To say it’s been a rough few months for Democrats is an understatement. Oh, they were able to stem the tide of the “Red Wave” (thanks in part to idiots like Mitch McConnell), but since then they’ve been accumulating L’s like the world’s unluckiest Scrabble player.
Recently, we heard about President Puddin’ Head Joe having classified documents in the possession of a think tank (an ironic contradiction if ever there was) and just now started turning them over. Of course, his staff knew about them on November 2, 2022, but hey. Why let a little something like having classified documents six years after leaving office disrupt an election that could determine how our country is governed for the next 2 years, amirite?
If that wasn’t bad enough, more classified documents were found in Biden’s home in Wilmington, Delaware. But don’t worry, folks. Ol’ Puddin’ Head Joe kept them perfectly safe, right next to his Corvette in his garage. And it just so happens, Joe’s son Hunter stayed at that residence for a time. Wow! If you can’t trust meth-heads with a penchant for underhanded deals and possible child porn on a laptop, who can you trust?
As you might expect, Leftists leapt into action…to say a) the documents were planted, b) Donald Trump is much worse, c) Joe is cooperating, and d) it was just a mistake.
How’s that boot tasting, Leftists?
As more and more comes out about this story, the more and more Leftists want to push it under the rug, even going to far as to say this scandal might take attention away from investigations into Republican wrongdoing. Then again, it was CNN saying that, so take it with a Lake City of Salt.
Since the Right doesn’t have memories like ferrets hooked on meth, people have been bringing up how the Trump and Biden document scandals are being handled. Which, of course, prompted the Left to come up with all sorts of Oktoberfest-level pretzel logic to explain why it’s just different, okay? But is it? Let’s find out.
As President, Donald Trump had the authority to declassify documents within a specific scope, hopefully with more reasoning than “because shut up.” Some things can be declassified under different provisions within the government and by following the proper procedures. We can debate whether Trump and his team followed those procedures another time because the point is he had the authority to declassify.
The Vice-President, on the other hand, can only declassify documents he (or now she) classified or generated by his/her office. Without knowing what was found at Puddin’ Head Joe’s office, home, and garage, we can’t really tell whether he followed the process correctly. Knowing him, he forgot all about it.
As far as what former Executive officials can take with them, well…that’s where things get a bit murky. (Surprise, surprise.) There are some requirements and loopholes for Presidents and Vice-Presidents with regards to classified documents. Again, the lack of specific details gives Joe a bit of breathing room legally.
Having said that, Puddin’ Head Joe’s got some ‘splainin’ to do. If what has been reported so far is accurate (and I can’t say for certain that it is), some of the documents in question had to deal with Iran, Ukraine, and the United Kingdom, as well as China. Now, I may be wrong here, but at least half of the countries mentioned don’t like us and one of them loves us…as long as we keep giving them money and guns. No word on if Ukraine is accepting our lawyers yet, but I’ll keep you posted.
And if you got that reference, you are officially old. And cool as hell.
While the way these documents came to light differs greatly from the raid on Mar-a-Lago, it’s important not to lose sight of the basic facts here: Puddin’ Head Joe had classified documents in his possession and failed to do his due diligence in returning them or notifying the proper authorities that he had them.
Before you Leftists give me this “he turned them in as soon as he found out” bullshit, let me remind you his term as Vice-President ended six years ago. And during that time, his meth-head son has access to those documents, which in and of itself is a security risk. Not to mention, Biden didn’t come forward with these documents as soon as he found out. He waited two more months after they were discovered.
If you flipped your shit over Trump holding onto classified documents for a year and a half, your shit better be doing a Cirque du Soleil routine if you want to remain consistent. If you’re not, then take a seat. In fact, take all of the seats. Especially that old dusty one in the corner, the one with the ripped upholstery.
