level. Throw in the “Gun Free Zones” and you might as well open up a shooting gallery…oh wait, that’s Chicago on an average weekend!
And here’s a fun item to consider. When you look at the recent mass shootings, the majority of them were committed by…people who beat the current system. You know, the one you assclowns set up in the first place. What’s your next move? Create more hoops that mass shooters will zip through like they’re in Cirque du Soleil?
Which brings us to another problem with the gun control movement: the sheer number of laws makes it impossible to enforce them. More laws means more laws that won’t get enforced and zero gets accomplished. Well, except for more people dying, that is.
Maybe it’s me (and I wouldn’t be surprised if it is), but it seems the Tennessee Three are part of the problem. They make loud statements, get on TV thanks to Leftists, get glowing (albeit demonstratively bullshit) newspaper articles written about them, and rake in the adoration. In other words, the political circle jerk that always happens after a mass shooting (that don’t occur within Democrat-run cities, that is).
And with the accusations of racism, since the two black members were expelled while the white woman wasn’t (by 1 vote, by the way), the Tennessee Three have hit a Leftist goldmine. All by being assholes on the job. If that’s all it took, I would be a CEO!
And all on the bodies of 6 people sacrificed at the altar of gun control failure.
Of course, no one on the Left is going to say it because they have a vested interest in keeping gun violence front and center (as long as it can be blamed on Republicans). They have to keep the wheels greased, right? And then they can come out and show how much they CARE, dammit!
But if they really cared, the Tennessee Three would reject gun control as being a failure. Then again, that would require a level of self-awareness not even the smartest Leftist could muster.
By the way, Cindy Sheehan is on line one. Something about how the Left uses their own until they stop being the flavor of the month.
Category: Humor
White Pundits Can’t Jump
Since the end of the 2023 NCAA Women’s Basketball tournament, there’s been a lot of talk from fans and pundits alike. Not because it was an exciting game, but because of a gesture, or more precisely two gestures.
On one side, we have University of Iowa player Caitlin Clark, who used John Cena’s “U Can’t C Me” gesture during the tournament. Then, in the waning moments of the title game, LSU player Angel Reese did the same gesture (among others) back to Clark. When criticism of the latter started coming out, Leftists and their minions went right to playing the race card. Some even went so far as to say Clark’s post-game reaction (which was more gracious than anything said about her from the aforementioned Leftists) was a rejection of MAGA culture.
And, not surprisingly, they’re missing the point. Several points, in fact.
Remember when Leftists were pushing for more civility waaaaaaaaay back in 2020? Yeah, well, they’re fucking liars, but you already knew that. In this case, civility was thrown out the window because…Clark did it first. Yes, they went there, just like a four year old might. And just like a four year old’s argument, it doesn’t make it right. Whether you believe Clark’s gesture was inappropriate shouldn’t make a similar gesture by another player right, either.
But, I guess when you’re white, you always have to say you’re sorry.
To her credit, Clark has defended Reese and tried to put the controversy behind her. Which, of course, the Left can’t do because racism! To them, calling out Reese was tantamount to a double standard (which are the only standards Leftists have), instead of recognizing the lack of sportsmanship. If anything, Reese’s actions were dismissed as “trash talk” that only offended anyone who never did anything competitive in their lives.
Yeah, about that…
Without going too much into my less-than-illustrious basketball career, I’ve set foot on a basketball court and have felt the joy of victory and the agony of doing champions after a defeat. What Reese did was the height of disrespect and poor sportsmanship at a time when a lot more people had their eyes on the game than in previous years.
Because of Caitlin Clark.
Clark’s story is one of hard work, humility (for the most part), and being the best player on the court throughout the season. While that didn’t necessarily help her cut down the net after the finals, it’s something to be emulated. And what’s more, she recognizes who is watching her. While Reese has the championship, Clark has a self-made legacy.
But Clark and Reese aren’t the only people who deserve the spotlight here. Instead, let’s turn our attentions to two other players who truly elevated the sport I love, South Carolina’s Aliyah Boston and LSU’s Jasmine Carson.
I watched the press conference after Iowa beat South Carolina to get into the championship game, and to say I was impressed by Boston’s maturity, composure, and attitude would be an understatement. To showcase this, here is a link to that press conference because I truly lack the words to do it justice. I don’t know where Ms. Boston is going to end up, but I do know she has the right attitude and mindset to succeed.
Then, there’s Carson, whose 21 points off the bench in the first half for LSU was a difference maker. Reese might have been the star of the team, but Carson was the heart, and she seemingly could not miss in that first half, even sinking a shot to end the first half. And each time I saw her hit a 3 pointer, I saw absolute joy on her face. She was having the game of her life and the time of her life at the same time.
Two examples of players who showed more maturity and self-awareness than one of the focal points of the controversy. But who are we continuing to talk about? Angel Reese. Who is continually being defended for being a piss-poor winner? Angel Reese.
And who is ignoring the better angels in lieu of the more visible and outspoken “star”? A whole fucking lot of us.
To gin up a racial component when the real issue is a lack of sportsmanship is cynical and unnecessary. But when all you have to work with is race, everything becomes racial. Meanwhile, some of us are still content with the whole “content of one’s character” bit Martin Luther King, Jr. talked about extensively.
And for anyone who thinks I’m holding Reese to a higher standard than Clark, think again. I’m holding them both to the same standard: be gracious in victory and defeat. And yet, some people can’t help but find a way to limbo under than standard without even bending over 1 degree. Caitlin Clark may still have a ways to go, but I think she’ll be just fine as long as she doesn’t forget who she is and where she came from.
For Reese, I can’t help but pity her. She has the spotlight now and her talent will take her as far as she wants to go, but only if her attitude lets her. Fame, or infamy as the case may be, is fleeting. Without a good head space to go along with it, that fame will disappear as quickly as it appeared. I hope she learns this sooner rather than later because sports history is full of “Whatever happened to X” stories.