And while we’re here, remember how Leftists got so concerned about whether Trump was selling nuclear secrets since some of the documents seized were allegedly about a foreign country’s nuclear capabilities? I do. It was a Neal Peart drum solo of drumbeats from the Left lamenting about how Trump was guilty (without evidence of anything happening, mind you) and still allowed to walk freely amongst the people (see previous comment in parens for the reason). Now, these hawkish Leftists aren’t squawking so much. Even known Leftist and fuckknuckle Joy Behar said we give Puddin’ Head Joe the benefit of the doubt because, essentially, he’s not Trump.
No, Joe isn’t like Trump. Trump wasn’t fucking stupid enough to put classified documents in a fucking garage!
Anyway, we’re in for a shitshow as more information about Puddin’ Head Joe’s classified documents come to light and the Left tries to explain it all way without success. I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting on an FBI raid of Joe’s home anytime soon.
Unless they find more on Hunter, that is.
Tag: mar a lago
Leftist Lexicon Word of the Week
If you think you’ve had a hectic week, just think of the week former President Donald Trump had. His social calendar (if not his Truth Social account) were a bit on the busy side, what with the FBI raiding…I mean visiting Mar-a-Lago looking for classified documents allegedly on the premises. Granted, I’m not sure who would want to hurt a Lago, let alone mar one, but that’s neither here nor there.
To say the Federal Bureau of Investigation has been in hot water in recent years is like saying President Joe Biden has a small problem with plagiarism: it’s accurate, but not nearly to the right magnitude. Now with the FBI under scrutiny again after their Mar-a-Lago visit, it’s as good a time as any to take a closer look at the agency.
the FBI
What the Left thinks it means – the most powerful law enforcement agency in America, full of hard working men and women upholding our laws and trying to stop criminals
What it really means – Barney Fife with less supervision
It wasn’t that long ago the FBI had a good reputation. In between J. Edgar Hoover’s trips to Victoria’s Secret, they managed to bring down criminals, keep the country relatively safe, and inspire young and old alike to be good citizens. But as all good things do, the image got some tarnish on it with some highly questionable decisions, like investigating and working against Martin Luther King, Jr. because Hoover thought he had Communist ties. (No word on if MLK had the matching suspenders.)
One could say the FBI’s image as beacons of law started to erode when Americans’ trust in government did. Watergate opened up the floodgates (if you’ll pardon the pun, and even if you don’t) as well as more than a few eyes to see the Emperor wasn’t wearing anything and Hoover himself was wearing a lace teddy and stiletto heels.
Okay, I’ve officially creeped myself out there.
From there, the agency could only watch as fewer and fewer people trusted the FBI. Of course, a history of domestic spying might make people a little paranoid…
Oddly enough, it was Leftists for the longest time who cried out the most about the FBI’s abuse of power, and with good reason. What the FBI did in the name of justice made a mockery of it in the worst way and caused serious damage to our nation for spurious reasons. But somewhere between then and now, the Left decided the FBI wasn’t so bad after all. And I think it started when Leftists ditched the love beads and Nehru jackets and put on suits and dress shoes to start working within the system they rallied against for so long. Either that or someone developed a strain of pot that made people want to join the FBI.
Saaaaaay…I might be onto something there!
Either way, when Leftists found their ways into positions of power, they did what they do best: fuck it all up through politics. Over time, the FBI has replaced actual justice with social justice and became tools of not the powerful, but the power-hungry. And thanks to the FBI, they ate very well, figuratively and literally.
As you might expect, the FBI found out it had a taste for power, too. I mean, when you are the most powerful law enforcement agency in the country and people can’t Karen their way into getting a supervisor, you tend to feel invulnerable. Oh, and did I mention they practically have unlimited funds thanks to the generosity of our Congresscritters? With that kind of power and money, you would hope the agency would work effectively.
And you’d be wrong. Here is a brief list of notable failures over the FBI’s recent history.
– ignoring red flags that Nikolas Cruz was likely to commit a crime, which lead to the Parkland, Florida, school shootings (Making David Hogg a national figure should be grounds to defund the FBI.)