As far as the Left and the media (a redundancy, I know) are concerned, stop trying to make bad behavior justifiable because of race. A shitty person is a shitty person, no matter what their skin color is. Get your heads out of your own asses and call balls and strikes for once!
And now we return you to your regularly scheduled insane and somewhat humorous ranting already in progress.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
It’s been quite a week, dear readers. Between a NCAA Women’s Basketball title game that was officiated by people who beamed down from Saturn just before tip-off (not that I have an opinion on that mind you) and former President Donald Trump being indicted on 34 separate charges, it was hard to find a new or interesting take on topics that have already been through the spin cycle several times over.
Then, I saw a phrase that kept getting used by Leftists related to the Trump indictments: no one is above the law. This has always struck me as an interesting phrase, especially when used against Republicans who are experiencing legal troubles of their own. And our dear friends on the Left surely believe in fairness to all under the law. Just ask them!
So, that’s why I’m throwing the brown bullshit flag so we can review whether they mean what they say.
no one is above the law
What the Left thinks it means – everyone is accountable to the law
What it really means – some people are accountable to the law while others aren’t
Remember when former Vice Presidential candidate John Edwards said there were two Americas? Although he played second fiddle to someone who made Al Gore look like Alvin Ailey, he was right, but his focus was too limited. There are two Americas on several levels, especially in terms of criminal justice. Leftists were quick to pounce (which I thought only Republicans did) on the Trump indictments as proof that white collar crime is treated differently than other types of crime.
Which it is and has been repeatedly for decades. I’m definitely not disputing that. What I am disputing is how the concept of no one being above the law is actually applied when it comes to crimes with a political bent.
One of the benefits of having political or cultural power is being able to afford good lackeys…I mean employees. And to find even better fall guys…or fall women. No need to be sexist here when we’re dealing with a lack of accountability, right?
Anyway, when you’re able to surround yourself with people who can either keep you out of trouble by finding loopholes and sucking up to the right power brokers or who can take the fall so you can skate away like Brian Boitano, you are practically untouchable. Sure, you might get socked every so often with lighter charges (like getting charged with an overdue library book after being found killing a nun at high noon in Times Square), but most of the time, you’re golden because you have the gold to make it happen.
That fact alone makes the Left’s “no one is above the law” bullshit, well, bullshit. But to add to the what-the-actual-fuckitude of these situaitons, when you add politics to the mix, you get people willing to protect you at all costs. And this is the really fucked up part of it: the political animals being protected by the mobs of adoring fans more obedient than Renfield was to Dracula give one-one-trillionth-of-a-fuck about those fans. They are useful idiots, with a heavy emphasis on the idiot part.
Guess that that means, kids. The same people who say no one is above the law become hypocrites when it’s one of theirs trying to be above the law.
Told ya it was fucked up.
Which brings us to the Trump indictments. Others far more knowledgeable than me have already talked about the legal shitshow ahead of us, so I will leave them to discuss the judicial ins and outs. The parts I will cover revolve around just how deep this indictment rabbit hole goes and just how far Leftists are willing to pervert the rule of law just to get Trump.
Let’s start with Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg. The protagonist or antagonist (depending on how much you hate Trump) ran on an anti-Trump plank, citing the work he did on the investigation of alleged crimes prior to being elected. Under most circumstances, this would be enough to raise some eyebrows as to whether his office could be impartial. And when you consider a) Bragg is a Democrat, and b) the DA position is an elected position, the political aspects cannot be overlooked and can definitely be seen as a conflict of interest.
But, in Trump’s favor, Bragg appears to be inept, so he’s got that going for him.
Oh, and did I mention he got donations from Color of Change? This progressive movement works to try to address the racial inequities in the judicial system (meaning they want blacks to be incapable of being held accountable for crimes they commit). Even beyond that, some of their board members worked previously with SEIU, the Aspen Institute, and other progressive organizations at least partially funded by…Uncle George Soros. And when you consider Color of Change both got donations from Soros and donated some of their money to Bragg’s campaign, let’s just say the Star Chamber looks a lot more like King Solomon’s court by comparison.
And before you Leftists say it, pointing this shit out isn’t anti-Semitic. I could care less what faith, if any, he professes. A bad actor is a bad actor. I would criticize Soros in the same breath I criticize Joel Osteen and for the same thing.
Well, that, and the fact Osteen’s teeth are whiter than the DNC.
That brings us to Judge Juan Merchan, who will be presiding over this shitshow…I mean trial. No, wait, I do mean shitshow. The good judge donated a small amount of money to the Biden/Harris campaign as well as to other progressive causes. Sure, it’s not much in the grand scheme of things…until you consider his daughter worked for a progressive organization called Authentic …whose clientele include Kamala Harris, Gavin Newsom, and…the Biden/Harris campaign. And the list is even longer according to their website.
So again, a conflict of interest, but since it favors the Left, it’s okay!
No wonder people think we have a two-tiered judicial system.
And here’s the thing. For all the people who are cheering the Trump indictments, you can find plenty of examples on both sides of the aisle of politicians and figures who are literally above the law. Hunter Biden ring a bell? Of course, he’s just the son of the President who just so happened to be caught doing drugs, owning a firearm in spite of being legally prohibited from owning it, and a few other minor scandals including possible illicit deals with China. But he’s a private citizen, so we really shouldn’t pick on him, right?
Okay, I’ll agree to that.
But some of the following people weren’t private citizens when they committed their crimes:
Bill Clinton
Hillary Clinton
Barack Obama
Joe Biden
Adam Schiff
Nancy Pelosi
Harry Reid
Ted Kennedy
Christopher Dodd
Gretchen Whitmer
Alexandria Ocasio Cortez
Ilhan Omar
Kamala Harris
Maxine Waters
Need I go on? And I can produce the receipts of each and every one of their crimes. Try me.