– not following up on sexual abuse allegations against gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar, resulting in high-profile gymnasts making the issue public to get attention on the allegations and the agency’s failures
– playing a game of cyber chicken with Apple trying to force/coerce them into unlocking an iPhone belonging to one of the San Bernardino shooters and exposing proprietary technology
– the disastrous events of Waco and Ruby Ridge
– the bungled investigation into Hillary Clinton’s emails
Ranker lists 10 more beyond these, and Wikipedia has tons more, but you see the point. Our top cops make the Uvalde Police Department look like the cops on any of the 428 “CSI” programs on CBS right now. (I’m particularly a fan of “CSI: Nome.” Not a lot of cases, but the ones they get are intense!)
Of course with all of the negative attention around the FBI in recent years, FBI agents have hurt fee-fees. No matter what they do or what successes they have, people still like used car salesmen more than the FBI. First off, welcome to adulthood. Second, people might have a higher opinion of you if you didn’t constantly fuck up.
Which brings us to the raid on Mar-a-Lago. Although the Left ate up that red meat like a hungry lion (or Ron Swanson wanting a light snack), there are some serious questions to be answered, and our good friends at the FBI aren’t quick on providing them. More superficially, however, it just doesn’t look good. The more we discover about how the warrant was issued, the worse it gets for the FBI. Seriously, the only way it could have looked any more anti-Trump would be if Peter Strzok and Lisa Page were running it with James Comey riding shotgun.
And that’s a major issue for me. Politics and law enforcement don’t mix very well because at some point the former will hinder the latter. There is a reason Justice is blind, and it’s not so bribes can be taken under the table. It’s so every person is considered equal under the law, whether you’re Nancy Pelosi’s husband or Joe Sixpack. Unfortunately, though, our justice system is full of ideologically-driven people looking to recreate the law in their own images.
Guess which federal law enforcement agency with a three-letter abbreviation has that problem right now.
For the Left, that’s the perfect breeding ground. Almost unlimited funding, almost unlimited power, the intimidation factor, and a well-documented movement to reform law enforcement to make it more Leftist-friendly. No wonder the Left has been so quick to defend the FBI lately: it’s on their side. Just remember, Leftists were the ones who came to Strzok and Page’s defense, saying their text message on phones that belonged to the government (i.e. us) were private and shouldn’t be made public.
Even though these text exposed them as being anti-Trump and overtly willing to undermine his election.
Oh, well. I’m sure the FBI will get right on that investigation as soon as they charge more January 6 protestors for crimes that would normally get a slap on the wrist instead of years in jail awaiting sentencing.
Right now, the Federal Bureau of Investigation is Fucked Beyond Infinity because it’s lost sight of what it’s job and duties actually are. Nothing short of a wholesale refurbish would solve the problems the FBI has right now, but as long as the Left has its tentacles in it, nothing like that will occur. Unless it’s to get rid of conservative FBI agents, of course. They’re super-duper-dangerous, what with their belief in the Constitution and following the laws as written.
In the meantime, the best advice I can give is to not catch a federal charge. If you do, be prepared to enter a world of pain unlike anything you’ve seen since the last Pauly Shore standup show.
No One Is Above the Law…Except Us
After Donald Trump’s home at Mar-a-Lago had the FBI visit and look for alleged classified documents in his possession, the Left had a field day. Between jokes at the former President’s expense, memes recounting times when Trump made statements that now applied to him, and hoping this would finally be the thing that landed Trump in prison, Leftists were full of more hope than a Barack Obama rally.
There was also a common theme among the talking heads in the media and politics: no one is above the law. Although I’m happy to see Leftists embracing law and order for a change, let’s just say I’m not convinced they’re genuine and/or consistent in that sentiment.
Leftists being hypocrites? Heaven forbid!
Now, what I’m about to go over will likely get dismissed as “whataboutism” and there’s certainly an element of that in play. Having said that, these examples are necessary to lay out the groundwork for my argument.
For as close to an apples-to-apples comparison as I can get, we need to go back to May 2002 when former National Security Advisor Sandy Berger took classified documents out of the National Archive in his pants. (And I wish I were kidding about that last part.) After calling it an “honest mistake,” he eventually plead guilty in 2005. His punishment? Two years of probation, surrendering his law license, a loss of his security clearance for 3 years, and a promise to cooperate with investigators.