And, yes, I know Trump isn’t the only Republican to seemingly skate when it comes to legal matters. But that reinforces the major point: Leftists are fucking hypocrites. They want justice (or at least a Pablo Picasso version of it) for everyone else, but don’t you dare hold them accountable for the illegal shit they do because…reasons.
So, we’re stuck. With political influence taking over the judicial branch like a case of the clap, there is no easy way to fix it. Given the political sideshow of the Trump indictments, you could get arrested for wrongthink before you could say “doubleplusungood” on the whims of a Leftist prosecutor or judge. And believe me they are just that petty. Even after charges are dropped, you’re still guilty. Just ask Kyle Rittenhouse.
Then, there are the people who can commit any number of crimes and never see the inside of a courtroom for them. I’m looking at you, BLM and Antifa. You can cause all the chaos you want, and you will always get the fiery but mostly peaceful benefit of the doubt.
I wish I could give you a happy ending or some inspirational speech to make things right again, but I can’t. As long as there are people who can get away with crimes no matter what, Lady Justice is best kept blind out of fear of what she might see out of the so-called judicial system today.
A Wolf in Sheep(skin)’s Clothing?
Leftists have been known to…exaggerate situations that directly affect their grift…I mean policy decisions. But sometimes they get one right. Granted, it’s usually rarer than how I like my steak, but it does happen.
Recently, House Republicans introduced the Parents Bill of Rights Act designed to help parents of public school students to exercise more oversight over curricula and offer opportunities to provide feedback. Although this proposal has garnered praise from former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo and damnation from Leftist asshats Aaron Rupar and Jonathan Capehart, the bill is likely to fail in the Senate because that’s where ideas go to get turned into expensive boondoggles these days.
For all the great intentions the Parents Bill of Rights Act has, there is a road to Hell we need to traverse before we throw support behind the bill.
First, let’s start with what the Left got right…I mean correct about the proposal. A tweet in response to Secretary Pompeo’s original tweet points out the inherent problem with the current public education system: a lack of parental participation. Usually, it’s because the parents complaining about it are too busy working, but it’s hard to argue the point. Parental involvement in a child’s education should start in the home, and not just for homeschooled kids, either!
It’s easy to pawn off the responsibilities due to anything from time constraints to not really wanting to do them, but if you’re complaining now that a book promoting gay sex under the guise of “education,” you’ve identified a problem: you weren’t paying attention to when this shit was being put into schools. And given the number of freaks out there teaching children these days (as can be found on the Libs of TikTok Twitter account), you might want to make the time to get involved.
Of course, we can trust our government to do the right thing. I mean, it’s not like there’s a proven track record of the government fucking up something like public education, right? But, at least with the government involved, it won’t wind up like, oh I don’t know, a train accident in Ohio.
If you believe that, I have a great deal on some FTX for ya!
Anyway, the problems being “addressed” by this legislation continue the cycle of big government involvement in something that really isn’t the federal government’s business in the first place. Or at least it wasn’t until the Department of Education was founded. Nowadays, you can’t seem to send Bobby and Cindy to public school without having the DOE having its fingers in it, which is a Brady Bunch of bullshit.
And, as much as it pains me to say it, the Parents Bill of Rights Act only continues that trend. Regardless of how you feel about what’s going on in public schools today, passing legislation to do something we can and should be doing for ourselves isn’t going to end well.
Politicians in general are always trying to find ways to carve out exceptions or use the existing system to advance ideological goals, even if it means warping the original intent of the legislation. All it takes is a swing in one direction or another and before you can say “detention” you lose more of your freedoms.
And, no, the fact this is a Republican-lead bill doesn’t make it any better. A freedom removed is damn hard to get back, regardless of which major party took it away in the first place. Just ask gun owners about that.
And don’t expect any help from the Left on this. They have a vested interest in keeping the status quo the way it is right now. Graduates may not be able to function in any meaningful way, but at least they’ll know their fee-fees are valued. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear it was almost like the Left wants people to be dumber than Puddin’ Head Joe after a NyQuil binge because then it would be easier to make them do stupid and dangerous stuff without questioning it…oh, wait…
Say, that reminds me, I’m due for my 498th COVID booster. I’m sure it will work this time and without horrible side effects!
Seriously, though, putting government in charge of responsibilities we should be taking on rarely ends well and only perpetuates the current system, which sucks out loud.
But let’s blue sky this idea. Let’s say by some miracle/deal with the Devil/funky AI algorithm/glitch in the Matrix the Parental Bill of Rights Act gets passed. That doesn’t mean it’s going to be followed, especially by those who have a vested interest in keeping people stupid and, thus, dependent on government. All it takes is a different politician of a different political persuasion to roll everything back, putting us at Square One all over again, but with more government intervention.
Fucking brilliant!
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
Granted, I’m a week late on this, but under the circumstances (namely me deciding to write about something else), I hope you’ll forgive me. And if not, well…I’ll pout.
Anyway, California is usually at the forefront of a lot of things, namely really bad ideas. Recently, San Francisco proposed a lump sum payment of $5 million to eligible blacks for reparations, among other proposals. Additionally, the state’s Reparation Task Force submitted a report to the California Legislature that Governor Gavin Newsom is expected to implement if the legislature doesn’t act.
As a result, I am stating for the record I now self-identify as a black resident of San Francisco. Please respect my privacy during my transition.
Seriously, reparations is a controversial subject to say the least, which means it’s perfect for your favorite blogger who writes a weekly series by this specific title to cover. Take that, “Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week” written by Jerry Funklemeyer!
reparations
What the Left thinks it means – monetary compensation given to blacks due to America’s slave history
What it really means – another way for white Leftists to blow through more of our money so they can feel good about themselves
The Civil War/War Between the States/War of Northern Aggression/The War the Movie “Glory” Was Based On was one of the most difficult and bloody times of our nation’s relatively young history. From 1861 to 1865, this country was more fractured than Jackie Chan’s body after doing his own stunts. But once the Union prevailed, the question was what to do next. Back then, they didn’t have Leftists to provide their sage advice about misogyny and trans rights in the former Confederacy, so it came down to a meeting between William T. Sherman and black ministers to create an attempt at reparations: 40 acres. (Mule, sold separately.)
And that attempt got scuttled by President Andrew Johnson, leaving the matter unresolved until recently.
There have been calls for reparations in recent history, but the idea really took off in 2020 thanks to the Democratic Primaries where there were…four black candidates out of 27. Five if you count Elizabeth Warren. And of those black candidates, none got the nomination, and only one (Kamala Harris) got to the White House as Puddin’ Head Joe’s Vice-President. Not too shabby for someone who I almost tied in the Iowa Caucuses and I didn’t even run.
Out of that and the shootings of blacks that occurred in 2019-2020, the idea of reparations gained new steam, which prompted California to create the aforementioned Reparations Task Force.
So, now that we’re back in the present, let’s start shitting on the reparations idea, shall we?
As a concept, reparations aren’t that hard to understand. We wronged an entire race of people by enslaving them and treating them worse than Ike treated Tina, so we want to try to balance the scales somehow. Admirable goal, but the logistical equivalent of an M.C. Escher drawing.
The biggest hurdle to the idea of reparations is the fact none of the people who are demanding it today were ever slaves. And it’s not like we can fire up the TARDIS, go back to 1865, drop off $5 million, and tell the slaves to invest heavily in Apple in 100+ years. Although time can be a big ball of wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff, it’s still bound by fixed events that can be tracked. And with the passage of time comes the birth of generation after generation that are removed from slavery altogether, save by bloodline.
But does bloodline alone create a solid enough link to award $5 million? That creates another speed bump to payday: what about those who either didn’t own slaves or fought for the Union in the Civil War? If bloodline is enough to give away money, it should also be good enough to exempt people from being forced to contribute to this monetary transfer. I have two relatives who fought for the Union (who, by the way, fought at least in part to end slavery). Yet, I get the feeling I would be expected to open my wallet and give generously to the Give Non-Slaves $5 Million Because Fuck You That’s Why Foundation.
And don’t get me started on their telethons!
Then, there’s the question of mixed-race children. Back in the day, white slaveowners knocked boots with slaves, which resulted in the genes of both races coming together to form a new life. Would the families of such a sexual union have to pay up or receive reparations? Or maybe they would just get $2.5 million? Or would the white half have to pay the black half $5 million?
Regardless, the fact we can even ask some of these questions without the pro-reparations side coming up with answers is not a good sign. But wait, there’s more!
Dropping $5 million into anyone’s lap is going to be significant, and it opens up any number of opportunities. And if it’s bundled in hundred dollar bills, it’s going to make the males in the audience sing tenor for a few years. For most people, though, it’s life-changing money, but only if it’s used intelligently. This is where human nature comes into play. If we get any amount of money from $2 on a scratch-off ticket to millions of dollars, our first instinct is to spend it. If this sum comes with few strings attached, though, we can get pretty reckless with it because in our minds it’s “free money.”
But just as any breadwinner today can tell you, money can run out fast if you’re not careful. Or if you vote for Puddin’ Head Joe, which is pretty much the same thing as not being careful.
When we don’t know or care how we get the money, we have less of an incentive to be smart with it. And, no, this isn’t a racial thing, but rather a human thing. Economists have studied this phenomenon for decades and it always ends the same way: the further we are away from earning money, the easier it gets to spend. Hence, the reason so many big lottery winners end up blowing their winnings and winding up right back where they started.
Guess what I think will happen to the reparations money if it gets approved.
And it’s not like there isn’t precedent with this. Remember Hurricane Katrina (which, oddly or appropriately enough, was the last time Kanye West was relevant)? Well, some inventive (and ultimately dishonest) people found a way to turn tragedy into a windfall to the tune of an estimated $2 billion. Between recipients of the aid spending the money on non-essential items, including vacations and porn, and others getting relief funds for people who didn’t exist, Katrina proved to be a disaster of a natural disaster response.
But the Katrina failure was more federal, right? Nothing like that could happen on the state level, right? Wellllll…not really. Our good friends on the Left Coast racked up an estimated $20 billion in fraud related to the pandemic. Leftists bad with money? Why that’s…pretty normal, really.
Now, why would I bring up Katrina and COVID in a discussion about reparations? To underscore a point that will taint the idea: governments, especially large ones, don’t keep good tabs on who is getting the money. It’s more of a rubber-stamp process. Granted, the reparations initiative in San Francisco comes with some conditions, but I’m not sure the state government that racked up ten times the Katrina fraud is capable of making sure the conditions are met.
But then again, it’s not meant to be effective or efficient except in one area: easing the guilt white Leftists feel over slavery. And they’re willing to spend as much of your money as possible to make sure they feel better no matter how long it takes! When you consider the amount of guilt a Leftist could prevent brownouts in California if it could be converted into electricity, let’s just say you might as well give the government access to your bank accounts. I mean, if China doesn’t already have it, thanks to TikTok.
It’s at this point I need to remind the white Leftists…none of you fuckknuckles were alive during slavery. You can feel bad about what happened generations ago, but to make it a central part of your life is a bit extreme and at this point silly. Kinda like the Young Turks, but less comedic. You cannot change the past, nor can you expect any amount of money to ever make it right because there will always be people willing to prey on your guilt to get more money out of you. As long as the greedy and dishonest among us see Leftist largess as free money, the spigot will never turn completely off and there will be fraud aplenty.
The thing is the Left has made it amazingly easy to game the system, thanks to the rhetoric they’ve already presented as true. And eagle-eyed readers already know how. Remember, the Left maintains how you self-identify is as real as how you are. Rachel Dolezal and Shawn King both identify as black in spite of being whiter than a medical isolation room run by Mormon IBM executives. Yet, they were/are considered to be authentic voices on the black experience in America.