No FBI raids on his home. No wall-to-wall media coverage detailing every sorted detail of his crimes on a 25/8 continuous loop (because 24/7 isn’t enough, or because Common Core math took over telling time). Just an acknowledgement of the sentence, a hand-wave of the severity of the crime, and glowing obituaries upon the event of his passing.
Granted, Donald Trump hasn’t gone to the Great Mar-a-Lago in the Sky yet, but there is a decided difference in how the Berger and Trump document situations are being handled. Aside from a handful of balanced analyses from pundits like Alan Dershowitz and Jonathan Turley, the rule has been to assume Trump is guilty and deserves the treatment he’s gotten. Some even point to the Berger situation as precedent in the court of public opinion as a means to condemn Trump.
But there’s a bit more at play here outside of the “whataboutism.” Leftists believe in their superiority (just ask them), and try to shape the world to affirm it. When someone on the Left violates the law or acts inappropriately, it’s circle the wagons time! Only after it’s a done deal will Leftists acknowledge the actual crime, and usually as a means to dismiss it as old news.
That is if Leftists admit there was wrong-doing in the first place. Anyone remember Lois Lerner? If not, she was one of the people behind the IRS targeting political groups with connections to the TEA Party. After blaming the scandal on “low level employees,” the Department of Justice closed their investigation without Lerner being charged. Oh, sure, the DOJ report references mismanagement at all levels, but they allegedly didn’t find any laws being broken.
Unfortunately for them, there were. Lerner admitted to singling out applications for tax exempt status with the words “TEA Party” or “Patriot,” but argued those actions weren’t politically motivated. Yeah, and I’m the first Lutheran Pope. Where the legal violations come into play is when she turned over tax documents from the aforementioned groups to the DOJ.
Yeah. That’s illegal, not to mention unconstitutional. Remember, kids, Leftists say Roe v. Wade was based on a Constitutional right to privacy (that really isn’t in the Constitution, but play along with me here for a minute). That means the IRS violated the right to privacy of TEA Party groups. Oops.
But did the Leftists cheering the raid on Mar-a-Lago say much of anything about Lerner’s criminal and Constitutional missteps? Nope. They went along with the “low level employees” line, which was bullshit from the word go.
With Berger, Lerner, and any number of other Leftists (I’m looking at you, Eric Swalwell), no crime is too grave to excuse, or in most cases ignore, because they’re on the right side. And by “right side” I mean Left side. Bill and Hillary Clinton, Dianne Feinstein, Nancy Pelosi, Hunter Biden, and the whole Hee Haw Gang on the Left are a handful of examples of people who get to be above the law by virtue of being Leftists and having media Leftists (a redundancy, I know) cover for them by not covering them committing crimes.
Republicans, conservatives, and anyone else who falls outside the Leftist hivemind don’t get that treatment. If anything, they’re more heavily scrutinized to find every micron of dirt they can find to make the target of scorn look even more like Al Capone, only less honest. Speaking personally, I’m afraid opposition research will find I had an overdue library book in elementary school, which would certainly derail any hopes I had of becoming President. Or even County Supervisor of Creating Busy Work for Government Employees So They Don’t Actually Try to Do Real Work.
Why…it’s almost as if the Left’s version of law and order only goes one way!
Which, of course, to them it does. Since they are superior to us plebs, they write their own rules and excuse their own mistakes. But that’s not really justice; it’s rigging the system to one’s own benefit. Leftists will argue (without irony) this has been going on for quite some time and only through their efforts will everyone get a fair shake in the legal system. Yet, their efforts to give everyone a fair shake only reinforce the existing power structure where some people are treated better than others.
That’s called a self-own, kids.
Regardless of how you feel about Donald Trump, he was absolutely right about ideology trumping (see what I did there) justice. As more details come about about the Mar-a-Lago raid, I think we’ll see the former President proven right yet again.
And without having to lie to the FISA court, no less!