Well, shit. If they can do it, so can I. And I can think of 5 million reasons to do it!
And California can’t say shit about it. Well, they can, but they’ll look like hypocritical assholes doing it. So, win-win!
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
This week, the word “woke” got a bit of a workout. I’m not talking Richard Simmons “Sweating With the Oldies” kind of workout, either. We’re talking The Rock on truck stop speed locked in a Gold’s Gym for a weekend kind of workout. And after that, I definitely don’t want to know what the Rock was cookin’.
After people on the Right started to adopt “woke” as a term of derision, Leftists haven’t been able to figure out a way to take it back. So, instead, they’re creating new rules. And with that, this week’s Lexicon will delve into the wonderfully wide weird world of woke.
woke
What the Left thinks it means – either a word of pride or derision, depending on who uses it
What it really means – a term that needs to go the way of the dodo and Carrot Top’s movie career
Remember the 90s when Political Correctness was all the rage? People bent over backwards to use the “correct” (and often nonsensical) words. Then, it grew to the point where even the most PC of PC people got caught using non-PC terms because the term changed without warning from one week to the next. It was like playing hot potato with a live hand grenade while blindfolded. It’s only a matter of time before you’re getting shrapnel.
Well, thanks to the “woke” warriors out there, we get to relive one of my least favorite times of my adult life. Fortunately, I’m older and I give even less of a fuck than I did back then. The only difference? The current woke environment makes the PC movement of the 90s look like an Amish barn raising, complete with beards. Although with the woke folks, the beards might be connected to men who claim to be women.
Anyway, “woke” has gone from a funny term used by white Leftists so much you think they’re getting paid to use it to an entire culture. But only the first 4/7 of the word.
When the Right started using the word “woke” like an insult or a derogatory term, the Left lost its collectivist mind. After all, to them being woke is the end all and be all of existence. So, when people started making fun of it, it became an affront to them and their cause and they were forced to act!
By adding more context to its use.
But first, a slight aside. Woke actually began in the black community where it was used to raise awareness to racism and discrimination. Over time, the perspective grew to encompass more and more social justice ideas to the point white Leftists adopted it and made it mainstream. After all, the only way blacks can get ahead is if white Leftists speak for them, amirite kids?
Yeah, no.
Over the past week, the Left has expanded the definition even more. For Leftists, woke is still a good thing, but it’s also become a way to claim moral and intellectual superiority over everyone. Or in other words, Tuesday. John Stewart said being woke was “being good at history.” Molly Knight (who is whiter than a mayonnaise sandwich on Wonder Bread) echoes this sentiment by throwing in slavery.
Then, there’s the virtue signaling. And when I say virtue signaling, I mean virtue signaling!
Now, for the other side. Leftists love to use the Right’s use of the word to state their opposition is based on being stupid. And being the worst people on Earth. And being triggered. Oh, and when the Right uses it, it’s racist! And, of course, the Left thinks the Right can’t define it.
The Left thinks woke is a positive. The Right thinks woke is a negative. I think woke is the past tense form of wake.
As much as both sides love to throw around the term, it’s gotten to the point of ridiculousness, mostly because adherents keep pushing the envelope like a postal worker only getting paid commission. Seriously, folks. How exactly does allowing kids to be exposed to drag shows where performers are exposing themselves bring about a better world? And, no, my conservative friends, not that scenario isn’t an example of society getting too woke. It’s an example of people being fucking narcissists and demanding the rest of us go along with their fantasy world.
Right now woke isn’t anything but a meaningless term that keeps changing definitions more frequently than models at a fashion show. And, to me, when you have trouble nailing down a definition that doesn’t come without an exceptions list longer than an Apple Terms of Service Agreement, the problem isn’t the definition; it’s the word. Whenever you have a word that can be used in multiple ways and is solely dependent upon who is using it as far as whether it’s the “right” or “wrong” definition, you create the ambiguity necessary for the word to be used in whatever way people want.
Guess what, kids. “Woke” is no longer a simple word that means only one thing. It’s expanded and is not the Left’s word anymore. It belongs to the people now, and it will continue to be used until it’s burnt out.
Now, how would I define woke? Aside from being the past tense version of wake, in the modern sense of the word I define it as Political Correctness 2.0. Or Political Correctness on PCP. Sayyyyyyyy!
Either way, I’m not a fan of the term, nor am I a fan of how it’s being used to further divide us. Instead of woke, let me offer a slightly longer, but a far more universal concept.
Being a decent human being, respectful of others and not being a fucking asshole.
That’s not too much of an ask, is it?
Editor’s Note: This next section was added after Thomas went to the grocery store.
Fuck that last thing I wrote. The SMOD can’t come soon enough.
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
This week was a big one for our friends at Fox News. Sure, the Left loves to talk about the Dominion defamation lawsuit against the network, but the Fox hate was cranked up to 12 (because 11 just won’t do) because of Tucker Carlson showing previously unreleased security footage from January 6th. You know, that insurrection that simultaneously could have destroyed the nation and was run by dumb Trump supporters?
Well, since both Leftists and, well, other Leftists are losing their collectivist shit over the footage, I figured it was time to take a look at the little cable network that could…bitch slap CNN and MSNBC into oblivion.
Fox News
What the Left thinks it means – a radical right wing network that lies to the country, thus becoming a national security threat
What it really means – a right-leaning network that represents everything the Left fears/hates
Fox News Channel began in 1996 from humble beginnings. Well, as humble as can be while being funded by a wealthy Australian. Anyway, Fox News was established as an alternative to the media, who lean so far left they walk at a 5 degree angle perpendicular to the ground, and it proved to be very successful. No longer did we have Leftist talking heads telling us what and how to think about the events of the day. Now, we had “fair and balanced” news.
Kinda.
It’s hard to overcome personal biases in the media, but Fox News at least tried to do it for a long time, and they still do. But try to convince a Leftist raised on Rachel Maddow and Keith Olbermann of that. They’ll continue to say Fox News isn’t really news because of all the lies they tell.
Seriously? Have you fucknuckles looked in the mirror lately?
Where the Left gets things twisted is a common blind spot for people: separating news from opinion. To the Left, the two are inseparable as they believe their opinions are facts. Granted, the Right does this as well, but in their defense people on the Right can be persuaded with facts most of the time. Their ego isn’t tied to being correct. The Left’s is.
But actual reporting has little to do with ego. The journalism of even the past 50 years has gone from hitting the pavement to hitting up a Leftist politician on Twitter to get a quote for a story that’s pretty much plug-and-play. Just add a quote or two, make Republicans look bad, and you’re done.
Fox News’ actual reporting isn’t anything like that from what I’ve seen. For one, they get blocked by Twitter Leftists. But more importantly the reporters on staff do amazing work. Even former Fox News contributors like Catherine Herridge found work after leaving it because of her reputation as a strong, driven reporter. And if you look at the body of her work, you’ll find a common theme: report the facts without emotional attachments. She’s like a female Data.
This blurring of lines between news and opinion actually makes the rest of the media look bad, mainly because they assume Fox News does what they do, only with more of a conservative bent. Of course, Leftists think…excuse me…AHAAAHAAAAAHAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAAA!
So, where was I? Oh, yes, Leftist media.
Being anything to the right of the Socialist Socialite makes you incredible to Leftists, and not in a good way. Once you get branded as a conservative, Leftists no longer consider you to be human, let alone credible. Just ask Matt Taibbi, a reporter that used to work for Leftist rag Rolling Stone and is now reporter-non-grata for his role in the Twitter Files.
Yet, this is lazy thinking. Dismissing a source solely because of political leanings is silly. You need to take the time and really look at the body of work before you determine how badly they suck. Then, you can dismiss them.
In the case of Fox News, I can’t completely dismiss them for having no credibility. Their news side is consistently running circles around the competition by being good at their jobs. It’s the commentary side that ultimately hurts the network. Sure, they have solid contributors like Brit Hume, Greg Gutfeld, Tammy Bruce, and Tulsi Gabbard, people whose opinions aren’t hidden and even-handed.
Then, there’s the hard pro-Trump side like Laura Ingraham and Sean Hannity, neither of one I can stand because they just find ways to say the same things over and over again night after night. If I wanted to hear Trump talking points, I would go right to the source, not filtered through people whose opinions I care less about than the insane homeless man I see on my way to work. Although the homeless guy did give me some great stock tips…
Regardless, Fox News is doing something right because they continue to dominate the cable news ratings. Granted, ratings doesn’t always mean quality. I’m looking right at you “Friends.” You owe me 3 years of my life back watching Ross and Rachel. And no number of times singing “Smelly Cat” will make up for it.
Yet, Fox News has enough crossover appeal that it gets people on the Left and the Right to watch. This link is from 2019, so the numbers may have changed, but the fact Fox News continues to dominate month after month, year after year, makes it harder to dismiss the network as niche. Even with the Dominion lawsuit looming over them, it just doesn’t matter.
And that’s what pisses off Leftists the most. No matter what they do, no matter how many boycotts or hashtags they come up with, Fox News keeps chugging along, making CNN and MSNBC fight for the scraps. Or scrap for the scraps, if you prefer (and I do).
Of course, the Left can’t let that happen, so they’re doing what they can to attack Fox News. Hence, the accusations they’re a threat to national security and lie all the time. And hence the reason they have to lie about what Fox News is.
A lot of the “Fox News is a national security threat” bullshit arose in the aftermath of January 6th, a dark day in our history where…let me check my notes…a bunch of people attended a rally in Washington, DC, to protest an election they felt was stolen and some asshats decided to be destructive dicks. Apparently, protesting the results of a contested election is a national security threat to the Left.
House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries? Please pick up the white courtesy phone. You may be a national security threat.
Where Fox News comes into the picture is related to the Dominion lawsuit in that the network is alleged to have lied to its viewers about the 2020 Presidential election being stolen, which prompted the January 6th “insurrection,” which as we’ve been told is worse than 9/11, Pearl Harbor, and another “Scary Movie” sequel…combined.
I won’t dispute Fox News had a hand in the “stolen election” narrative. What I do dispute is that they knowingly lied. I didn’t vote for Trump or Puddin’ Head Joe, so I don’t really have a dog in the hunt, but I can’t completely dismiss the idea there was some funky shit going down at the polls. Polling places running out of ballots, allegations of renewed counting after most of the vote counters had left, and other irregularities became the coin of the Trump realm. I can’t say every accusation of election irregularities could be substantiated with facts, but there were enough to make me question whether the results we got on Election Day 2020 were real or Memorex. And, me being the curious boy I am, I want to get to the bottom of it.
And apparently Fox News did, too. When the rest of the media dismissed the possibility of election fraud out of hand (while saying the 2016 election was fundamentally flawed because of Russia, Russia, Russia), Fox News became the contrarian and started to look at what happened with a critical eye.
You know, like reporters are supposed to do?
But is this questioning a threat to national security? In a word. In two words, fuck no. In three words, fuckity fuck no. In four words…well, let’s just say there’s a lot more variations of “fuck” used.
The First Amendment says Congress cannot pass laws prohibiting the redress of grievances against the government. If a rally about possible election fraud isn’t a redress of grievances, I don’t know what is. At the very least, the January 6 protestors had a Constitutional right to do what they did. Once they breached the rules of decorum to commit criminal acts, that protection goes the way of Kamala Harris’ Presidential hopes in 2024.
On top of that, the concept of January 6th being a “riot” or an “insurrection” is being undone by the security footage being shown. Most of the people at the rally stayed outside, and those who gained access to the Capitol mostly…took a tour, some with the help of the Capitol Police on duty that day.
But wait a minute! Wouldn’t that prove the Left’s narrative about January 6th is full of shit? Why, yes…yes it would! But they can’t just say “The real reason we lied about January 6th is because we got scared by a bunch of non-violent Americans who disagree with us” because it would go over as well as giving David Duke an NAACP Image Award.
And not to put too fine a point on this, but who was President on January 6, 2021? That would be Donald Trump, not Puddin’ Head Joe. There was no transfer of power, no transition (except maybe for some members of the Biden Administration), and no attempt to overthrow the government. For January 6th to be an actual insurrection, the protestors/”rioters” would have to be seeking to overthrow…the man they supported for President in 2020. Fox News broadcasting security footage doesn’t make the lack of logic behind the “insurrection” go away, nor is it nearly as horrible as the Left wants to make it out to be. The only real threat with releasing the security footage isn’t to national security, but to the security of the Leftist narrative.
Now, for the lying. Not on my part, but to the allegations Fox News misinforms its viewers. Let’s just say any major media outlet that pushed even one-tenth of the stories about Russiagate being real should take all the seats. Much of what passes for reporting these days revolves around lying, whether it be omitting context, fabricating stories to advance a narrative, or spinning events to make one side look better than the other. In fact, most of the “reporters” today should get an additional pay for being the DNC’s steno pool.
Fox News is no different, except for the DNC steno pool bit. They do exactly what the rest of the media do, only for the Right instead of the Left. That’s not meant as an excuse, but rather an observation built over 35 years of studying the media both formally and informally. It’s hypocritical for the Left to hold Fox News to a higher standard than they hold themselves, but it’s par for the Alinsky course. Not that you’d ever get an actual admission of dishonesty from the Left, mind you. They’re still clinging to the “very fine people on both sides” lie as though it were a security blanket.
So, is Fox News as bad as its critics say it is? Yes, and no. They are a product of the current media environment and are guilty of at least some of the sins attributed to it. Overall, they’re no better or worse than any other media outlet, and much of the criticism levied against it is the result of partisan hyperbole. Having said that, Fox News has a lot of room to improve. Don’t fall back on reciting RNC/Donald Trump talking points and go back to reporting that lives up to the “fair and balanced” standard.
Oh, and fire Geraldo Rivera. He’s as useful as tits on Michael Moore.
New Words, Who Dis?
As faithful readers know, I’m a word guy. I am fascinated by the interplay of words put together to form everything from poetry and screenplays to Twitter posts, mainly for the number of times people confuse “to” and “too” and even “two.”
As part of my passion, I’ve learned to study how words are used and compare them to the time period. There are some words, like “cool,” that never seem to fall out of favor, while others like “extreme” or “Pauly Shore comedy” come and go with the passage of time. And every so often, our societal lexicon (not to be confused with the Leftist Lexicon) needs to get expanded to reflect the zeitgeist of the age.
In other words, here are some new words I came up with. Enjoy!
Algoreaphobia – the fear of climate change
selfietality – when someone dies while doing something stupid to try to get views on social media
entitlemental – a form of insanity that arises when someone believes they are owed something
reminiscinging – when you find yourself singing songs from your youth because today’s music fucking sucks
noledge – the “facts” most people use in Twitter arguments
Mandatorian – when someone tells you that you “have to watch” the latest popular streaming series
prenouns – the pronouns you are expected to know before talking to a Leftist
insoyfurable – when someone insists on telling you his or her dietary/lifestyle choices without anyone else asking them to do it
showflake – the person who makes a big deal about being offended, i.e. any Karen/Kevin
gender disphonya – a condition where a person claims to be a different gender, but doesn’t bother to actually transition
in-app-propriate – when you spend too much on microtransactions
NFTease – the pitch scammers use to get you to invest in NFTs
That’s all I have for now. If you liked this, let me know and I can do more. If you didn’t, then you might be disappointed if I decide to do another one. I’m good either way!
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
After 3 years of COVID-19 coverage, we’re starting to come to a new understanding of what happened or could have happened. Of course, it was Russia, Russia, Russia!
One of the early hypotheses about COVID’s origins was it originated in a lab in Wuhan, China, and got out. Of course, the Left said it was bullshit and went about limiting even the illusion of a debate by getting social media companies to censor those who advanced the idea as plausible. Now, the FBI, Department of Energy, and other government entities are starting to say there might be something to the lab leak theory.
Which means we get to talk about it a bit more!
I know you’re out there. I can hear you groaning.
lab leak theory
What the Left thinks it means – a plausible, yet not seriously considered explanation for the spread of COVID-19
What it really means – a prime example of the Left controlling a narrative until it no longer benefits them
Just in case any Interwebs Po-Po are reading this, I must say I am not a doctor, nor should anything I say be considered medical advice. I’m just a guy who paid a little attention in high school science classes and occasionally makes humorous comments about the absurdity of life. Do not take my commentary seriously and don’t take any actions that goes against your legal and moral best interests without checking with your doctor, your religious leader, your family, some guy name Earl, or a tax professional. Hell, talk to them all just to be safe!
Now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s fuck up a narrative!
As faithful readers know, I like to do mental exercises to see how plausible an idea is. When there are breaks in the logic that can’t be explained away with an equally plausible explanation or after a couple of drinks, I dismiss it.
The lab leak theory? Not as easily dismissed as the Left made it sound.
Before COVID-19 became a household word (mainly because we weren’t supposed to leave the house), lab leaks weren’t uncommon. In fact, it keeps happening over and over again. At this rate, security guards in California are more secure than some labs!
So, this raises the question of why the Left’s tune changed with COVID-19 if they knew lab leaks were fairly common in recent history. It’s simple: President Donald Trump. After seeing Trump beat Hillary Clinton in 2016, the Left had a Paul Bunyon-sized ax to grind and would resort to any means to get rid of Trump.
Even denying the science they claimed to be following from the jump.
And, yes, I’m just as shocked as you are that Leftists would lie so brazenly and expect us not to pay attention.
Yet, in spite of their best efforts to keep it quiet, the Left couldn’t completely drown out the lab leak theory because there was just enough there there to keep it alive. That’s the way all conspiracy theories work: find a kernel of truth (i.e. there is fluoride in our drinking water), expand it a little bit (i.e. the federal government is putting fluoride in our drinking water), and then add to it to absurd lengths (i.e. the federal government is putting fluoride in our drinking water for mind control).
Come to think of it, that sounds a lot like what global warming cultists do…naaaaaaah!
Even so, the lab leak theory never got to the last stage, but the Left made it look like it was there through the media coverage and their government lackeys. But, as so many matters originally dismissed as conspiracy theories these days, the truth started to make its way out and made the conspiracy a reality. Then, the media started to change their tune a bit to lessen the blow by admitting there was merit to the lab leak theory, but it was Trump’s fault it wasn’t taken seriously.
In other words, Leftist default position 1.
But this narrative falls apart because it’s an example of a logical fallacy called poisoning the well. In short, it’s when a party tries to discredit another party’s claims through character assassination rather than an actual argument. In other words, Leftist default position 2. Regardless of how you feel about a source, when he or she tells the truth, it’s the truth and should be recognized as such.
The fact Donald Trump was the most vocal and visible advocate of the lab leak theory made it easier for Leftists to dismiss it, but now the government they voted into office is saying he may be right after all makes it harder to dismiss now. And justifiably so. The possibility of COVID-19 escaping from a Chinese lab isn’t that far-fetched and seemed much more plausible than wet market bat-du-joir theory.
Now, the Left’s entire approach has been rendered more worthless than a Pauly Shore NFT, and they’re scrambling to memory-hole what they said before. The Left hates to be proven wrong on anything, so when it happens, they treat it like most children do: ignore it until it goes away and lie about it throughout. And as any parent will tell you, it doesn’t work.
And it won’t work here. Or it won’t work if we’re willing to stand firm on the side of the truth. Every time a Leftist comes around to accept the lab leak theory (rarer than how Dracula takes his steak tartare, but I’m trying to be optimistic), thank them for joining you on the right side of this issue and welcome them to the truth. And if they don’t run away screaming like they’ve been doused with holy water (or soap and water for that matter), show them the grace they didn’t show you. Not only is it the right thing to do, but it will piss them off to no end because it will be another Leftist idea that is proven wrong.
Irreconcilable Differences
It was bound to happen, kids. Marjorie Taylor Greene said something that almost made my head explode with the sheer stupidity of it. Recently she came out and said we need a “national divorce” between red and blue states. As much fun as it would be to have America turned into a sitcom trope, I think this is a bad idea. Why?
For one, because the idea started from a 2004 meme.
But more importantly, because it’s going to lead to civil war, no matter what MTG says. Right now, ideological rifts are wider than Steven Tyler’s mouth at a dental appointment. People on the Left and the Right wake up and choose violence, hatred, and half-witted squawking points from their shit-flingers of choice.
At the core of this strife is a fundamental difference, not just of ideas, but of reality itself. Take gender, for example. Right now, Leftists believe there are more genders than Baskin Robbins has ice cream flavors (dining tip: avoid the Gender Fluid Fudge Ripple), while the Right believes there are only two. Now, I’m not a biologist or a Supreme Court nominee for that matter, but if we’re going to fight over something that hasn’t become an issue until the past few years and isn’t rooted in the age-old conflict of reality versus feefees, something tells me splitting up the country will end badly.
Just think about the sheer logistics of such an enterprise. Although there are clear red and blue states, there are a number of purple states, such as my home state of Iowa. Sometimes, we vote for Democrats, and other times we vote for Republicans. Where exactly would we fit? Would it turn into a custody battle between California and Texas where we spend two weekends a month with one state and the other two weekends with the other? And what if one state lets us stay up past our bedtimes and buys us all the toys, games, and gadgets we want in an attempt to appear to be the “cool state”? Then, there would be getting used to our new “step-states” and trying to fit in.
These are the kind of questions people gung ho for a national divorce haven’t considered yet, if they’ve considered them at all.
The sad part is, having said all that, I don’t see any way out of it. There are too many differences for us to try to work on as a nation, and when we can’t even agree on how many genders there are, it’s pretty much destined to fail. There is no reimagined version of the Yalta Conference coming soon to a TV screen near you. America is, to put it bluntly, stuck in a swamp of our own creation. And I’m not talking about Washington, DC.
And don’t expect our national leaders to lend a hand. Not only do they get off on us being at each other’s throats like a Nosferatu fistfight, but the strife helps them get away with more underhanded shit. The wallet-busting multi-trillion dollar Omnibus Spending Bill from a few weeks ago proved that. And as long as the Left and the Right continue to let us bicker, the wheels of the country get further and further sucked into the marsh, making it harder for us to get out.
So, what do we do? First off, we should reject the idea of a national divorce, no matter who agrees with it, because the eventual conclusion of such an idea will be bloody, messy, and possibly fracture the country even more than it already is. Besides, we’ve already done this. Remember that little thing the kids like to call the Civil War/War Between the States/War of Northern Aggression/That Thing We Have Totally Forgotten About or Never Learned in the First Place Because Racism? Yeah, Gettysburg is gonna look like a Buddhist picnic compared ot what we have in store.
Beyond that…I got nothing. No, wait, I do have something: look past the differences we have and look for the similarities. At the end of the day, we’re all Americans (unless you’re reading this in a different country…but I can put in a good word for you and make sure you get the Honorary American tour package). It doesn’t matter if you’re a Trump-loving Republican named Roy or a non-binary genderfluid person named Magnolia with more pronouns than college majors, there are still some things that can bring us all together.
You know, like thinking Michael Bay should never make another movie ever?